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#1
Apr 19, 2006, 09:23 PM
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I am really trying to be careful with what comes thru, since so much can trigger others..but I am having to cope with something that occured when I was 20, and ended up in shock at hospital..alot has do with this hostage incident, where I was emotionally and psychologically tortured by an escaped criminal. I wont go into it any further to much graphics..but there was shootings involved..my mind shut down afterwards, and I went mute and could not do ADL stuff, and was being taken care of in a hospital until I came around, I never sought treatment for its after effects..just kinda buried it, along with the rest of the gunk... When we started to work on anger Friday..I crashed the flashbacks and PTSD symptoms hurt so bad..I could not take what was coming thru.stll having problems..but I am working thru and taking ativan to help calm me down..just dont want to go back into the hospital as I process this..so trying to be careful..I keep diping back into it..I will post if I am not going to be around for awhile so my friends here wont worry...thank you all for your kindness..
The one thing that has helped me is that i have decided since allot of what happened afterwards is missing, I have asked the County Police department for help, and they are researching and providing me help..since it involved a shooting of a police officer too..they are being very supportive..and the hospital I was at is looking for records too..It just feels like I am taking something back..because I have no memory of anything after the incident, except waking up in the hospital screaming...maybe a few images but like I am in a dream.. Thank you all again for your support..this is what I am suppse to be writing about. to help work it thru..but I really dont know if I can do it..
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Evangelista We dance round in a ring and suppose.. But the secret sits in the middle and knows.. Robert Frost |
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#2
Apr 19, 2006, 09:47 PM
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By writing this you have taken a few steps towards writing that you were asked to do...I have been in similar spots and I know how hard this is on you
Hugs
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#3
Apr 19, 2006, 09:48 PM
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(( Evangelista ))
Yikes. You're dealing with a lot of heavy stuff. I'm sorry that happened to you, and that you have to deal with the life-altering after effects. If I can help in any way, don't hesitate to ask. |
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#4
Apr 19, 2006, 09:50 PM
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We're here to hear you and "cyber hold you" through this, Evangelista.
You're not alone. I'm sorry for your pain. kd
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#5
Apr 19, 2006, 09:51 PM
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really bad sleeps..dont know if I can..but trying to in bits and pieces..but hurts..thanks everyone..
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Evangelista We dance round in a ring and suppose.. But the secret sits in the middle and knows.. Robert Frost |
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#6
Apr 19, 2006, 09:54 PM
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((E)) You are doing it small steps are fine..and you did some....I know its very painful and I am sorry for that
safe hugs
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#7
Apr 19, 2006, 10:05 PM
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When I was talking to the police records today the officer..she felt so bad..because I just couldn't get out info..because it hurt so much..I just had images, not dates, I know I had just had my daughter she was about 6 months old..they said they would be working on it for me, if they had to pull every report..they dont get much officers shootings..so she said she is hoping someone who has been around for awhile will remember the incident..which would help..
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Evangelista We dance round in a ring and suppose.. But the secret sits in the middle and knows.. Robert Frost |
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#8
Apr 19, 2006, 10:08 PM
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sorry..this is even to much..right now..bad...
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Evangelista We dance round in a ring and suppose.. But the secret sits in the middle and knows.. Robert Frost |
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#9
Apr 19, 2006, 10:32 PM
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((((E))))
sorry you are feeling so down. I know the feeling. Your doing wonderfully at expressing it though |
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#10
Apr 19, 2006, 10:37 PM
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((((safe hugs)))) That sounds like a whopper of a trauma!
You might also ask the newspaper for info... back files. Sounds like something they would have covered. I caution you not to read it all by yourself though, as others provide information (police, hospital)... it might take a lot of patience, but if you can collect any info into a folder or such, and then begin to go through it at therapy, that would be so much safer for you... that would be GOOD therapy, imo. 
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#11
Apr 19, 2006, 10:46 PM
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thanx Sky..good ideas..
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Evangelista We dance round in a ring and suppose.. But the secret sits in the middle and knows.. Robert Frost |
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#12
Apr 21, 2006, 01:10 PM
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(((((((((((((((((Evangelista))))))))))))))))))
Sounds horrible hon! I went through something too where , like Sky said, I was able to get a hold of some newspaper articles. But again like Sky said you should not read them alone because it can be very intense. I am glad too hear that you are able to have some people who are helping you to get answers. Just go slow and please continue to write on here when you need too. HUGS Cher
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[b]If you can’t be a good example, then you’ll just have to be a horrible warning.[b] -Catherine Aird  |
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#13
Apr 22, 2006, 05:53 AM
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((Chery))
thank you
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Evangelista We dance round in a ring and suppose.. But the secret sits in the middle and knows.. Robert Frost |
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#14
Apr 23, 2006, 02:35 PM
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Unfortunately I remember and have experienced things you have mentioned. One thing that is great is that you are seeking and may recieve some justice and closure. I will never be able to.... for me it happened in europe and I have to learn to accept there will never be justice for me.... I admire what you are doing... don't give up and I wish you the very best,
Patricia xx |
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