I have been wondering about my mental health. I know I'm not healthy but I don't know if I should get help. I've had traumatic experiences and one affects me the most. Its so bad that all I want is to forget (which is impossible) but I keep having nightmares and flashbacks and certain things trigger memory. I avoid certain situations. I have a lot of worries and fears but they are understandable I guess in my situation. I'm a survivor of rape. I've tried to report but nothing was done. I still see him when I go places and it affects me so much to the point that I feel sick and all I want to do is hid and then I feel like I can no longer control my emotions. Many times when I see him or he gets too close I want to run, cry, curl up into a ball. Once I saw him and I felt as if time was moving very slowly. It was unusual and I've never had that happen before. I wish things were different but they're not. I'm unsure what to do.

[Open Eyes]

You need to reach out to a professional therapist/psychiatrist. You should not be trying to deal with this alone so please seek help.

[Bluegrey]

Well done for reaching out by posting here, Sarah. I know it's hard, but you have taken that first step.

I'm not sure how things work in the USA as I live in the UK, but when I started having concerns I went to my own GP - as in the doctor I would see for anything else. She was very helpful and gentle and referred me to a counsellor first of all. Then I went on to try CBT, and that therapist thought that EMDR might be better for me - I'm in the middle of that now. There are other ways of getting started, such as ringing a helpline. I know you have a different health system in the USA, I think there is a section on here somewhere about choosing a therapist which may be useful for you.

It does seem to take a long time from first plucking up the courage to talk to anyone but I think my brain needs to take its time dealing with all this anyway. The one thing that is certain is that my mind isn't going to let go of all this until it is sorted out. If it has been so long since your trauma I think you should definitely get some professional help.

It is difficult but it will lead to better things.


Bluegrey

its been about 9 months since the incident.

[puzzclar]

Talk with just a GP first and then there will be a referral to a specialist. And there are social workers, counselors that can help with talking through. And posting here helps as well.

[Open Eyes]

Ok, thats a long time and you still are having symptoms/challenges so you need to find a therapist to help you work through this. It's good that you have reached out here for help.
We are happy to be here to offer support.

((Hugs))

I will try and reach out to a therapist. But I find it hard to explain everything to a stranger.. I just feel so vulnerable and exposed. I've been trying before to just keep everything to myself and not talking about it to anyone in close to. I thought i could take care of myself on my own but i don't think its possible because i still have issues.

[Open Eyes]

(((sarah))), I did that too, and to be honest, others can relate to what you are saying as well. If you find a therapist that has experience with trauma and PTSD patients, he will understand how you struggle like this and make it a point to help you feel safe so you can begin the process of slowly talking about it with him/her. I kept a lot to myself too and as I mentioned this is actually what many who are struggling do too.

I am glad you found this support site so you have access to others who understand and can relate, it is really so helpful to have access to that kind of support.

((Hugs))
OE