Bullies

Bullies attack for a reason, but one we might not know or agree with. People who are mentally ill can become bullies without realizing it, don't you think? People who want, need, or expect the world to revolve around them can be bullies, simply because they never learned social skills and have such little respect for themselves that they have none for others.

I think the incidence of bullying increased with the increase of computers in the home, just as road rage increased. The constant INSTANT gratification that one receives from using the computer I think created high demand, expectation in many people. That reveals itself in public life when they can't have what they want or get to where they want to be because of other people.

The more the public becomes educated about bullying, and the more counter measures are taken, the less effect bullying will have and the more help bullies will receive to correct their attitudes and behavior. Just my POV.

TC

last night after feeling uselss and thinking about it
I searched on line and found this link too.

http://sandeelee.blogs.com/bullying/

taken from the link

"A bully can think of all kinds of ways to make another person feel hurt, afraid, uncomfortable, or just plain miserable. It can be physical, verbal, or emotional. Often bullies torment a victim over a long period of time, increasing the victim's sense of fear and distress."

thats what they do alright....

I posted this poem under my topic, "reviews of Please Stop Laughing at Me." I see I am not alone in battling bullies, maybe reading this will give you strength.

People are often unreasonable, irrational, and self-centered. Forgive them anyway.

If you are kind, people may accuse you of selfish, ulterior motives. Be kind anyway.

If you are successful, you will win some unfaithful friends and some genuine enemies. Succeed anyway.

If you are honest and sincere people may deceive you. Be honest and sincere anyway.

What you spend years creating, others could destroy overnight. Create anyway.

If you find serenity and happiness, some may be jealous. Be happy anyway.

The good you do today, will often be forgotten. Do good anyway.

Give the best you have, and it will never be enough. Give your best anyway.

In the final analysis, it is between you and God. It was never between you and them anyway.

-this version is credited to Mother Teresa

dunnit260
I took the end lines out
ty very well put
and with hope and peace....adn forgiveness and kindness

"Forgive them anyway"
"Be kind anyway."
"Be honest and sincere anyway"
"Create anyway"
"Be happy anyway"
"Do good anyway"
"Give your best anyway"
credited to Mother Teresa

maybe we could stop a bully by hugging them and thanking them for beeing soooooooooooo right and perfect all the time hahahaha

Florida's New Anti-Bully Law (State Statute)

Stepford Children, line up!

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dunnit260 said:
I posted this poem under my topic, "reviews of Please Stop Laughing at Me." I see I am not alone in battling bullies, maybe reading this will give you strength.

People are often unreasonable, irrational, and self-centered. Forgive them anyway.

If you are kind, people may accuse you of selfish, ulterior motives. Be kind anyway.

If you are successful, you will win some unfaithful friends and some genuine enemies. Succeed anyway.

If you are honest and sincere people may deceive you. Be honest and sincere anyway.

What you spend years creating, others could destroy overnight. Create anyway.

If you find serenity and happiness, some may be jealous. Be happy anyway.

The good you do today, will often be forgotten. Do good anyway.

Give the best you have, and it will never be enough. Give your best anyway.

In the final analysis, it is between you and God. It was never between you and them anyway.

-this version is credited to Mother Teresa

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Thank you for those words, dunnit260. It's hard enough to understand bullies IRL, but at least they are not as cowardly as those that hide online.

I wish it was that easy.
I wish a hug to them would make it stop.
I wish just being nice helped...
I wish I never had to have it happen again in my life or my kids
My sons school there is zero tolerance for bullys.
Once and your out. Which goes back to why i taught him not to hit back.
Which did not help when he was jumped.
But now he knows on the streets he can defend.
All as I know is its a issue in the whole world
and growing.
I did not like it when I was young
I do not like it now.
I really do not like it when it effects my kids....

peace and love and kindness i wish all felt for each other
muffy

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Orange_Blossom said:
</font><blockquote><div id="quote"><font class="small">Quote:</font>
dunnit260 said:
I posted this poem under my topic, "reviews of Please Stop Laughing at Me." I see I am not alone in battling bullies, maybe reading this will give you strength.

People are often unreasonable, irrational, and self-centered. Forgive them anyway.

If you are kind, people may accuse you of selfish, ulterior motives. Be kind anyway.

If you are successful, you will win some unfaithful friends and some genuine enemies. Succeed anyway.

If you are honest and sincere people may deceive you. Be honest and sincere anyway.

What you spend years creating, others could destroy overnight. Create anyway.

If you find serenity and happiness, some may be jealous. Be happy anyway.

The good you do today, will often be forgotten. Do good anyway.

Give the best you have, and it will never be enough. Give your best anyway.

In the final analysis, it is between you and God. It was never between you and them anyway.

-this version is credited to Mother Teresa

</div></font></blockquote><font class="post">

Thank you for those words, dunnit260. It's hard enough to understand bullies IRL, but at least they are not as cowardly as those that hide online.

</div></font></blockquote><font class="post">

My daughter and i have both had it happen online
thats the worst
muffy

PP&M (Peter, Paul, & Mary) sang a song called that, Don't laugh at me. You can find it at youtube... here are the lyrics

I'm a little boy with glasses
The one they call the geek
A little girl who never smiles
'Cause I've got braces on my teeth
And I know how it feels
To cry myself to sleep

I'm that kid on every playground
Who's always chosen last
A single teenage mother
Tryin' to overcome my past
You don't have to be my friend
But is it too much to ask

Don't laugh at me
Don't call me names
Don't get your pleasure from my pain
In God's eyes we're all the same
Someday we'll all have perfect wings
Don't laugh at me

I'm the cripple on the corner
You've passed me on the street
And I wouldn't be out here beggin'
If I had enough to eat
And don't think I don't notice
That our eyes never meet

I lost my wife and little boy when
Someone cross that yellow line
The day we laid them in the ground
Is the day I lost my mind
And right now I'm down to holdin'
This little cardboard sign...so

Don't laugh at me
Don't call me names
Don't get your pleasure from my pain
In God's eyes we're all the same
Someday we'll all have perfect wings
Don't laugh at me

I'm fat, I'm thin, I'm short, I'm tall
I'm deaf, I'm blind, hey, aren't we all

Don't laugh at me
Don't call me names
Don't get your pleasure from my pain
In God's eyes we're all the same
Someday we'll all have perfect wings
Don't laugh at me

(((((((((((((((((((Sky))))))))))))))))))))))))))

ty for sharing....... jin xoxoxoxo

if ya hug a bully it might stop them in there tracks, if ya give a bully a complement (sp) they won't know what to do, if ya don't react they can't be a bully

If a Bully is fire,,,Love is the water..

Fear,,it is always Fear..

IMHO.

Lenny

PS..Wonderfull lyrics Sky..I had forgotton that song..Thank you.

My son took it
did not react
His nose was broken when he was jumped
LAst week,,, he has a infection in his nose now.
2 black eyes
He did nothing to deserve it
He had no fear then

He was on crutches cause he had a broken ankel

OH Muffy,,you misunderstood me..I'm sorry..It is the Bully that is filled with fear...

I'm sorry...I think my time here is running out...I don't posess the communication skills necessary...

Again,,I'm sorry Muffy,,,I was not insulting your son...

Lenny

Lenny
I did not take yours as a insult
so sorry it came out that way to you
My communcation skills are real bad
You are right the bullys are the ones with fear
I think they fear everything
Your great here at pc
no worrys
muffy

(((Everyone)))) kindness is easily identified as kindness, bullying wears many masks... bullies have no place in a civilized society imo

I wish with all my heart that no one ever had to feel bullyed.
I wish it just never was...
I have never in my whole life understood it..
I wish all of you safeness and peace and love
I wish you to know you are good ppl
(((and you all matter)))))))))
((((orange))))))))))))))))))))))
(((((((nowheretorun)))))))))))))))))))))
((kathy)))))))))))
((((((sweet)))))))))))))
((((Lenny))))))))))
((((((((Kaika ))))))))
(((((justgiving)))))))))
(((((fuzzy)))))))))))))
((dunnit260 ))))))))
((sky)))
((jinn)
(nothemama8)

muffy
the lamb

((((((((((((((((((((Muffy)))))))))))))))))))

(((((((((((((((everyone))))))))))))))))))))))))

Jinny xoxoxoxoxoxo

never forget you matter too ((muffy))))

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Lenny said:
OH Muffy,,you misunderstood me..I'm sorry..It is the Bully that is filled with fear...

I'm sorry...I think my time here is running out...I don't posess the communication skills necessary...

Again,,I'm sorry Muffy,,,I was not insulting your son...

Lenny

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misunderstandings happen Lenny... i hope you stay with us.. i read a lot of your work even if i dont reply.. you have both my support and friendship

found this today
Its on cnn found it intersting

By Judy Fortin
CNN Medical Correspondent

SMYRNA, Georgia (CNN) -- A week before the start of the new school year, principal Denise Magee roamed the hallways of Campbell Middle School in Smyrna, Georgia, preparing for battle.

Middle-school principal Denise Magee says a best-case scenario would be a school year without bullying.

The adversary? Preteen and teenage bullies.

Toting anti-bullying posters and masking tape, Magee was determined to let students see from Day One that she had a zero-tolerance policy when it came to that kind of harassment.

"Middle-school kids are just cruel to each other," Magee said. "They speak their minds, so you see bullying in the form of teasing, taunting, social isolation and name calling."

The U.S. Department of Health and Human Services estimated that 30 percent of all children in grades six through 10 have been bullied or have bullied other children during a school year.

Clinical psychologist Mark Crawford of Roswell, Georgia, called the statistics unacceptable. "Bullying is not a rite of passage," he said. "It always has a bad outcome."

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Crawford said several times a month he hears complaints from young patients who are victims of bullies. And he worried about the consequences. "Kids who are bullied are at greater risk of physical symptoms, physical complaints, emotional problems and academic underachievement."

Parenting expert Stacey DeBroff, author of "The Mom Book," cautioned that bullying often occurs in places that aren't monitored by adults, such as a walking route to and from school, a corner of a playground and the Internet.

She warned mothers and fathers to be on the lookout for signs a child is being bullied. "When you see signs of being anxious, sad and withdrawn, of having a kid move off their typical personality, it alerts you that something is going on."

Crawford noted that some of those symptoms can be attributed to typical adolescent behavior, but he added, "When you see a real change in a child's personality or their normal routine, it's a bad sign." Health Minute: Watch more on defeating bullies »

He also conceded that some children won't open up to their parents about bullying. "One of the reasons kids don't tell their parents they are being bullied is the fear that their parents will run in and do something about it and they think that will make it worse."

Anti-Bullying Tips
"Stop Bullying Now"suggests these tips to help your child:

1. Encourage your child to reach out to friendly students in his class and in other environments.

2. Help your child gain more confidence by developing musical, athletic or artistic talents.

3. Teach your child safety strategies; assure him that reporting a bully isn't "tattling."

4. Let your child know that home will always be a safe place. DeBroff agreed that it is tempting for some parents to rush in to solve the problem by calling the bully's parents. "You often know them, your kids have been in school together, you feel like calling them up...so they're on the defensive and really it's never a point of resolution."

Crawford said that it's important to do your homework before attempting to resolve the situation.

He encouraged parents to talk with their child first and get them to open up about what's happening. "You need to find out when it is happening, where it is happening and exactly what is going on," he said.

When elementary age children are involved, Crawford recommended parents intervene more quickly. "Younger kids have a limited arsenal from which to draw," he said. "They don't necessarily know how to be more assertive."

Middle-school students may want to have some control over the situation, according to Crawford.

In that case, he said it might be a good idea to go over possible scenarios and options that will help them put a stop to the bullying.

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DeBroff said it is important to ask for help from a teacher or school administrator. "They want to know about it because it ripples into the classrooms and places that aren't visible to them."

Magee, the middle-school principal, agreed. "I do not want parents to leave us out of the scenario," she said. "I want them to immediately contact us."

But be judicious, she urged. Some parents can inflame the situation. "You will encounter situations where parents will tell their kids, 'If you are hit, I want you to hit back.' "

Experts point out it is important for parents to keep emotions in check and to not encourage a child to hit back or retaliate.

Instead, DeBroff suggested parents become strategic advisers to their child and help them avoid bullying situations.

Health Library
MayoClinic.com: Children's Health

In a couple of weeks, after her students get settled, Magee plans to hold grade-level meetings about her school's anti-bullying policy.

In the meantime, she remained optimistic and hoped this school year will be different. "The best-case scenario as local school principal? We are bullyproof, fully free of any bully incidents, that we are truly here with academic focus, no fighting, no teasing, no name calling, none of that. We're here to learn."

sorry to over post myself
I had wanted to say I like the zero tolerance

plus this part
:Crawford said several times a month he hears complaints from young patients who are victims of bullies. And he worried about the consequences. "Kids who are bullied are at greater risk of physical symptoms, physical complaints, emotional problems and academic underachievement."

Parenting expert Stacey DeBroff, author of "The Mom Book," cautioned that bullying often occurs in places that aren't monitored by adults, such as a walking route to and from school, a corner of a playground and the Internet.

She warned mothers and fathers to be on the lookout for signs a child is being bullied. "When you see signs of being anxious, sad and withdrawn, of having a kid move off their typical personality, it alerts you that something is going on."

Crawford noted that some of those symptoms can be attributed to typical adolescent behavior, but he added, "When you see a real change in a child's personality or their normal routine, it's a bad sign." Health Minute: Watch more on defeating bullies »"

((muffy)))) thank you for posting more information on this topic.. its so hard for the kids to learn when they are so afraid.. 30% is a hugely high number of students... even if the other 70% didnt say so, with such a large percentage of students admitting the effects of bullying, it has to affect the others in an indirect way as well...

if bullying is a learned trait, i believe it can be unlearned also... education is important if we want to understand causes and cures...

it may be idealistic to imagine that bullying can be completely eliminated but its a place to start and if we dream, why not dream big?

even bullies admit that being bullied is no fun.. i imagine many choose bullying because they imagine it is a matter of survival...

i would hope that people can see that harming others and being harmed are two sides of the same coin (harm)

we can stop the harming if we could understand that we are only running towards bullying, in a crazy effort to escape it, when we choose bullying..