What orientation T supports "inner child?"

That is so sad that any therapist would refuse to give a hug just because someone has BPD. Honestly, talk about black and white thinking! A hug, when appropriate, is so healing. Not everyone with BPD has blurred boundaries either.

Good luck in your search for another T. I hope you find someone who knows how to help with attachment.

Rainbow- That is really strange about the remark about the hugs. Personally, that would mean to me that I needed a T who saw me as a person first before some diagnosis. BPD=No hug How ridiculous! And sad for the rigidness of a T who treats clients this way. Dt was like that. And....a red flag for me was that she referred to a pdoc for meds who was AWFUL. He reminded me of Jabba The Hut (spelling that right?).

Id make some calls to some T's after coming up with a list of priorities for a new T. The inner child work sounds like a good question, someone who goes deep, someone who works on attachment issues and uses the theraputic realtionship as a tool for healing.

Rainbow,

I'm sorry you had a T who brought your diagnosis into things when it came to boundaries and hugging.

As far as I know, the concept of 'inner child' comes from Transactional Analysis (nothing to do with psychoanalysis). Maybe try looking this up. I used to see a psychiatrist who also was a transactional analyst (a type of therapy) and he did once explain a little of the theory to me - I only saw him for meds though and I didn't really feel a click with him.

Like people have said, psychodynamic/psychoanalytic therapies generally involve (or encourage) looking into your past to understand underlying problems and how they emerge (I do psychoanalytic psychotherapy - I have worked a lot through my past and it's helped me a lot - I haven't dont 'inner child' work though as such). There is also 'Transference Focused Therapy' which is psychoanalytic/psychodynamic in origin but specially developed for patients with personality-based problems (personality disorders).

Onzi

I think T.A. is considered one of the humanistic therapies. It's interesting that I bought that book on T.A. ("Games People Play") decades ago--I don't know why--and I read it through, just dipped in here and there. Now 30+ years later I am actually involved in this kind of stuff. It had its appeal for me even then.

Rainbow, it sounds like you are getting a good list together of what you want in therapy and won't you don't. This will be helpful in finding your next T.

Rainbow,

I would not let the comment your former t said about hugs discourage you. Not every clinician feels the same way about meeting nurturing needs.

Based on what you're looking for in a therapist, I would ask these questions:

What is your experience in working with patients who have attachment issues?

Do you think it is important to look at the patient's past in order to find out how to solve problems in the present?

Do you do transactional analysis, family systems, or inner child work?

What is your view on using touch in therapy?

Peaches, those are good questions. Thank you. I decided that it's not so much "inner child" per se, but I need someone who will let me bring my child issues into the therapy room yet who will not let me regress back into being a child.

I left a message for the T I liked, told her I liked her photo and what she wrote, and asked if she knew anyone similar. Her voice was nice too! I'm so scared now; I don't know why. I said I must see someone on my insurance.

Her message said to "leave a message of any length." I was tempted, LOL, to give my whole life's story but I restrained myself! I don't want to call any of the others yet.

She called me back, but said she didn't know anyone who takes insurance, and gave me one name to check out. I'm disappointed. Actually, she didn't sound so great on the phone. I'm afraid I'm too picky now! I'm going to have to talk to them, or schedule a visit. Most do that for free.

This is SO hard to do.

(((((((((((rainbow8))))))))))))) you are doing great. You are taking charge and asking for what you need. Please don't get discouraged, all our T relationships started with a first visit. Sometimes it took trying different people, like in your case. I know it's hard but try to stay with it.

rainbow, you are doing great in your new T search. it does take time to find the right T and it is a bit by bit process of reading profiles, then talking to them and then meeting them where we gain a fuller picture of who they really are. some might seem great from a profile but a dud on the phone. i think many of us have had that happen. you don't sound too picky to me from what you wrote. i do think you have to talk to them to get a little sense of who they are. don't give up and trust your gut on this!

Hi Rainbow,

You're doing good! Don't get discouraged just because the first couple of t's aren't the right ones for you. Keep looking! There's lots of fish in the sea!

Rainbow let your T know you want to do inner child work if he or she is good they will no what to do.