Am I still welcome here?

Probably no one remembers me. That may be for the best... Since I last was active, I've gotten a new, great job. I'm using my degree, and have been working as a therapist. I've been reading here, but feel weird about posting. To be a patient as well as a therapist.... it's weird.

I am in a weird place. I'm m.i. But I am also a well-trained clinician, with a Master's degree. What I need is a place to be open and honest about me as a client. But I feel strange. I feel ackward.

I'm having a very difficult time in therapy now. And I know some people here don't want a therapist who has issues of her own treating them. I'm a good clinician , with good supervision and excellent training. I k ow what I'm doing. But in my own life I still struggle.

I want to belong here again. I want to post again. As moonrise. As an honest moonrise, who sits on both sides of the room.

As a client, I feel so small and hurting, wanting, needing. As a therapist I'm wise, compassionate, strong. How odd that I'm both.

Am I welcome here? I'm interested in all thoughts, because I really want to know. I've gotten much support from many of you in the past, and I want to still be a part of the community.

-moonrise

I don't see any reason why you can't come back here. Everyone needs someone to talk to, even when you have a Master's Degree.

I think it would be interesting to hear from you, given your dual perspective!!

My better therapists have been the ones most self-aware of their own issues. Welcome!!!

I feel that you would have a lot to offer as we all do. My old therapist was a client as well. She often would understand things from the client perpective. Be who you have to be here.
I welcome you and I know that I don't know you that well but i still think that you should post whenever you want.

Thank you. Degrees are nothing. We all know pain and struggle. Sometimes I think that I got my degree and license because I thought I could heal myself. If only....

Thanks, growly. Love your name.

I'm a psych major as well (I'm 1 semester from my bachelor's degree). So I completley understand when you said you think you got the degree/license to help yourself! I think thats the main reason I went into my field, but in the long run I was able to figure out that I can help others too. I totally understand how you feel, and welcome (back) to the forum!

I've always managed to split myself quite well. It's been so so helpful in my work to see things from the "other side". But I've kept each side hidden from the other. I've only had this dual role for a few months. But I know I'm a better therapist because of what I've seen as client.

I feel so hidden in life. Only my therapist knows the struggle. And even here I split, and relate not as moon the therapist but moon the client. I think being in both roles makes me feel unsure of who and what I am.

(warm smiley, but I'm on my iPhone) thank you.

It's a little disconcerting to think that one's therapist might be as unwell as oneself. I think it's fine for you to be here though. I wish you the best.

is not relevent about the mental health of a therapist. thats like saying i cant look after people as a carer because im not well myself. Therapists are still people, I think too many people put there therapists on a pedastal to say that they cant have their own issues. You wouldnt have a clue if your therapist was struggling. My therapist went through divorce and a breakdown and was still competent to help me. I only knew her suffering after it had happened and after termination.

Welcome back

One of my heroes is Kay Redfield Jamison. She is a clinical psychologist who is one of the foremost experts on bipolar disorder and also has bipolar disorder herself. She is also an author and I am a huge fan of her books.

Yep. I totally get this. As a client, I need to feel my therapist knows what the heck she's doing. As a therapist I know I do, in my therapist role.

We want our t's to be stronger than us, more knowledgeable. I am so much stronger in my role as a therapist than in my life outside. I get panicky when I encounter my t outside her office. Yet when I encounter a client at the mall, I am concerned about them, and wonder how their experience of it is.

As a t, I have no place to talk about being a client. As a client I feel weird talking when I'm a t. Sucks.

In my office I know what to say, how to help, how to listen and be. As a client I know my role. But no where can I be who I am, which is both.

I don't even know if I can do this, be me in both roles.

A few friends in real life know, but none of them is in therapy.

So, yeah, I understand. And I agree. At one point in my life I was very, very sick. But that allows me to understand things in a different way than someone who hasn't been there.

And although my clients may never know my history, if I can make it out, survive, and live, I hold the deepest hope that they will, too. That hope, that belief in one's strength, cannot be faked. I

Thanks for your honesty, and your welcome b

Me, too. I hold onto that vision, of being me, scarred, broken, human. Someday....

Yes !!!!

not that it's good your t struggled, but good that she was still helpful to you, and able to be a good t while struggling herself.

i remember you moonrise! welcome back

I am a client as well as a master's level clinician.
I enjoy reading/responding to the boards, and am able to utilize my experiences being on both sides of the fence. It is most definitely quite a view.

Good to see you moonrise

I do not have a degree, but I read psychology books looking for the cure, the fix. Here I am, though...

Thank you, moonrise for understanding what I said.

It is VERY relevant to me. Very much so. Maybe not to you, but to me it is. I KNOW therapists are people and I do not put mine above me. I didn't say they can't have their own issues. I just want and need my therapist to currently be in better mental health than I am and I KNOW he is and it's comforting to me.

I actually went into a helping/caring profession (social work) and decided I couldn't do it. It would not have been fair for me to try to help people when I couldn't help myself. I think therapists can be good even if they need help, but I couldn't do it.

Welcome back, moon!

I am happy you're here....

Yes I begun and therapy college course and packed it in half way through, to much of my own stuff was leaking out. I think its fine if those in the helping professions have had difficulities and healed, but if they're practising and not healed, well, I'd rather not be their client, as much as we want to believe we can split our wounds off, I think unconsiously the are there.

I totally agree. That makes so much sense.

Glad your here Moonrise.

Up until 7 years ago, I worked in the violence prevention field for many years. 4 yrs ago I finally sought help to deal with my own stuff. Through it I have found that everyone is human, everyone struggles to one degree or another. I think those of us who are seeking help are responsible and ahead of the game in some respects.

My own addiction therapist struggled herself at times, and still does - the human condition. This view has helped me see that perfection doesn't exist, I don't have to attain it, as it is pretty much impossible to attain.

Being on both sides of the helping profession has given me a wealth of information and skills. It's also helped me join the human race again. To be a helper doesn't mean I don't have problems and need assistance myself at times.

Anyhow, rambling. Glad your here.

You are very welcome here as far as I'm concerned.

I think it enhances the site to have people from all walks of life giving and getting support.

best to you in your healing path

fins

She is such an inspiration. I think you can be too. You have a unique insight to see mental illness from both sides. It gives you a greater understanding that can't be taught. I always say that trying to explain how it feels to someone who has never been through it, they don't really understand.

Hold onto that vision and I wish you strength and inner understanding to find yourself