How do I forgive myself?

She wants to do EFT and The Empty Chair with me, but I have refused to do it. I know that she wants me to try new things because I get stuck in certain areas and do not want to visit them. Forgiveness is one of them. She strongly believes that I will have positive outcomes if I would allow myself to try new things. I can't do it, though. I would feel stupid!!

This is good question for me to ask in my session tomorrow. "What are YOU doing to help me learn to forgive myself?"

We do talk about many, many other things. It always happens that somewhere in our sessions, I will start putting myself down and making negative comments about myself. She says this is where it is evident that I am beating myself up for things in my past. I blame myself for why I am how I am, and for why I am in the shape I am in today.

Well, I AM the reason! I was the one who made those decisions. I have to take ownership, don't I?

Yep, I can't tell you how many times I've told T, "I feel stupid." And I'll do it again today as I venture into some role playing exercises. I do feel stupid and self-conscious and it's very embarrassing. But I want to give anything a chance if it might help.

When you keep repeating the same negative words about yourself, you are deepening that groove in your brain. I do the same thing. But all we need is a slight shift in perspective to give us a completely new vision. I have experienced that and it is magical.

Try to be bold enough to 'embrace' your 'stupidity'. Heck, what's to lose except our silly sense of what? - uh, maturity?, uh, self-control?, uh, intelligence?, uh, level-headedness?, uh, whatever self-image we have that we don't want to mess with?

Take a leap!!!!! All the logical arguments in the world will not make a difference. A perfect example is dieting. Everyone knows what is best to eat and what to avoid. We all could argue a perfect case. But when we're facing a luscious chocolate cake, it takes more than knowledge to be able to resist.

Getting in deeper than logic is necessary. Going further than argument is able to do, is required. Plunging in to our core is essential.

But you did try a new thing this week. You moved forward with your relationship with your husband.

Why do you think you feel stupid trying new things? (Maybe this is why you fight acceptance and forgiveness?)