[allthegirls6]

Its all my fault. Smoke screens, etc when all i want to say is ....................................................

Im frustrated, feeling unheard and ever so down about it. How can I sort it all out when it seems to have got so big and unruly. How can I bring it back to something that helps instead of something that leaves me feeling alone. I have a wonderful T. Its me who sucks

atg

[Lexicon78]

Have you tried writing down everything you want to say and then reading it to your T and then explaining that to him/her? Just a suggestion.

[bipolar_bear]

I have such a hard time expressing myself when I am there with my therapist that she had me journal every day and e mail it to her. Otherwise we talked about her agenda rather than what I wanted to say. It has really helped as I felt the way you do until I did this. I am so sorry as it is a terrible feeling and frustrating to go and have it get a life of its own and not say anything you intended or nothing at all. Just a suggestion I hope you come up with a method that works for you.. Take care.

[(JD)]

(((girls))) I'm not privy to how recently you were dx'd nor how long you have been in therapy.. but with DID, as with many dx's therapy is a process. Be gentle with yourself (selves) and realize that slower is faster in your case... keep a journal, makes note for your T with what you feel is most important, then trust your T to guide you. TC

[Gemstone]

{{{{ ATG }}}}}}

[SleepsWithButterFlies]

(( ATG )) I am sorry you feel like crap....Would it help to tape what you wanna say and play the tape in therapy? Is it possible it's partly T?

[SleepsWithButterFlies]

ATG I think what you do is tell T that something is wrong and you THINK it may be you but it may be T or both of you and then talk on how it sucks

One thing that helps me is that I keep a nightly journal. The night before my sessions when I am writing in my journal I look back at the past two weeks of entries. (the entries between the last session and the one the next day.I pick out the important stuff that I want her to know and then either list it on a paper or things related to that issue. I put them into my back pack. That way when I leave the next day for the local library my therapy stuff is already in there. While waiting for my therapist in the lobby I look over the stuff I brought so that its fresh in my mind what I want her to know. During the sessions if I get stuck all I have to do is open the backpack saying I brought some stuff with me. I have been known to tape record what I wanted to say to past therapists or call their voicemail between sessions with a I don't want to forget to tell you type message or just ramble. My past therapist loved my middle of the night "babbles" as I call it. she found out so much through those 2-3am calls. things I probably never would have said otherwise. Workbooks are a great starting point too. I do them on my own then hand them in to my therapists. They read them, ask questions and ideas and so on from that and I don't have to worry about "what do I say now?" As for smoke screens therapists can see through those anyway regardless of if they say so or not. They're trained to recognise snow jobs and avoidance so I don't even try. I flat out tell them something is wrong but Im not ready to talk about it yet. for me usually the reason I don't say something is that I am worried about how they would react or I don't want to tell them something too soon. and I tell them that its too early they wouldn't understand. If the therapist is on the wrong track from where I am I tell them words like "thats not it, its this instead" The therapists never get mad at me for it and have actually thanked me for getting THEM back on track.