[granite1]

i still have time untill i see my T again but today i accually seem to be calm.i have taken some time off from work and have only gone in today and yesterday to do the orders that needed to be done and then went home.by the time my T sees me again i will probibly not have anything to say.i have to go to work tomorrow and start my 10 hour days untill monday and then i get to see T.i hope the week goes smoothly.i just hope people just leave me alone.

[arcangel]

I'm really glad you posted an update. Even better that it's positive.
I'll hope with you

[rainbow_rose]

Originally Posted by granite1

i still have time untill i see my T again but today i accually seem to be calm.i have taken some time off from work and have only gone in today and yesterday to do the orders that needed to be done and then went home.by the time my T sees me again i will probibly not have anything to say.i have to go to work tomorrow and start my 10 hour days untill monday and then i get to see T.i hope the week goes smoothly.i just hope people just leave me alone.

calm ... seems like a nice place to be, granite.

[mixedup_emotions]

Breathe a big sigh and take in the calm.....I try to enjoy those moments as much as possible. I'm glad you're in a better place at the moment. (( HUGS ))

[PTSDlovemycats]

That sounds good Granite. Great job on standing up for yourself!

Granite, I am soo glad to hear you are calm. I love that word, calm. I like the word gentle as well. Take care of you tomorrow at work. You are worth it

sending safe hugs

[sittingatwatersedge]

(((((((((((((((((((( granite ))))))))))))))))) how you doing today?

[granite1]

i want my T back now i am doing ok today so im not so mad at her i just want her back so i can just sit with her,i want to look out her window.i miss T

[rainbow8]

((((((granite))))))

I'm glad you feel calm! That is great to hear from you. They must think you are a responsible worker if you are in charge of the department (I forgot exactly what you said) and you need to work so many hours. It's good that you could take some time off before you have to work those hours. 10 hours is a long day! Can you take breaks?

I know how it feels to miss your T but, you know, I think it's a good sign for you. It's good that you feel safe enough to want to sit with her and look out the window. Monday will come and you will be able to do that.

[granite1]

Originally Posted by rainbow8

((((((granite))))))

I'm glad you feel calm! That is great to hear from you. They must think you are a responsible worker if you are in charge of the department (I forgot exactly what you said) and you need to work so many hours. It's good that you could take some time off before you have to work those hours. 10 hours is a long day! Can you take breaks?

I know how it feels to miss your T but, you know, I think it's a good sign for you. It's good that you feel safe enough to want to sit with her and look out the window. Monday will come and you will be able to do that.

i get 1 hr lunch i am homw on lunch now today so far is good i have a kind of strange calm over me dont know if it is calm or numbness.i dont really care it feels good for now.i do also think it is good that i want to sit with my T or that i am even thinking about her in a non angry way.wee will see how i feel after this weekend

[granite1]

i just wanted to share that i didnt break down at work today,i know it sounds stupid but these days it is a big deal.my esr came and checked in with me and called me sweety and all like she usually does so she isnt mad at me like i thought.she was letting me know that the distric mgr is going to be getting involved with what is going on .they are fighting to get me help over in my department.i was even able to talk to her some .like saying hi and i'm ok and a little about what i want for help and i didnt panic or break down .i have a huge weekend comming up whare i will be working 10 hrd days non stop and than it will be over.the place will be calm aggain and back to normal . hears to hoping i stay calm or numb or whatever it is untill monday

[ECHOES]

I get the being grateful for a day at work without breaking down.

I'm sorry that you are having to go through this thing at work, but I am amazed at how you are able to reach out and let someone in, talk to them, let them help you, and feel how nice that feels!

[Sannah]

WOW! Great work Granite!

[granite1]

i just was writing in my journal about how much my T is gone on mondays and looked at the calendar to see the forth is on a monday.WOW what a F#$%ing surprise. i am just so tired of her not being thare.why bother i think i am done and i will spend the next two sessions trying to tell her this .i just cant seem to build any trust.i dont see her enough at all.her time away from me seems much more important.

[sittingatwatersedge]

hi Granite yr T can't help it if July 4 falls on a Monday this year. Since that's weeks away, maybe you could look into changing yr appointment for that week? hope it works

[ECHOES]

Originally Posted by granite1

i just was writing in my journal about how much my T is gone on mondays and looked at the calendar to see the forth is on a monday.WOW what a F#$%ing surprise. i am just so tired of her not being thare.why bother i think i am done and i will spend the next two sessions trying to tell her this .i just cant seem to build any trust.i dont see her enough at all.her time away from me seems much more important.

(((( granite )))) I think your missing T and when you saw the 4th being on Monday it felt like she left you again. In truth, she hasn't left you again and will return soon.

This would be a good thing to discuss when she gets back - the fact that most legal holidays are on Monday, so could she agree to schedule you a different day those weeks, and could she do that now for Labor Day and Christmas as well as the 4th of July, and then you'll be all set!

[SpiritRunner]

I am glad you feel calm.......hope you keep feeling calm! I am thinking of you.....