[crazycanbegood]

I got my pdoc back who I was estranged from. Things are great with my T. Things are good. I am surrounded by people who care about me, despite my massive crazy.

[confused and dazed]

still sad....hate this....sometimes life just sux.... can't wait til T gets back... hopefully he can help.

Had a very busy, l o n g day! Will have new students in the morning. I am pretty sure they will wear me out before the day is over!

[kaliope]

Rose76, Great news! Keep up the good work!

Im tired tonight. Been a long day. nine hour shifts when i am used to 6. was going to take friday off but now someone has an emergency and needs to go out of town and needs me to cover. bummer. at least i have made it a second day without falling apart or spazzing out over anything. T is seeing me friday so i dont have to wait till next week, another weekend like last would do me in.

It was a long day of driving from one end of the Dallas Fort Worth metroplex to the other taking my husband to various doctor's appointments. He's doing well though and will go back to work tomorrow for at least a few hours. Temperature today in Dallas was a lovely 112 degrees for the second day in a row. We've now gone 33 straight days with temperatures over 100. The heat is wearing me out. I'm going to see my t tomorrow for the 2nd time this week. I'm struggling a bit with depression and need to keep grounded.
v

[rainbow8]

I emailed my T for the first time since last week. I had to cancel the next appointment with my H and me, so of course I wrote 2 pages about everything! I even told her I think I was angry with her last session because she wouldn't tell me she loves me when we discussed it a few weeks ago! I also wrote her all the good things I've been doing this week to stay calm, peaceful, and connected with other people!

[Korin]

Doing good but slightly confused by the snippets of aggression I’ve been feeling lately. Is somebody peeing me off and I’m unaware of it consciously, and yet some part of me is aware of it.

[Rose76]

I have a bug and am I feel a bit sick. Mentally, I am still feeling quite good. My sleep pattern is strange, of late. I fall asleep earlier than usual, and then I wake up before dawn, after only a few hours. Less than four hours this past night.

[Butterflies Are Free]

Dear T,
I had a great time at the art museum yesterday and when I see you today, I can't wait to tell you about it! I am also excited about sharing/looking at the letter I wrote to my father(I didn't send it). See you soon!

[kaliope]

doing good so far today. slept in. just got off phone call with ATT over my internet service. been trying to straightn out my bill for seven months. i returned a modem and they never credited it. they noted they received it, just never credited. they turned off my internet service last night DESPITE the guy finally crediting it the day before yesterday. apparently it takes a couple days for credits to show up. then they are trying to tell me i owe another sixty for some mysterious reason. i almost cried, but i held it together and it eventually got straightened out. i should have my internet back this evening. doesnt matter though. someone in the complex here has unsecured wireless which i am hijacking at this very minute.

have appt with T tomorrow early. i havent been doing well since last appt. i need to tell him that i have been taking a med that wasnt prescribed for me by my current doc for about nine months and been doing ver well on it in conjunction with the med my doc prescribed and i havent been doing as well now that i have run out. maybe i will post a thread for advice.

I am worn out! First day with my students. They were great, but I am not used to being on my feet that much. My brain is fried at the moment.

Not feeling great and T is on vacation till the end of the month.
All the bills are overdue cause we have barely any income, and I am scared.
I wish T was here. I e mailed him though. He will answer soon.

[kaliope]

doing ok today. t let me down. im just going to have to be brave on my own. he told me how to do it so i will just have to follow his direction. long boring day ahead. at least its money.

[Rose76]

My viral thing is going away. I finally caught up on sleep. My depression has gone off somewhere and I hope it gets lost and can't find its way back to me. Not being down makes life seem so much different. I'm completing projects around the house that got neglected. Now I have 2 clean rooms. (2 more to go.) Ironing today. I must really feel good.This is like a miracle.

[Rose76]

I'm still free of my symptoms of depression. I'm cleaning my place like crazy. I'm hoping this is me actually recovering from Major Depression. However, in case it's a passing temporary uplift in mood, I figure get as much productivity out of it as I can - while it lasts. I ironed for hours, and it was hot here this afternoon. I took down curtains, and hung up clean, freshly ironed ones. I ironed a nice cotton shower curtain that I like a lot. I haven't been in such a good mood in a long,long time.

[nicoleb2]

Having an interesting day. Talked to my husband for almost 2 hours about things we need to change or else end up divorced...

Kind of having the urge to cut right now... not really bad yet, but bad enough

[pachyderm]

Originally Posted by nicoleb2

Having an interesting day. Talked to my husband for almost 2 hours about things we need to change or else end up divorced...

Kind of having the urge to cut right now... not really bad yet, but bad enough

I see a connection. Distress causes the wish to cut in order to relieve the feelings.

[ECHOES]

I just worked out my budget for the rest of the year. That makes me feel very relieved because I know exactly where each pay is going so the anxiety about that is relieved.
I use an index card system. Each card is a payday. I write out on a separate sheet of paper what date of the month each bill is due and the amount. Then on each card, I list the bills that will be paid on that payday. I also include the remainder after bills so I can focus on that, and see that I DO have the ability to save if I am careful, frugal, and committed to saving. I want to save because there is power in having a savings, crises are fewer, choices are greater.

My T was away this week and it's been a nice break for a change. I don't feel like I'm 'white-knucling' it or repressing anger about her being gone like I have in the past. It's just a week we are going our own way and that's okay. I will be happy to see her next week and am looking forward to that

[sunrise]

I am tired of not being able to sleep enough at night.

[Korin]

Doing okay but I think I’ve got a cold feeling a bit shivery.

[Rose76]

Still doing good. On a roll that is a record breaker in number of good days in a row.

[Toxie55]

I am okay - I have not seen T because of finances- I am afraid to talk
about jobs because she got the one I had wanted so I don't want to go
till I have a job and am financially able- I have always paid on time in cash
along with insurance , I am glad about that

[kaliope]

good job with budgeting Echoes. Since I have been stable I no longer gamble or go on shopping sprees so not only do i have enough to pay my bills each month, but i also have about 2000 dollars in savings. My greatest joy is that when i go to deposit my check each payday, i still have at least a couple hundred dollars in my account. it amazes me how much money i wasted.

i have to go to a bbq today. my social anxiety is attempting to blow it off, but my friend would be upset if i did not go. i am already a half hour late. im thinking i should wash and blow dry my hair at least so i can look nice. right now i just put it in a ponytail because i am not caring wht i look like but i am thinking i should care and it will only take ten more minutes to get my hair done. conflicted.

[crazycanbegood]

Originally Posted by ECHOES

I just worked out my budget for the rest of the year. That makes me feel very relieved because I know exactly where each pay is going so the anxiety about that is relieved.
I use an index card system. Each card is a payday. I write out on a separate sheet of paper what date of the month each bill is due and the amount. Then on each card, I list the bills that will be paid on that payday. I also include the remainder after bills so I can focus on that, and see that I DO have the ability to save if I am careful, frugal, and committed to saving. I want to save because there is power in having a savings, crises are fewer, choices are greater.

My T was away this week and it's been a nice break for a change. I don't feel like I'm 'white-knucling' it or repressing anger about her being gone like I have in the past. It's just a week we are going our own way and that's okay. I will be happy to see her next week and am looking forward to that

Hi Echoes, please organize my life for me too.

[WePow]

I made it through a working Sat. Now just to make it through on-call Sunday.
I will see my T Monday. That will be nice.