[healed84]

T got me into for a session today even though I wasn't scheduled. My panic was out of control this past weekend, and ended up going to the ER over something that I was panicked about. After that, I started to feel really low and depressed... I was sharing with T some of my thoughts. I said somehting in particular and T said.. "That is one of the most insane things I have heard in awhile and that is saying alot." I agreed, kind of. But, now I can't get those words out of my head. He admitted that he was really pushing me on purpose today, he was being tough. I know, he is trying to get me to realize some that I have some very negative, and destructive thoughts and standards, for myself. But- I can't tell if I am upset with those words, b/c I know it is true.. Or, if I am offended. Like, that is just not something you say to a client. I don't know.. I don't know if I am looking for an opinion or if I am just trying to work through the tough session and getting it out will help me process it.

You feel what you feel about. I can see it both ways maybe depending on how you two generally interact and depending on the context and tone of voice. I can totally see my T saying something like that in jest, a bit of kidding around. Just today he gave me permission to take off my shoe and throw it at him but he warned me he'd throw it back at me. He refers to the hospital as the (my pdoc's name) hotel. That kind of banter is normal for us, so if he said what your T said it probably wouldn't phase me.

However, if it was said more seriously by a T that I didn't feel that comfortable with, I might be really bothered by that remark.

So you'll have to think about it in context (something none of us here can do) to decide how it was intended and go from there.

[healed84]

Originally Posted by farmergirl

You feel what you feel about. I can see it both ways maybe depending on how you two generally interact and depending on the context and tone of voice. I can totally see my T saying something like that in jest, a bit of kidding around. Just today he gave me permission to take off my shoe and throw it at him but he warned me he'd throw it back at me. He refers to the hospital as the (my pdoc's name) hotel. That kind of banter is normal for us, so if he said what your T said it probably wouldn't phase me.

However, if it was said more seriously by a T that I didn't feel that comfortable with, I might be really bothered by that remark.

So you'll have to think about it in context (something none of us here can do) to decide how it was intended and go from there.

Well, in general we are both really good at keeping things light hearted even when we are talking about heavy topics. So, I do know we feel comfortable with banter, stuff said in jest. I know that he was serious when he said that... I think probably, that is why it is bothering me. Soemtimes, I guess it just helps to get out.. and process it with somebody else.

[elliemay]

Well, perhaps one thing to consider is that he didn't say "YOU are the most insane..."

He was referring to a thought in your head. It's a whole different thing.

I don't know about you, but I will readily admit that some of the thoughts I have in my head are, in fact, utterly insane. I also sometimes don't even realize how skewed they actually are until someone, usually my therapist, points them out to me.

I know it can hurt to hear it. No one wants to hear that their thoughts are insane. As your therapist indicated though, sometimes a push can help us wake up and see things in a wholly different light.

I mean, that's kinda why we go to therapy right? maybe?

[mixedup_emotions]

I remember, one time, T tried to push me - and ended up saying something very hurtful to me. At our next session, I confronted him on it - and he then shared his feelings with me...that he was afraid and worried for me. That made such a big difference for me.

I hope you decide to talk to T about it. Although it seems to me that he was trying to help you see that thoughts aren't rational, etc., it seemed that he judged the thoughts instead of sharing how he felt about them - which may have been more impactful to you.

my t sometimes pushes me and in the long run it does really help me to clear my thoughts, makes me work harder but it can leave you doubtful and questioning. I agree with others here, talking to your T about this can be beneficial!

hugs

[Puzzle_]

I would suggest speak with your T about your confusion about what was said! I know this is sort of the "dreaded advice" but this is what therapy is all about. Therapy is about sorting out what seems to be "un-sortable" (I realize that is not a word )
But, many times I have been confused, and my therapist thinks I am fine and completely understood everything. Until of course, I come back and explain my confusion and my T goes "Oh I didnt mean it this way", or "I meant ...."
Remember, Therapists are human, and are not us, they cannot , however much we may want them to, step into our mind and know why things hurt or trigger us. we are there to tell them

and pushing means they care.....which is really nice. Pushing can cause, confusion, realization of things..lots of other things Just speak with your T

Hope this encourages you to speak with your therapist

Puzzle_ Puzzle_

[WikidPissah]

that statement would replay in my head for weeks. unfortunately the only plausible answer is to ask T what he meant. of course the asking is almost as bad as the replaying, except for it has an end (the explanation).