we are only able to see our counselor once every 2 weeks and the time in between is almost unbearable sometimes. she has encouraged us to find and/or make new,outside support systems and we are trying our best to do that. we recently started attending celebrate recovery meetings in hopes of maybe connecting with someone,anyone we could relate to but so far nothing. she allows as many emails in between that we want and we have a private,online journal we write in and she leaves us feedback but as we are sure most everyone knows it just doesnt take the place of f2f interaction. the loneliness keeps growing and its becoming near debilitating. we try coming here but feel like what we have to say is ,for the most part,just downright idiotic and stupid. we try hard to combat the depression by doing activities in our room. certain life situations seem to be making us lose hope they might ever change. sometimes we cant even read posts because-and we are deeply ashamed of this-we find ourselves envious of those who can see their counselors once or even more times a week. we know we shouldnt feel that way but sometimes we still do. we are very sorry. anyway not totally sure what we are needing but thanks for letting us talk♥♥♥♥♥♥♥

[Sannah]

Trinity, I am so sorry you are sad. Maybe the recovery group will lead to some RL support, things take time. We are here for you...

Originally Posted by TrinityDancer

we try coming here but feel like what we have to say is ,for the most part,just downright idiotic and stupid.

I, for one, have never thought that anything you've said was stupid at all. I like your posts.

Originally Posted by TrinityDancer

sometimes we cant even read posts because-and we are deeply ashamed of this-we find ourselves envious of those who can see their counselors once or even more times a week.

There is a Swedish saying that translates to "I'm envious but I don't begrudge you". Envy is a feeling, it's not something we can control - and it's perfectly possible to be envious of something while still being happy for the people who do get this something we'd also like. If you were to write a constant stream angry rants in order to destroy other people's relationships with their Ts, that would be a different thing, but that's not what you are doing, quite the contrary, you are one of the most supportive people around.

I'm very sad that things are so difficult for you. Thank you for reaching out to us here.

[WikidPissah]

(((TD))) I always like to hear what you have to say. so pleas don't stop posting. Sorry if other T relationships trigger you, I get jealous at times to, I think it's natural.

[lostmyway21]

Originally Posted by WikidPissah

(((TD))) I always like to hear what you have to say. so pleas don't stop posting. Sorry if other T relationships trigger you, I get jealous at times to, I think it's natural.

I totally agree! ((TD))

Hang in there, Trinity. It's just a matter of time until you find someone to connect with in your regular life. You are doing a great thing in trying new things and new places to try to meet people. I have been there and appreciate how difficult it is and the courage it takes to keep putting yourself out there. You are going to get tired of the effort that it takes sometimes. At those times, just give yourself credit that you are trying, take a short break to regroup and then keep trying. You're amazing. At some point, you're going to meet the right person/people who will see that.

[pbutton]

Trinity, I like your posts. I always click to read when I see your name. I am glad you are here.

Iam sorry its so hard! I understand. I wish you didnt feel so alone. There are many people here who care

thanks so very much everyone! we are thinking of maybe printing out the replies so we can take them with us and read them when we start feeling hopeless. you all mean a lot to us♥♥♥♥♥♥♥

[SpiritRunner]

I want to say I always appreciate your posts so much too, trinity. There's always compassion and real care in what you post. You are supportive of others and are helpful and valuable here and very much wanted and cared for.
I wish you could see your counselor more often. Is there a really good reason it's not possible to see her once a week? I am glad though that you have the journal and the email privileges; I'm sure that does help, even if it's not as nice as face to face.

Oh, and here's another cool thing I've noticed about you, Trinity. Even when I know from threads that you have posted that you have your own horrible stuff to deal with, you still take time to support others and try to help. I think that's awesome and it's one of the things I love about you.

Originally Posted by TrinityDancer

we are only able to see our counselor once every 2 weeks and the time in between is almost unbearable sometimes. she has encouraged us to find and/or make new,outside support systems and we are trying our best to do that. we recently started attending celebrate recovery meetings in hopes of maybe connecting with someone,anyone we could relate to but so far nothing. she allows as many emails in between that we want and we have a private,online journal we write in and she leaves us feedback but as we are sure most everyone knows it just doesnt take the place of f2f interaction. the loneliness keeps growing and its becoming near debilitating. we try coming here but feel like what we have to say is ,for the most part,just downright idiotic and stupid. we try hard to combat the depression by doing activities in our room. certain life situations seem to be making us lose hope they might ever change. sometimes we cant even read posts because-and we are deeply ashamed of this-we find ourselves envious of those who can see their counselors once or even more times a week. we know we shouldnt feel that way but sometimes we still do. we are very sorry. anyway not totally sure what we are needing but thanks for letting us talk♥♥♥♥♥♥♥

(((Trinity))) no matter what you need, we are here. Please never think what you have to say is idiotic. Far from it! Keep talking to us, please.

Originally Posted by My kids are cool

Oh, and here's another cool thing I've noticed about you, Trinity. Even when I know from threads that you have posted that you have your own horrible stuff to deal with, you still take time to support others and try to help. I think that's awesome and it's one of the things I love about you.

That is so true! I've noticed that also. You're the best (((Trinity)))

Originally Posted by SpiritRunner

I want to say I always appreciate your posts so much too, trinity. There's always compassion and real care in what you post. You are supportive of others and are helpful and valuable here and very much wanted and cared for.
I wish you could see your counselor more often. Is there a really good reason it's not possible to see her once a week? I am glad though that you have the journal and the email privileges; I'm sure that does help, even if it's not as nice as face to face.

the reason we dont see her more often yet is because originally she told us she couldnt take us on as she was already beyond her capacity for SRA clients but she does work at a church every other week and sees us there for a few hours. she doesnt charge us anything and we are very grateful. she knows we need weekly if not more and said she has us in mind when an opening comes along but that doesnt make it any easier

Originally Posted by My kids are cool

Oh, and here's another cool thing I've noticed about you, Trinity. Even when I know from threads that you have posted that you have your own horrible stuff to deal with, you still take time to support others and try to help. I think that's awesome and it's one of the things I love about you.

thank you so much MKAC-this almost made us cry!♥

((((calista)))) thank you♥♥♥ we didnt realize that others dont see us as we see ourselves.

[likelife]

That sounds so difficult, Trinity. Definitely feel more than welcome to post here!

Originally Posted by My kids are cool

Oh, and here's another cool thing I've noticed about you, Trinity. Even when I know from threads that you have posted that you have your own horrible stuff to deal with, you still take time to support others and try to help. I think that's awesome and it's one of the things I love about you.

I've thought about this, too, often.

[pbutton]

Originally Posted by My kids are cool

Oh, and here's another cool thing I've noticed about you, Trinity. Even when I know from threads that you have posted that you have your own horrible stuff to deal with, you still take time to support others and try to help. I think that's awesome and it's one of the things I love about you.

Yes! This! Very much this.

just cant shake lonely

[rainbow_rose]

i'm here too - and i'm glad you are too. i love the little hearts you put in your posts. they make me smile.

[stopdog]

You are not alone here.

Originally Posted by stopdog

You are not alone here.

yes this is true-just worried we might wear out our welcome if we post too much♥

[Chopin99]

Originally Posted by TrinityDancer

yes this is true-just worried we might wear out our welcome if we post too much♥

I don't think that could ever happen, Trinity! I have also seen your kind and caring spirit shine through your posts. You are definitely not alone here. It is obvious you are loved!