I understand but don't understand...

I've been with my T 8 years...I have BPD and for years adored her...It was beaten in my head (not physically but verbally) that my T was no different then hiring a plumber or electrician etc. that she was doing a job...If I had tried to leave therapy a year ago, it would of devastated me but since this "beating" I could terminate Tues. and walk away and never look back...It breaks my heart to hear the pain that people go through here it was where I once was too but now I'm glad I'm where I'm at, there;s no connection, no pain...Don't mean to offend, just my thoughts...JB

Welcome to psychcentral JFB.

Yes, I agree with the fact that your T is hired by you as a consultant (though you do the work.)

But with a T there is a relationship built up. Yes, you might use the same electrician for 8 years and know them better than you know a T, but you might still miss the connection if they or you left, imo.

I, too, feel for those who are suffering through changing Ts. I expect to continue with mine for the rest of my, or his, life. Then I don't know what I'll do.

Again, welcome!

Lately I have wondered about this. Does therapy go through different stages, one being when you think the world of your therapist and you could never live without him, but then after time, you begin to stand on your own and begin to see the therapist as just a consultant type?

I know I worry that I will never get to the stage where I feel totally comfortable to end therapy.....that scares me....

Oh yes, therapy goes through stages, as does the therapy relationship goes through stages. The stages aren't mutually exclusive. You can also revisit a stage even though you have gone through it before. Try not to worry about things in the future... you'll be ready for it when it comes at the right time imo.

Thanks Sky....