T today - a step

For those of you who have been following my saga with my T, and being so supportive and helpful, I wanted to give a bit of an update.

I saw T today and I could tell he kind of had an agenda. It scared me so I talked about something else for a while, but finally I was ready to talk about the hard stuff that's been going on lately.

Long story short, he TOLD ME some things I really needed to know and didn't know. And it was scary and a huge relief...huge...because I don't have to guess anymore. I *think* it was the biggest step we've take TOGETHER in a long long time.

What he told me brought up all kinds of other stuff, but at least now we can deal with what we're dealing with and not talk around it.

He didn't feel icky when we hugged at the end. He felt safe. I asked him during the hug about the difference between now and when I was little, and he put words around it for me that helped. He believes me, and we're going to figure this out together.

THAT is not like being little.

So, I left and didn't slam the door.

I've had way too many benzos, actually, because it's all pretty stressful and spirally and unravelling. But still better. A step closer to each other, for sure.

Very very very good. Very very very good indeed. You are so strong and so brave to keep walking.

Peace to you.

I'm glad to hear things felt better today. That is good news.

((((((((((((Nightsky)))))))))))

I am so glad that you are feeling better today.

That is so great, nightsky! I am so happy for you.

this is great to hear, nightsky

Wonderful....steps in the right direction

I am so happy to read your post. It is so hopeful !

That's wonderful, Nightsky. You're very brave and strong.

I am glad it was a better appointment for you than the last one.

Thank you, Nightsky, for posting this. Your T is a wonder, and has done so much good work with you (and vice versa). I'm glad to hear that you're still working together.

one step at a time, yes?

I think what's discouraging and scary is that I'm begin accused of something that I DID NOT do. I know T believes me, I KNOW he does, and I find the whole thing upsetting and confusing.

But T keeps telling me "this is a problem right now, and we're working together to figure it out. You and me." I keep hanging onto that. T and me. Working together.

Finally.

this is great but sorry it is leaving you feeling so spiraly

I can understand how triggering that is! ugggs. You are doing GREAT with all of this!!!

Hi,
I haven't been following your story with your therapist. But I wanted to say that I support you in what you're going through. It sounds like you two did some important and hard work today and that's great! Keep writing.