[Wren_]

Something I was reading recently ... maybe a therapists blog or book about therapy, made mention that not many clients thank their therapists after a session or show gratitude for the work done.

It's something I've always done and can't imagine not doing because I appreciate their time and work even if it's been a horrible session as far as being an emotional nightmare.

I know I'm definitely and genuinely thankful for my T's. Then I started thinking though that even in talking to a "bad" T in the past I thanked him at the end of the session even though it was terrible. I'm not sure why I thanked him

[pbutton]

Not every session, no. I do when he points out something that I hadn't realized on my own. I like to reward the behavior that I appreciate. Teach him how to therapize me properly.

[autotelica]

Occasionally I realize I've taken her for granted. Like, recently her receptionist informed me that I had a standing appointment till the rest of the year, and I just said "OK" and hung up the phone. But then I remembered how it used to be when my appointments were doled out in handfuls, erratically spaced. So lately I have been telling my therapist how grateful I am that she continues to work with me.

I thank him on a regular basis, so he knows how important he is to me and my healing...plus it's just my nature.

I don't thank him every single session, but I thank him a lot in the emails I send him and tell him how grateful I am for him and how much he is helping me. I tell him I love him and that I miss him a lot too. And that I am grateful he's in my life. He's very caring, considerate, and conscientious. One time I told him I didn't want to cry in session because the tissues he had would come apart and when I would leave I would have bits of tissue all over my face and feel really silly....today he had new tissues that didn't do that! I thanked him for that .

I can imagine a T that isn't very good would not be appreciated much.

[critterlady]

I almost always at least thank him at the end of a session, as I'm leaving. If he says something particularly helpful or touching, I thank him right at the time.

[rainbow_rose]

in my last session, i took a moment to express my appreciation of her and her work with me. but there are some things that are beyond words ... i do have a plan for that, tho. :-)

I thank her every session as I'm leaving, and sometimes several times while we're talking. It's just the way I am too. I hope it comes across as heart-felt as it always is. My t has helped me SO much since I started seeing her!!!

[healed84]

I do tend to say thank you at the end of most of our sessions.

[Wren_]

I wonder where all the unthankful clients are then, hmm! interesting that they said that ...

rainbow rose, you have me curious about your plan

I do not always thank her because when I leave I do not always feel thankful for what has taken place. I wish I could say I was grateful all the time - but I'm not. I thank her when something we've done was helpful. Otherwise I just say "Right, see you next week"...

[Wren_]

how about on the flip side stormyangels, are you thanked?

[CantExplain]

Yes, I thank my T at the end of most sessions.

[stopdog]

No. I pay her. She is not doing me a favor, she is doing her job.

I do thank her if she does something I ask her for like paperwork needing to be done a certain way.

[CantExplain]

Originally Posted by tigergirl

I wonder where all the unthankful clients are then, hmm! interesting that they said that ...

rainbow rose, you have me curious about your plan

Those of us here on PC are the more committed bunch.

[CantExplain]

Originally Posted by stopdog

No. I pay her. She is not doing me a favor, she is doing her job.

I do thank her if she does something I ask her for like paperwork needing to be done a certain way.

Don't you say thanks to the person who serves you when you buy something retail?

Originally Posted by tigergirl

how about on the flip side stormyangels, are you thanked?

I think my answer would be the same on the flip side. I am thanked when I am helpful. I know there are some days it's just a brutal session and I've pissed off my client, maybe out of necessity, but still... I don't expected to be thanked in the moment. Or days that I just KNOW that I've been off and not on my game. I think for me, I do like the genuine "thanks, we did good today". While any over all thanks is appreciated, there are days that I'm thinking "Ooh I'm sure there's a few other words you'd rather say right now"

[Wren_]

"Ooh I'm sure there's a few other words you'd rather say right now"

i'm sure that's definitely true ... thanks for the flip side view

[stopdog]

Originally Posted by CantExplain

Don't you say thanks to the person who serves you when you buy something retail?

No. Not usually.

I don't fully understand why anyone would thank the therapist for simply doing their job. I am not particularly enamoured of her nor the fact she is not completely inadequate or incompetent at her job. I am even less clear about why I would thank the therapist for something "we" did together. I pay her for her part in the situation.

I always send my T a text, well my old T and say thanks after a session...of course she never answers but I like her to know she is apppreciated for her hard work.

[stopdog]

Seriously, this whole concept just boggles me.
I don't get it when people thank me for doing my job. I kind of find it insulting.

[pbutton]

I have to say thanks for this thread. It made me pull the trigger and send T1 a final thank you & a copy of my ziplining photo. He helped make that possible, he should get to bask in all of my dangling helmeted glory.

[Wren_]

t2 thanks me as well which i used to find amazing and now find really helpful; not for the payment but for my part in doing the work

[critterlady]

I've always figured that I appreciate it when people thank me for doing things, even those things for which I was compensated. So, if I can pay that forward to others, what does it cost me? I thank people in retail, servers in restaurants, all kinds of people who are doing their job. It's a courtesy. I think the more courteous we are, the fewer surly people there will be in the world.

I don't think of my T as being the same as a waiter, though. I thank him because I truly believe that he very often goes above and beyond just his job. I pay him for his time, his caring for me is extra and I'm thankful for it.

[stopdog]

Originally Posted by tigergirl

t2 thanks me as well which i used to find amazing and now find really helpful; not for the payment but for my part in doing the work

Why? Do you know? This would make me want to kill the therapist. They have no place thanking me for doing therapy.
I find this thread fascinating and awful at the same time (my responses -that you all do it is not being criticized. I am just surprised at how I am feeling about it)?

I understand general politeness or cordiality, but that does not seem to be what is being described on here. I am not generally impolite to the the woman. Just not understanding where the gratefulness thing is coming from.