Couch 19

The kids we at a special... Now they have playtime and all my work is done.

Thanks granite, but I am still being a big whiny baby in my head, going, "I cannnnnn't. I cannnn't. I'll sound stuuuuupid."

MKAC - is this the time for tough love?
Look - you are unhappy and anxious etc. because he did not call AND you are afraid to call him to get reassurance because you think you will look stupid. You have ability (your adult self) to end the anxiety and be reassured. Which is worse for you-the scared abandoned part or the I might look stupid part? Screw your courage to the sticking place and call the guy. Let yourself do something that will help you feel better.

Now I am off to paint finger puppets for next week's therapy production.

MKAC - if too tough - then disregard.

MKAC...just do it. Call. Feeling needy is less torment than feeling unloved.

Stopdog:

Here's your skit:

While this little piggie (wiggle finger) was expressing herself the big bad wolf (wiggle finger) came by and misinterpreted what she was saying. So this other little piggie (wiggle finger) came in and explained it. But big bad wolf (wiggle finger) still didn't have a clue, so the last little piggie (wiggle finger) kicked big bad wolf's (wiggle finger) face in(kick T in the face).

My interaction to the therapist is like this right now:

SD: I thought Smith made a good play last night when he got the guy out on a pop fly - I wish I could play like that.(or something about my feelings)
Therapist: Lichen grow on the north side of trees.
SD: What do lichen have to do with baseball? Why are you talking about lichen?
Therapist: I can't answer that. I don't know.

If my T misunderstood me this much, I would want to kill her.

I know you miss her when you quit stopdog, but really, she sounds like an idiot. You may have a soft spot in your heart for idiots, (as evidenced by the fact that you are nice to me ), but it may be time to cut your losses with this T.

ugh. Wear steel toed boots.

Parts Therapy is like the "who's on first" skit.

SD , ok I'm referring to the this T as Random T....wtf? Is she hi?

T: so can I speak to the part that feels they are on first?
W: Who's on first?
T: No, who is on 2nd, but we aren't speaking to him now. What's first got to say?
W: I don't know.
T: Well, i don't know is way the hell over on third, we need to speak with first.

OK, I've been lurking around, but I had to log in for this...



wikid.

Ah - but the two times I actually felt heard by her in the past 28 months were great. I keep wanting to feel that way again.

((lola)) How was T?

MKAC, if he doesn't call soon, call him....we need not fabricate unnecessary anxiety, we have plenty of that to go around. No self deprecation on the couch either...i think its a rule.

Wiki - drop the parts chick , its like a priest trying to convince a Rabbi that Jesus was the son of god... its not happening, unless your willing to entertain it.

Yikes.

And yikes again.

I gotta say, to my ears it sounds like you would both be better off cutting your losses.

That does make it harder. Can you return to whatever it was you were talking about then, and move from there?

T was good, just confirmed what I've known since I started this process...that my relationship may not withstand the changes in me... but Im determined not to let that deter me from taking care of me... so hard, just so hard... I'm good though, Thank you. More concerned for my fellow couchers.

mkac... that anxious waiting SUCKS. I think the advice that you do the calling thing yourself is good.

lola, I hope you had a good session today. [ETA: simulposted!]

Good plan - it may be hard but you can do it and are worth it.

SD what were those 2 subjects? Not that you have to share, but i would be curious as to what they related to... is she little SD's favorite T?

You are not an idiot.
And I actually don't think she is either - she may be a bit ch but not an idiot.
She keeps telling me she is not mean.

I don't really think it was the subject matter - it was more that she just listened and said she understood and quit talking.

seriously MKAC, your not an idiot...cause if you are ( being one of the couch counsel ) then I would have to be a moron ( as one of the couch jokers) and im not a moron.

If he doesn't call around noon, I'll call him. Just need to be a grownup about this, right? Stopdog, I get that feeling. There was a period of time (about ten years maybe) when my mother was in remission or something from her mental illness. After my younger sister moved in with them (about six years ago now), she totally relapsed. However, it felt SO GOOD to sort of have a mother for those ten years that I have difficulty just cutting off contact now, even after six years of steadily worsening behavior from her. I totally get those little bits of understanding, especially when they come so infrequently and at such a high emotional cost seem AMAZING and it's hard to then leave the relationship. In dogs, studies show that intermittent reinforcement is the best way to really set the desired behavior.