Pointless..

Hey all - Hope everyone is good, so I dunno if some of you will remember my previous thread..

This morning I saw my T, I revealed something relatively big to him, something that was stupidly hard to say but I said it, I didn't want to but it was to help him understand the reason behind some of my problems and also because I felt it was a major problem that needed to be explored.

He handled it sort of well in a way of not overreacting etc, then it went downhill...

As the session went on, I felt he didn't understand/misunderstood what I had said and fair enough I acknowledge he doesn't know everything, but it just felt like such a pointless session, he was making presumptions and was asking me if he was correct and the majority of them were wrong, I began to feel frustrated towards the end, which I think he could see..

To top if off, he ended the session rather abruptly with a deep question, where I responded then he said "ok its 11AM, sessions over, do you want to see me next week?" Like mad hurrying me out of his office.. -___-

Maybe my problems are too much for my T? He said he had no experience of this problem so feels out of his depth which is why he was asking me like a million questions..

Like how do you know if your incompatible with your T? I'm beginning to feel that I am.. This is like my 6th/7th sesh with him.. *sigh*

Wow, I feel you on this one. I'll wait for the pros here to respond but I can empathize with you.

I also empathize...mine is nice but not sure he gets me (after 2.5 years, sheesh) so I'll see what the pros say, too. Hello, pros?

Is your T willing to learn with you about this issue? Do you trust your T enough to learn with you? Not all T's are equal in experience and someone has to be the first, but IMO it's a conversation ya'll should have.

OUCH!!!

I would definitely talk to him and tell him how you felt. I would tell him that his responses made things more difficult for you. If he is open to this, and responds in a helpful way, well, that would be the goal. If you still feel like he doesn't understand you, you might want to interview a few Ts to see if there is a better fit. Keep us posted!

These are EXCELLENT questions that get to the heart of the T relationship.

ouch!!

Oski
T's clumsiness aside

if you wonder whether he is out of his area of expertise with your issues... better to ask him now. Don't be surprised if he refers you - he is ethically obliged to offer to do that - but better for him to refer you before you become attached.

That happened with me and T1, but I refused to leave and although she did a lot with me, the day came when we could go no farther together & it was very hard for me to hear THEN, I can't help you any more. Wow it made me feel like such a hopeless case.

I couldn't have known this at the time, but if I had changed at the outset, to the T I have now, I am fairly sure I'd be 'done' now.
good luck

Thanks for the replies guys, sorry for the late response - Been snowed under with exams.

All the replies made sense, and I do need to find out if my T is willing to learn about the issue, I did feel interrogated though when he was asking.. *sigh* why is therapy so complicated.

Man it sucks to finally talk about such a big issue for this to happen, i've partially lost faith in the process as a result on reflection..

I decided to take a therapy break anyway, a minor one.. just a week for now but...maybe two.. to collect my thoughts and be away from my T. Thanks again for the replies, really appreciated.

Thanks for the reply - Definitely going to do this, would rather know now if he can help me rather than being told down the line that he can't go any further with me. Thanks again.

Thanks for the reply - Will definitely do this if I do get round to seeing him again and will keep everyone posted.

If you can, it's probably better if you can go back rather than take a break right now. Let your T know how you felt and ask the questions lola suggested about if your T is willing to learn with you; it's a big issue as you said and worth you getting support and help for. The rush part is a horrible way to end things; sorry that was such a rough ending to an already difficult session