I know this sounds confusing but try to figure it out for me

After being online here for sometime I am trying to psycoanalize what it is that makes people tick. I have read some of the posts and realize there are alot of people dealing with alot of issues. My reasons for going online started because of issues with my family. My exhusband, parents, etc. I just couldn't figure out why I was so miserable and they just pointed it back to me. I make myself miserable. My parents were workaholics as well as my husband. They wanted me to encourage that as well as support their doing so. I tried believing that work was necessary to maintain a family. I still believe work is neccessary but I am see their aholic behavior is what stopped us from being family. My parents are retired but now insist that they aren't okay with being close to me still. They are anxious to treat themselves after years of hard work. Which they treat themselves very well. I just feel lost in that I still don't feel comfortable being a support person but never being supported except financially myself. Emotionally I have been seeking God, counseling, everything. I don't have family which is what I thought was right. Now I wonder if this needs to be adjusted for good in my mind and realize family is just a figment of my imagination. What would you do.

im not sure how to answer the question. I think that is is ideal to have the support of family. Sometimes things don't happen like that. I'm sorry your family isn't the support you need right now.

I think you are on the right path. Family is never what we "wish" it to be...or it wouldn't be "family." imo Since you are all adults now, it's time to make your own choices. Be thankful for their financial support, and realize that you, too, have to find your own life that you can live happily. It should never be based upon others. Knowing yourself first, and being satisfied with your path, first, then finding others to accent that life, imo, in what counts. TC!

The only strength I have ever found was in God. He is faithful... He will never forsake you.

My family is nothing like I had learned to pretend it was. so I have been dealing with the illusion of a family being shattered ... which strengthened my faith in God.

He is the same today as He was yesterday.. and He will be the same tomorrow as He is today....unlike the earthly family I thought I had.

Hang in there.. you will find your way...

I suspect the key is your mention of alcohol. When used to excess, alcohol is serving as a coping mechanism... in that it is seen by the system as a threat, and considerable consciousness must be diverted to insure that it gets processed out of the system without damaging the brain and other organs too much. This diversion serves to reduce ones awareness of ones pain, fear, and other emotions which one does not want to deal with.

The person who uses alcohol to excess does so on orders to his/her bran from his/her MIND, as the means by which his/her MIND keeps him/her unaware of what it is repressing within itself. When ever the anxiety generated by such repression becomes more than one can easily ignore, ones MIND initiates its Defense Mechanism, D-M, and thoughts of needing a "drink of alcohol" are sent to ones brain.... including the supporting thoughts which rationalize, justify, and excuse doing so.

As a child, your MIND "learned" to accomodate the programming of the parent's MINDs... and did so to insure that you would not be abandoned [this was before three years of age]. The enabling tendency is the result... wherein you find it difficult to simply walk away from the situation.