[A Red Panda]

Hey,

I was just wondering what it's like when you're first starting therapy or with a new therapist? I've only just recently started in on this, after avoiding it for a decade.... and I'm just not really sure what to be expecting or anything.

To such an extent apparently that I can't really formulate the question I'm trying to ask!

Are you asking what the first session was like? More or less just introductory. Getting to know you kind of stuff. Nothing terribly deep, but deep enough that I remember telling my husband that this T really "got" me right away.

Remember, it starts fairly slow while you settle into each other's style and begin to slowly reveal why you are there. I found the first few sessions the easiest because it took a bit to really delve into the tough stuff.

[A Red Panda]

Yeah, see, I've found the first two to be really quite difficult as we've hit onto various sensitive topics already. I guess I just don't really know what to expect as I've been pretty resistant to it.

[sunrise]

I found the first few months to be really intense. I thought about therapy a lot even when I wasn't there. Things moved quickly inside of me. Lots was stirred up. We did trauma work. This was with my second therapist. With my first therapist, it was different. I just tried to force myself to go as it relieved some anxiety to "do something" to deal with my problems. So it really depends on where you are at in your journey and what the other person is like (the T). Lots of variables. Good luck. Hope you enjoy! And find therapy helpful...

[Victoria'smom]

First couple of times we went over intake notes, mental history, my goals, and family dynamic. The next couple of sessions were her trying to pry information from me. Eventually t found a way for me to tell her what she should know and me not stress that she'll hospitalize me or insist on intensive out patient. For the most part I participate even though it's probably like herding cats trying to talk/help me.

i just started with a new T, but i havent seen that many.

mostly we just talk and T tries to help almost "stabilize" me, cause i am really depressed.
in some cases, T is giving me advice, but i need it at this time because i am not really functioning that great. its not like life changing advice, just things to help me function.

T started taking my history, but eventually stopped because it was upsetting to me but we will get back to it or it comes up as we talk about other things.

honestly, it doesnt feel like there is anything that "has to be done."
T is just being really helpful right now for me... i am much much younger than T so i kind of feel that T is modeling self care and also taking "care of me" and stuff right now.

[feralkittymom]

While there may be some features common to a first session, I'm not sure the first stage of therapy is the same for anyone. Too many variables. Usually you can't go wrong by just following whatever feeling is present in the room in the moment.

For me, the first stage was pretty intense, but slow. A lot of pent up emotions needing to be expressed, a certain amount of crisis, all complicated by depression.

[Perna]

I remember being confused and over focused. There's so much to take in and I was so scared it was like having tunnel vision. I still remember my first session and I thought I was going to be okay and he says, just before I was leaving, "You haven't mentioned your father." I mean, how can you "forget" a major person in your life?

[stopdog]

Awful. Just plain awful.

[growlithing]

I remember visibly shaking a lot and lying a lot. I was extremely nervous and scared that my parents would find out I was seeing someone. It took nearly two months reassurance that wouldn't happen. It took me about a year and a half to even consider not pushing my T away when she tries to talk about anything remotely emotionally intimate. I'm still in that place right now.

[tinyrabbit]

My T started the first session by asking what brought me there. He didn't push me to disclose anything or make me feel pressurised to talk.

He annoyed the heck out of me at first because I wanted to know 'the rules' and he wouldn't tell me what was supposed to happen, how therapy was supposed to work or what I was 'meant' to do. I felt like he was refusing to help me.

Seven months down the line, I have a different perspective. I think he stayed very 'blank slate' about how therapy was 'supposed' to work because everyone needs something different from it. I seem to have spent a lot of my therapy time living out a teenage rebellion I couldn't have at the time.

My T never told me what was or wasn't supposed to happen in the room, other than saying I didn't have to do anything except show up, so I just went ahead and did what I needed to do. It just sort of happened.

So now I'll say that, when you first start therapy, what you're doing is forming a connection, or a relationship (though not everyone likes to call it that), with your T, and seeing what comes out of that.

[Seshat]

It might be somewhat confusing, uncomfortable, and dissapointing at first, even if you're starting with a good T.

[A Red Panda]

Thanks everyone! It was actually pretty reassuring to read about others feeling sorta resistant to it. So far I've pretty much just been in a whirlwind with it, because things that I have relatively "dealt with" he brings up. Like... I can go on with my life pretty normally, but I don't particularly like thinking about or talking about a lot of my past. He hit on a pretty big trigger the first time I was there - I don't blame him for it cause how was he to know? but it doesn't help with the fact that I feel sorta angry going in as I don't want to be going. I know that I made the CHOICE to go, but I chose to go mostly because the GP was pressuring me to go and that I had to go through Mental Health to even get an appointment with the pdoc, and my T was in my intake consultation with the pdoc so I figure he's already heard it so why not keep going.. and the the pdoc basically also assumed that I would have to continue with the T. So... off I went. I'm giving it my all but I just sorta feel like a failure cause the things my T has asked me to try just tend to p*** me off.

To the extent that for my second meeting I went in with an organized binder with all the stuff he'd gave me and asked me to do. Including a page where I wrote down all my goals, which he hadn't really seemed to accept as a goal the first time. I sorta had some rather passive-aggressive subheadings... I didn't mean to be a b**** about it, but they were the only headings I could really think of. And like... I'm not really an angry person. But I just feel frustrated and angry about going to these appointments!