Couch 58 A place to sit and......

Yes. Yes you do.

The children's hospital I took my daughter to see recommended that all kids in the clinic see a counselor of some type for the stress and issues around having a chronic illness and to learn relaxation techniques. They gave me a list of people and of the seven, I ruled out three because they are listed as "Christian counselors" and no offense to anyone's religion (I consider myself Christian), most Christian counselors I have heard of or talked to anyone around here about have been completely useless. So, of the four left on the list, I didn't like the web sites of two of them and the other two just had phone numbers. Of those two, one called me back and even called me at 9 the same night, so I scheduled an appointment. BUT THEN, I was looking her up on Health Grades and she has only one review and the rating is REALLY low. I'm a little worried now. Just for comparison purposes, I checked my T (he has no ratings at all on one site and all 5s on another). My husband's former T, who according to my H was totally useless (and I agree), had a 4.8 average with 5 reviews.

I wish you would make something like this, Wikid:

omg...MKAC, that's beautiful. I am not good with a horse form (I've never been around them)..but hmmmm.

As far as your daughter...mine went to therapy for a while. She wanted a woman, so we got her one. She helped a bit. Her doc helped more by giving her a very low dose of lexipro for the anxiety she was experiencing. (worrying about falling behind in school and such). I think it's awesome that you are being so pro-active with her. I wouldn't worry about those site grades too much...unfortunately people who get pissy like to complain. Usually it's overly excited people who grade (really happy or really pissed), I have found the grades somewhat useless. Your daughter will be able to tell if the person can help her in a few weeks.

Packed a bunch of my stuff an left my house... H had nothing to day. Started driving and freaked out. I don't hav friends to stay with and really shouldn't be spending money on a hotel stay not should I be alone in a hotel room feeling like this. Called t left a message that I NEEDED him to call me back before he left the office. Drove to a park in the city thy my t is in and sat there. T called back told him what was going on. He reminded me that I maybe overwhelmed by emotions not only from marriage stuff but from the stirring up of stuff after visiting the site of the trauma. He asked me to please not be alone tonight and to assure my safety. He wanted me to either go back home, or to a friends. I have no friends to go to... So, I said I would go home. T assured me I could call him tonight if I need. I am not ready to go home yet. Stopped to eat some dinner and may walk around the mall or something.

((healed)) Can you spend the night with a family member? This isn't the best way to do this. You need to find a place to go before you leave. I am so sorry that you are in so much pain. Please call your t again if you need to. I hope that you can find safety and peace for tonight. Wish you lived closer.

Last time I looked, Madame T had only one review, and that was mine. If I had been in a vindictive mood, I would have written her a bad review.

Therapy is very personal. I don't think that another person's experience tells you very much.

Bottom line: a single review, good or bad, is pretty much worthless.

My grandmother is getting a mastectomy aug 22, then they suggest chemo... My day is suckin

Healed... I'm not an attorney but I know my friend was told from an attorney in my state which is not the same as yours that no matter what DO NOT leave your house and kids.

Go back home.... admit this is a horrible time for you to yourself if no one else ... see if your bff from another town can come back for the weekend and have her stay with you at your house... or see if you can set up play dates or babysitting for tomorrow if your H is going to be helping your inlaws remodel...

I'll be thinking and praying for you...

Healed...

I've been told by someone (whom at the time I wanted to gouge their eyes out) that depression is anger turned inwards... Have you ever told your H what you really really think about some of the stuff going on? Have your screamed and yelled and said all the horrible stuff you are thinking to him about it?

and how about the anger you feel towards the perps of the trauma.... have you screamed at the top of your lungs? taken kickboxing? beat the hell out of your pillow?

Idk... these are just some thoughts...I could just be projecting my stuff here... only you know what you are realling feeling but maybe you need to take your kids to your MIL and you two just have it out... (nothing physical of course just saying how you really feel)

Lola... I'm sorry to hear that...

but the drs have a plan so that is a positive thing... how old is your grandmother?

sorry I'm telling people what to do again....

guess I'm just wishing I could help

Healed, do you want custody of your kids? If so, you really need to listen to Ready and go back to the house. If not, please stay safe wherever you are tonight. Not giving you legal advice because I doubt I'm licensed in your state, but in our state, if you move out without the kids, you are basically abdicating custody to the other person, at least in the short term.

MKAC....why don't you ask your T for a recommendation? Maybe he knows of some that work with teenagers or who specialize in chronic illnesses

My T has horrible taste in other Ts. I asked him for a recommendation for Ts for H and D before. He recommended two Ts who didn't work out for H, and the one he recommended for D before was not a good fit. I thought she was patronizing and dismissive of D's feelings about how H treats her. D tried really hard to explain herself when meeting alone with the woman and then asked me to sit in and I tried to explain that IN REALITY H treats our son much differently than he treats D. When H went in for a session, though, the T still acted as if D was just overreacting, or as if she was seeing favoritism for our son where none existed. H presents VERY well and seems so nice that after meeting him, the T just didn't really believe D or me. D stopped going after that. So, this time I asked the hospital for recommendations for Ts that they have previously sent kids with this condition to.

MKAC...maybe you need to look at ALL the Ts and evaluate based on education level and experience... My xT for all his good and bad points has a psyd and has worked at a childrens hopsital a state run program and a state emntal hospital...so lots of experience...his using the label christian only started when he went into private practice... But i get you would want to understand their philosophy regarding chronic illness...some wont mention religion at all if that isnt an area you want to explore.

There aren't a whole lot of people that know how bad things are.. I really would like my family to stay in the dark with all of this for now.


Thanks, I have heard this before.. however I was not thinking right when I left.

These are all great ideas.. thank you. H knows how I feel as far as the marriage goes. He does not know a lot of what I feel or thinking when it comes to anxiety/depression/sui.. I am sure there is tons we could talk about.. We see MC on Monday.. hoping to be able to have some kind of helpful conversation with some mediation.

Thanks, MKAC.. I am home now. I won't leave again until I have some kind of plan in mind. Thanks for all the advice, all.. I really appreciate. For now, I am just gonna hang out in my room and try to make it through the weekend. I see MC on Monday and T on Tuesday.

Feeling a little sad. I called my wise friend who moved far away. It was good to talk to her but I miss her so much. She was teaching me how to cook and lots of things my mom never did.

Healed, you are in my thoughts. I'm glad you're safe.

MKAC, please don't read into a single review. The people who post reviews tend to be at the extremes - really happy with the T or really unhappy. A single review has a 50/50 chance of being bad. My pdoc has one really horrible review and a couple of really good ones. I really suspect that the one review came from a patient in the middle of a rupture, so her view is very likely heavily skewed.

My T's website is really lame. I'm glad I didn't see it before I met with him. I might have avoided going to him.

I managed to get a speedy appointment with a neurologist. One of the more experienced guys in the area had an unexpected cancellation and I happen to call at exactly the right time. I see him Tuesday. If he hadn't had the cancellation, it would have been 5 more weeks. I presume that my brain tumor is not of concern, but I'd rather get that from a neuro sooner rather than later.

((((Healed)))))

CL... I'm so glad you were able to get in so quickly. The waiting to get more info must be really really hard. Did they find it in response to your going to doctors for your marathon headache?

What animals did you work with today?

Hi Ike...what are you up to tonight?

Living among boxes. We move next week. We are hosting an exchange student from Tokyo and we picked her up from the airport last night. Hope you are doing well. Do you want me to send you some hot sauce from Bojangles? Or a biscuit?

They did. My doctor ordered an MRI to rule out structural brain problems as the cause of my headaches. I really wasn't expecting them to actually find one!

Today was laughing gull day. We got a bunch of them in with suspected botulism. Luckily, they're recovering nicely. I also got to work on a great egret that came in with a fish hook through his neck. Lucky for him, he was found by a vet who removed the hook, gave him supportive care and transferred him to our clinic. He had surgery today to repair the damage. He should be fine.

I'll take a biscuit! I didn't realize you were moving again. Is this to a house or another rental? How is your D and the exchange student getting along? Is she here for a few weeks or a whole semester?