[Morgansangel]

Went to T apt today. T is leaving. Tells me today. Also tells me if I want more T sessions I have to get referred again by Pdoc and waiting list is a year and I'd go to the back of the list.

I wouldn't be here in a year.

Why did I start to trust my T? Why bother just to get let down and left again. What did I do wrong? Why do people always leave me? Am I that awful?

Going to see local charity for advice but it looks like I'm going to have to borrow money and try find someone private

The mental health services in this country are a nightmare. 15 years for me to finally get in with a T and then they leave and I have to go back to the back of the waiting list because they leave? How is that fair?

That's awful. I have heard many NHS horror stories but this is just beyond belief. I'm so sorry this is happening to you.

[Lamplighter]

I'm so sorry this has happened to you - and if it's any consolation I'm really angry on your behalf, unfortunately knowing full well how easily the NHS system can mess with emotionally vulnerable people

Did your T explain why they were leaving? If nothing else, I would hope that they'd made it clear that it had nothing to do with you. I'm really so sorry, this is awful, and having to go on a waiting list again just sucks, can you not kick up a fuss about that because strictly speaking you shouldn't be shunted out of the system like that, you should have been transferred to someone else.

((((((( Morgansangel ))))))))

[noodlzzz]

Major hugs. As a fellow NHS user I feel your pain with waiting lists. I hope this charity works out. Did you watch failed by the NHS on BBC last week? There was a thing about waiting times and there are charities set up to provide psychotherapy for those waiting, not sure if this is the kind of charity you've already found but if not might be worth looking into.

[Asiablue]

The mental health system within the NHS is an absolute disgrace. Makes me so angry. The best thing i can suggest is to make a noise about this, put it all in writing because that needs to be taken more seriously since it needs to be formally recorded. Cite ethics and laws which are there to protect you. ( allegedly)
The service you are being offered is unfair, unethical and there is no continuity of care, if it was Cancer you were being treated for, it just wouldn't happen, so why is Mental health being treated this way? It all goes back to this old Victorian way of thinking that somehow mental health is a personality flaw, something that people have control over, that if you become mentally ill it's because you are weak or lazy or stupid and as a result funds are not reaching these services, they are not seen as a priority.

You haven't done anything wrong, you have been badly let down, this is no reflection on you.

[Morgansangel]

Thank you Mastodon

Thank you Lamplighter, no T didn't tell me why am scared to kick up a fuss incase they take my psychiatrist away too

Thank you Noodizzz. Yeah I watched the documentary. I don't think there are any around here unfortunately and I don't think they'd take me on for a year while I waited :/

Thank you asiablue. I'm too scared to kick up a fuss

[minneymouse]

I'm so sorry this is happening to you. It makes no sense and is very unfair. I know how hard it is to fight for what you need when you are alone and afraid and exhausted just from daily life.
But looking at your messages, I wondered...

Originally Posted by Morgansangel

I'm too scared to kick up a fuss

What have you to got to lose except your life?

Originally Posted by Morgansangel

I wouldn't be here in a year.

BPD is a deadly illness. 1 in 10 people with BPD will die of completed suicide. Please, please, make a fuss. If you're getting nowhere with your psychiatrist, go back to your GP, being clear about what you are asking for. Use the NICE (National Institute of Clinical Excellence) Guidelines for BPD, which state that 'Mental health trusts should develop multidisciplinary specialist teams and/or services for people with personality disorders.' The guidelines also talk about providing twice weekly psychotherapy.
Borderline personality disorder (BPD)

(Interestingly, the guidelines also contain a whole section on 'Managing endings and transitions' which say that withdrawing services should be 'discussed carefully beforehand' with service users, who 'should be supported during the referral period' to other services and 'arrangements for support agreed beforehand'. Wave this document in the face of the organisation your departing therapist works for.)

Does your local Trust have a PD service? If not, what do they offer services users with PD? If it's not adequate or evidence-based, fight the trust to fund your treatment with a neighbouring Trust which does have adequate services. There are organizations which have mental health advocates who can help you to fight. If you are LGBT, and live in London (quite specific I know!), PACE have an advocacy service. Otherwise, these look like useful links:
Advocacy in mental health - Mind
Advocate for Mental Health
And this Independent Health Advocacy Service will help you complain about your current situation:
Independent Health Complaints Advocacy - SEAP

I understand the urge to lie down and die. I do. But if you possibly can, please kick up the fuss of your life. Your life is worth it.

[Morgansangel]

Thanks minneymouse. I'll try, I'm just scared. I guess when I've had a couple of days to get my head round all of this I'll sort out what to do? I'm just lost and confused and scared and upset at the moment.

[Purpledaze]

So sorry this has happened to you. I would definitely try making a fuss, though I understand why you don't want to. I am originally from the uk so a former NHS user too. A friend of mine tried to get counseling when she was Sui, she was put on a long waiting list and offered no immediate help. A couple of years later she had a major life event and then she got counseling. It is crazy how the system works. Do you have a good r/s with your Psychiatrist? Could you speak to him/her about the T situation? Otherwise it's worth trying charities. I had good counseling at the Westminster Pastoral Foundation in London... That was many years ago though!

[Morgansangel]

Thank you purpledaze, unfortunately no, my psych's been off over a year long term sick so I've been passed pillar to post through all the different locums they had in
I'll have a look round local charities but not going to hold my breath because I don't think there's much in my area.

[tinyrabbit]

Oh my goodness, I am so sorry to read this. This is just so unfair. I really hate the NHS sometimes.

You are NOT awful. This is really bad luck. It is NOT because of you. I'm sorry though, it really sucks.

I think it's really unfair that they're saying you have to go to the bottom of the waiting list again, and I'm not sure if that's right. Can I make a suggestion: would you consider contacting your MP? They have people in their offices who help with problems with the NHS and maybe they could look into it. It seems absurd that they could consider you in need of therapy, yet bounce you back to the bottom of the list because of something outside your control.

Are you willing to say what part of the UK you're in? I might have some suggestions depending on where you are.

[Morgansangel]

Hi, thank you for being so lovely.

I have a couple of ideas in the pipeline at the moment but if they don't span out is it ok if I pm you then with a rough idea of where I am?

I just, I dunno, I worry about kicking up too much of a fuss, I mean like, you know how in a restaurant you don't really want to complain because if you complain who knows what gross thing the chef will do to your food?

[tinyrabbit]

Yes do pm - no idea if I'll be able to help but happy to try.

I understand the restaurant thing but I gather things often improve suddenly when MPs get involved rather than vice versa. When I was signed off work the DWP lost my doctors note and were being really horrible. Called my MP's office who called them... and suddenly they magically found the lost sick note.