[emptyspace]

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Do you think it is important for a T to ask permission to touch a client before touching them.... even if it is a pat on the back, etc?

Personally, I don't want my T touching me. She sits on the other side of the room and if she moves closer, I move away.
If she ever touched me without acknowledging it, I would freak out.

It's important to you. That's what matters. Sounds like you might use body language to let people know unconsciously. She might have figured that out being a t. Other people need it. Personal space is individual.

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[Asiablue]

Yes, i think they should ask. We discussed touch at my intake interview, well i asked her what her views were on touch in therapy, she said she'd always ask before touching or hugging a client. And even for clients who are ok with touch she'd check in with them if she'd touched them in session. She touched my arm once in a kind of soothing gesture and she asked me at the next session if i had been ok with it, which i was.

[MusicLover79]

I think they should. I would feel super awkward if my t touched me even if it was a simple gesture.

[ResaLock]

Originally Posted by emptyspace

.
Do you think it is important for a T to ask permission to touch a client before touching them.... even if it is a pat on the back, etc?

Personally, I don't want my T touching me. She sits on the other side of the room and if she moves closer, I move away.
If she ever touched me without acknowledging it, I would freak out.

Wow! That was strange when I saw this post.

I was (and still am) seeing this therapist. I have mentioned this before...but anyway...
My therapist slowly stroked my hangs while I was exchanging a pen. When I was giving him the pen back from signing a receipt. He slowly with all of his fingers wrapped around my hand passed the pen point and slowly caressed my hand and slowly taking the pen.

I went to seek out another therapist which I specifically was looking for a female. (..because I also feel my conversations are restricted by him because he is a male.)

When I told the woman therapist that I only saw once SHE WAS VERY RUDE.
When I told her that. " she replied and said, " he should of asked you first before touching you."
This guy touched me in a caressing sensual way!!!
She completely ignored the reality of it even making a statement saying..."well I know him." ...as in implying I was a liar. She sent me into a trigger panic attack...

I told him I told someone else...I think I more or less see him out of spite...he has denied doing this...when I confronted him. ..he played it off as,"oh what because I accidently touched your finger?"

I told him its pointless seeing him, how hes selfish and not a good counselor. ..and he ruined his therapy with me...

he doesn't seem to care nor even care his damage...he also showed how much he does not care for my health well being a treatment...for lying not me, even committing the act in the first place and apparently he would shove me under a bridge and burry me. Basically lie at the expense of my life because of what he did.

Interesting....thats why I am there for PTSD therapy. So apparently he does not care about anything I say or what anyone did to me.

He has touched me after that...putting his hand on my shoulder a couple of times as he passed me by as I was sitting in a chair and he went to get something or check who or if there was someone in the waiting room.

So I go back spitefully...and after that even flirting with him and rejecting him. I told him it has no value or doesn't mean anything that he writes down. I am sure he is writing incriminating things about me. Even twisting my word as he even does it to me in conversation.

Hes a real mind job...and people speak of him as hes this great loving person.

[ResaLock]

I don't think it should be an issue of even asking...I would concern myself with someone who would even have to ask. When I encounter an ordinary person. Do we have this problem? Do we have to go through all of this? Really were not stupid...if someone touches us by natural encounter we know...if it makes us uncomfortable we should question it...THEY SHOULD KNOW MORE THAN US.

[HazelGirl]

Yes, they should always ask. Mine asks before hugging me every time, and although I always accept, I could refuse if I ever felt like it.

[stopdog]

yes. I would want them to.

[growlycat]

Yes, I would want them to ask.

i don't want her to ask, i want her to go ahead and do it.

I think generally they should ask, or an understanding should be reached between client and T (ie, end of session hugs being okay, for instance).

Yes, I think they should ask. I have heard that Ts in my country are taught never to initiate any touch beyond a handshake. I don't know if that is correct but I think it's a good policy.

[Nightlight]

I think that generally they should ask, yes. In fact, I wish they would ask. It would give clients a chance to say yes as well as no.

[Jordy]

Mine never asks, but usually I'm ok with it... but recently there were two exceptions:
- one day in skills group she stood behind me while I was sitting down, and I don't know she soothingly touched my hair and shoulder. Made me a bit uncomfortable, as it almost triggered a flashback. luckily I managed to stay in the moment and it barely lasted a few seconds.
-last wednesday at one point she also wanted to soothe and put her hand on my arm, but it was too close to my wrist to me, so again had to remind myself I was safe.

But I don't want to say anything as I also crave human contact and I don't want her to stop.

[A Red Panda]

It wouldn't go well if my T ever touched me without asking. It could be something totally innocent and/or accidental, and I would react by flinching or yanking my arm away or something. It's my gut reaction. If I'm prepared for someone to touch me I can hold in the reaction, but it would take me by surprise.

I wouldn't want to make him feel bad, but it's how it would go.

[granite1]

most definitely I think they should ask . my T has never touched me and I think I radiate I will go off all over you if you even think about getting to close

[someone321]

My T can touch me only when we shake hands but I am always "prepared" for it so it's okay and he doesn't have to ask me for it (and I guess I could always refuse doing that if I wanted). Apart from it, if suddenly T touched me or hugged me I would simply freak out and I am not sure if I would come back to this T...

[reesecups]

Originally Posted by emptyspace

.
Do you think it is important for a T to ask permission to touch a client before touching them.... even if it is a pat on the back, etc?

Personally, I don't want my T touching me. She sits on the other side of the room and if she moves closer, I move away.
If she ever touched me without acknowledging it, I would freak out.

I think that anyone should ask another if it's okay first. Everyone has different boundaries and/or reasons they may not want touched by others. I can't imagine hugging my T or the T I had before. But with the first two, it was easy and felt nice.

[BlessedRhiannon]

Yes, I think a T should ask, if a client hasn't brought it up first. I specifically told my T that I was uncomfortable with touch and she's never initiated anything beyond the handshake the first time we met. The only time she has my permission to touch without asking first is if I'm in such a panic that I'm non-responsive. In that case, she can touch my arm or hand as a means of grounding me. I've made her aware of this after a session in which I was panicking so badly that I was nearly non-responsive.

[dumburn]

Not just T's anyone and everyone should ask before touching someone else unless you already have a relationship or Dr-patient but then that one you usually expect and are prepared for.

Just my opunion as someone who hates being touched and has quite a violent reaction when caught off guard.

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