Why can't I get Therapy out my head? How do/should you feel after Therapy?

Hello x

I never want my therapy sessions to finish. I could stay in T's 'safe' room all day. She doesn't even have to talk to me. I'd be quite happy to just sit and get on with some work. Actually even in reception would be ok.

I've never had a 'bad' session. My T is so lovely but after sessions, perhaps normally, I get such mixed emotions. Sometimes I feel really angry, sometimes sad and sometimes relived/happy and sometimes all of them. And sometimes I have a crash day the next day where I can't do anything. ( lots of sometimes )

Then I spend the week going about my normal days but in the back of my head I am constantly looking forward to/ anticipating/ thinking about the next session..I then get to 'T day' and feel so ill/sick with anxiety.. I have my 50min session which is always really comforting/helpful and insightful but then I go through the whole process over the week again...

I should be focusing on my T homework's and life.. and not 'what to bring up next session' etc.. Why can't I get Therapy out my head?

I was just wondering if anyone feels the same or knows what I can do to stop feeling like this?

Thanks

Unfortunately I cannot tell you how to stop feeling like this but if you find the solution - please let me know as I have exactly the same problem... But what I realized is that actually after some time it is a bit better and I have to keep myself busy - working more, going out more, meeting others etc. So that I do not have so much time to think about it... I thought that having sessions twice a week would help - it didn't, it was even worse because I didn't have enough time to go back to the routine between sessions... Now my T went to the conference and I didn't see her already for 10 days and it is much better...

I certainly feel exactly the same way quite a bit, I'd venture to say 90% of the posters in this forum have expressed a similar sentiment at one time or another!

It's normal to be busy processing the deep emotional information that comes up in therapy, and it makes sense it would influence your outside life, as therapy is a space where your outside life is focused, magnified, dissected, so you can better understand yourself and integrate that understanding into your day to day life.

So, aside from feeling ill/anxious, I'd say, don't do anything.

However, as far as that unpleasant side effect, you might try:

writing out how you're feeling/what you're thinking so you can put it to rest until next session a bit more

purchasing a cheap set of worry dolls and setting your concerns in the box with them until the next session

reassuring yourself about all your strengths/skills since therapy can put our weak spots into focus

making extra time right after session to switch to a really pleasurable distraction and change your mindset a bit so you don't leave yourself open to being in that processing mode constantly if it's too tiring

have fun! Get together with friends, try something new, etc.

It does get better, btw. Eventually...

I feel exactly the same. As I've got to know her better and trust her more and feel safe with her, the more intense this experience seems to be. I just dont want the time with her to end and the range of feelings after session and the day after are so hard. I have started writing. And this forum helps! I don't know if it will always be like this or if these feelings will subside as I move on? It's painful. Xx

Sometimes what I talk about in Therapy stays in my head for the rest of the day or sometimes even longer.

I think it's ok for therapy to be on your mind a lot. It's an important part of your life, perhaps the most important for some people at some points along the journey, so go ahead and give it the attention you deserve.

Maybe we need a "how are you doing after therapy" check-in thread...

I think that's what it's all about. The processing continues 24 hours a day. Just my humble opinion.

I definitely feel the same way. I've even told my T that I could stay in his office for 8-10 hours a day, every day. Depending on what's going on in my life and what I'm working on with T, sometimes the time flies by between sessions and I "forget" about my next session. Sometimes I'm watching the minutes tick by so slowly to the next session. I go twice a week and sometimes even that's not enough.

I would recommend keeping busy with work/school/family/friends, whatever is in your life now. With time, it DOES get easier and you DO find that balance between being obsessed and constantly thinking about therapy and getting on with your own life. There will be days when the thoughts are overwhelming about the next or current session, and days when the thoughts are hardly at the front of your mind. Hang in there, you'll find the right balance.

Feel the same way. I look forward to my sessions. After having one, I think about all that was discussed, and try for a better, deeper understanding. You sound pretty normal to me.