Dilemma... To continue or not????

First off I don't really know what I am trying to accomplish with this post I guess just to put this in writing and maybe outta my head.

So I have been trying to 'quit' therapy again... Well I had already done so back in oct but then my dad died in dec and that brought up some stuff and I started talking to t again in jan but I have done another huge chunk of work involving forgiving my mom huge step that and had a good visit with my mom recently and rebuilding that relationship and I just... Don't need t the way I used to, I feel like I don't need formal therapy anymore, my appointments have become something else they are more like expensive chats with a colleague or something? I didn't schedule another appt this last time due to work schedules being up in the air right now and I realize I have the opportunity to just not call her and go on with my life...

And therein is the dilemma, she has been such a big big help to me, I have come a very long way from the closed up little person who first walked into her office 2.5 years ago. I do most of my inner work on my own and tell her about it after the fact. But I feel so much loyalty to both her and this whole process and somehow can't separate the two??? I don't know. I don't 'need' to talk to her anymore, I 'want' to. I know that. But wanting means it is a luxury now, and I can't justify the cost, so I know i need to quit.... Last time I mentioned quitting she laughed at me well it was the timing that was funny and I laughed too.... But I let it drop and kept making more appointments....ugh.

Typing this has already helped. I respect her too much to just'disappear on her. I need to buck up, and email her this post, and schedule a final appt to discuss it and say goodbye.

I think...

If anyone read this far comments welcome!

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I think you've answered your question. You respect her, yourself, and the relationship, and going in to acknowledge that and say a proper goodbye, though difficult, sounds like the right thing to do to me. The other way might seem easier- to either stop quietly, or to continue when it's not worth it, but I think this way does seem best.

I don't think ones owes a therapist any particular type of ending. But scheduling a final appointment sounds like it might make you happier about it.

Can you send her this post? It does sound like it's time to quit, at least for the time being. Good job!

Does it have to be quitting or saying goodbye? Perhaps it's just that you're at a point where you can stop seeing your T right now - that doesn't have to mean forever, unless you want it to. You could talk to your T about spacing appointments out to once a month and see how that goes, or even just plan a short phone check in. If all is still going well, you could wrap up for now with the understanding that your T is available, should you need her again.

I think Rhiannon has a really good point. You don't have to quit or say goodbye. You could tell her that you are doing really well right now and would like to try and get along on your own for the time being. You can always go back or never go back.

I personally find those types of "endings" are mentally easier to process.