[granite1]

I have been seeing the same T for about 4 years i have rarely seen her outside her office .maybe in the hall or something. she just stays in her box physically and in my head . I don't have a problem with that . last week when I got there she was outside picking some flowers. I had to walk right by her to get into the building .so she saw me and smiled and said hi . I walked over to her and asked her what kind of flowers they were .she answered and I went inside to wait for her.
today she had called me and told me she was going to be about 15 min late for session that she had a dr appointment.so I got there about 10 min after and waited in my car. after a bit another car showed up and parked away from mine. I saw in the mirror that it was my T. I kind of was set off guard. but decided to get out of my car and walk in with her . so I caught up with her and said I was following her in. she asked if we had showed up together I said I had been a little earlier .so I asked her if she was really ok. she said she was that she just needed to get a shot. I told her that it would have been ok if she canceled . we got to the door and she was met by someone who wanted to talk to her. she said she will come get me in a bit .
what would you do?? just wondering .would you have stopped and talked to her or walked in with her making small talk or avoided the situation at all costs or ignored her in both situations? just wondering.

[CantExplain]

I'm glad you were able to be "normal" around her.

[stopdog]

The second one I see has sometimes driven up at the same time as I do. Sometimes meet up with her on the steps and sometimes I just wait a couple of minutes and then go. We do not talk accept to say hello.

[Leah123]

Originally Posted by granite1

I have been seeing the same T for about 4 years i have rarely seen her outside her office .maybe in the hall or something. she just stays in her box physically and in my head . I don't have a problem with that . last week when I got there she was outside picking some flowers. I had to walk right by her to get into the building .so she saw me and smiled and said hi . I walked over to her and asked her what kind of flowers they were .she answered and I went inside to wait for her.
today she had called me and told me she was going to be about 15 min late for session that she had a dr appointment.so I got there about 10 min after and waited in my car. after a bit another car showed up and parked away from mine. I saw in the mirror that it was my T. I kind of was set off guard. but decided to get out of my car and walk in with her . so I caught up with her and said I was following her in. she asked if we had showed up together I said I had been a little earlier .so I asked her if she was really ok. she said she was that she just needed to get a shot. I told her that it would have been ok if she canceled . we got to the door and she was met by someone who wanted to talk to her. she said she will come get me in a bit .
what would you do?? just wondering .would you have stopped and talked to her or walked in with her making small talk or avoided the situation at all costs or ignored her in both situations? just wondering.

I think it's great that you spoke and walked with her. I too would have tried to do that, it's lovely to be able to just interact casually, outside that box.

We have occasionally arrived together. He will generally come up to car and say something like "See you inside' while i desparately try to ignore him. Glad you could walk in with her and make small talk.

[kaliope]

i would have done what you did and just acted natural.

[JustShakey]

Chances are I would have panicked and hid. What you did is what I would want to do though.

I would have walked in with him, chatting along the way.

[sweepy62]

I would have done as you did. Once I walked into the elevator and she walked in too, I almost didn't hold the door lol, we said smiled, she said give me a couple of minutes and I will pick you up.

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[Wren_]

I'm not really sure what I would do ... but I like the choices you went with granite; especially that you asked about the flowers your T was picking

[nottrustin]

In similar situations we have talked naturally about something other than therapy.

[pbutton]

I would probably say hi to mine. He is super friendly in the waiting room and he's talked to or waved goodbye to me the few times we've walked out together.

[iheartjacques]

I've walked in at the same time as T. He says he'll see me inside. he usually walks on ahead because he's got to get his files, take his jacket off etc. then he'll come and get me from the waiting room.

It sounds like it worked out okay, granite - I'm glad you made that choice. My T's office is at the top of a long and fairly narrow staircase, and there is no waiting room, so even if we were to arrive at the same time, walking and chatting would not be an option. I don't do much small talk in any case, and I can't imagine doing it with T. I'd say hello, same as I do when we meet in the street, but not more than that.

[someone321]

I'm glad that it worked for you well
I cannot meet my T when I go into a session as I'm the last client but I see her often at the train station as her train goes just 3min after mine from the same platform... I've realized though that she ignores me, I don't know if in purpose but she never even looks in my direction and always chooses the weird path to avoid passing next to me. There is an escalator and I am usually on a top of it waiting for my H, but my T still manages to pretend that she absolutely doesn't see me... Only once, after really terrible session she saw me and smiled in my direction, as my train was already on the platform I smiled back and went into the train. Since then my T never comes to the platform before my train leaves

[granite1]

im glad that people here seem to think what I did was ok I was kind of worried that it might have crossed some boundary by asking if she really was ok. it was strange how I felt comfortable talking to her outside of the office. I don't talk to many people.

[blur]

granite, you did great. i'd probably chat a little bit too on the way in but not sure if i'd ask many questions.

Originally Posted by someone321

I'm glad that it worked for you well
I cannot meet my T when I go into a session as I'm the last client but I see her often at the train station as her train goes just 3min after mine from the same platform... I've realized though that she ignores me, I don't know if in purpose but she never even looks in my direction and always chooses the weird path to avoid passing next to me. There is an escalator and I am usually on a top of it waiting for my H, but my T still manages to pretend that she absolutely doesn't see me... Only once, after really terrible session she saw me and smiled in my direction, as my train was already on the platform I smiled back and went into the train. Since then my T never comes to the platform before my train leaves

i think Ts legally can't acknowledge clients in public unless the client first acknowledges them so as not to break the client's confidentiality in front of others. the problem is Ts don't tell you about this so if you don't know and run into your T they might be acting weird and avoiding you and you don't know why. i had this happen with a T intern i saw a few times. i thought she was rejecting me when she pretended not to see me. of course i saw her before she turned away and i knew she'd seen me. i had no idea of the policy. i don't think i went back after that but she was terrible anyways.

[Aloneandafraid]

You did great, Granite. I saw mine in the market a couple of weeks ago and hid behind a stall until she had walked on (we were both en route to my session). It was quite funny in a way but I also felt sad that I didn't have the confidence to acknowledge her in public - plus I was just too scared! Well Done Granite.