[A18793715]

I thought he was perfect based on his specialties and bio. Maybe he is for some people. But not for me. He's so.. direct and jumps straight into things. One of the very first things he said to me was that his goal was to get me to where I don't need to see him as fast as he can. That alone, I mean, i understand the concept but just flat out saying it in the tone that he did, I felt like he was more like "Let's get this over with" than anything. Plus he asked me if I wanted to jump straight into traumas within the first 30 minutes. It was just too much, so I kinda drifted away towards the end of the session.

I wrote a letter for him telling him I was suicidal and didn't know what to do or anything but I couldn't give it to him.

So now I'm back to feeling completely alone and at this point, unsavable.

I'm so tired of everything. I just want to give up.

[HazelGirl]

Eek! Try a different one! Sometimes it takes a long time to find one that works for you. I promise there is one out there, and you are one T closer to finding him or her.

[Leah123]

Good for you for going!!!
Good for you for knowing yourself well enough to realize he wasn't a match right away!!!

This is an opportunity for you to find someone better. It's so try that a bio isn't enough to find a fit-, just like resumes or dating profiles, we have to interview. Just because it wasn't a match the first time doesn't mean there's anything wrong.

I'm sorry you're feeling so very awful. (((A18793715)))

[EJ711]

Sounds like he might be a fairly new therapist.

Oh Man -- jumping straight into traumas.

I think you need to feel safe with a therapist before you can make any kind of headway.

[A18793715]

Yeah. He graduated in 2012, so he's new.

And thanks everyone. I'm just so disheartened. The process of finding another. Knowing that it could take too long.

[Leah123]

I'm sorry, that is disappointing. I hope you feel better soon, keep posting. Do you have any 'go to' things for comfort? Hot chocolate often helps me.

[A18793715]

I don't have any go to things that are comforting. I just lock my door and sit in my room.

[Leah123]

Well, you can start your list with posting here. Do you have any music in your room, or a blanket to wrap up in, or maybe a walk around the block?

Nothing wrong with just feeling the pain, but if you need a little respite, those might help, or a hot bath or cup of tea.

[A18793715]

I can't listen or watch anything. In the past week, I started hearing voices in the background and it drives me crazy. Too paranoid to go anywhere. My sister got mad yesterday when I told her I was scared because I felt like it was a trap and someone would kill me. I guess she thought I was making up a excuse. I wish I wasn't. I've spent all week trying to keep calm enough and counting down the hours to my session. Now. Just. Blah.

[RTerroni]

Originally Posted by A18793715

Yeah. He graduated in 2012, so he's new.

And thanks everyone. I'm just so disheartened. The process of finding another. Knowing that it could take too long.

Sometimes it's good to see someone with a little more experience.

[wotchermuggle]

Do you know what type of therapy he does? Maybe find someone with a different approach?

[A18793715]

He does cbt.

[UnderRugSwept]

Do you have another T in mind to call and make an appt with? I am sorry this T was such a disappointment. It's good you knew he wasn't for you right away tho, and now you are able to quickly move on to the next possible T option. Picking a new T truly does suck, I know. I hope you find an experienced T who understands what you need and that you have a connection with very soon.

[justdesserts]

Originally Posted by A18793715

I don't have any go to things that are comforting. I just lock my door and sit in my room.

I'm so sorry--I've felt this way before. If you can, try to find something soothing, music, writing, a favorite TV show, a book,, anything. For me, that alone time leads to thinking that is distorted and it just keeps echoing. I hope you can find some relief soon.

[stopdog]

It is distressing when they don't line up with their credentials. Good luck on trying a new one. I think it might be worth it to try a few others.

[A18793715]

I haven't started looking for another t yet. I just got home when I posted this and it's after most close so I figured I'll just do the searching later because I just want to lay here.

[guilloche]

I'm so sorry that this one didn't work out... but what a HUGE BIG STEP you took getting yourself there! That's awesome... I remember how scared you were of going. YOU DID GOOD - even if he wasn't the right therapist for you, that's not your fault - you still did good.

Hang in there, and please keep trying. I hope the next one is much better... and maybe he gave you some good clues for what to ask on the phone? Maybe you could ask about the type of therapy they do, and if it's CBT - they might not be a good match?