I wish I'd never said anything. It's changed everything.

[iheartjacques]

telling what? I'm sorry, I must've missed something

[Tongalee]

Originally Posted by _Mouse

I wish I'd never said anything. It's changed everything.

I feel the same way. I'm sorry that this is the case for you, for us :/

I just got back from another awful session.... I told T I wished I'd never said anything.... T helped me see this isn't my fault, any of it.... But I struggle to speak about it at any length.... T said I have a right not to talk about it.... But I also have a right to talk about it.... "he" has taken away my right to talk about it.... I've kept running that statement over and over.... If I don't talk about it at length..... Than he still holds power over me... .

[ThisWayOut]

Talking about it can be really scary and unnerving. I'm sorry it's so difficult right now. I can relate. I recently told t something and my head is all in a panic over it, so much so that I wrote asking her if I was having a psychotic break, and kinda just begging her to tell me I was (because somehow that would be easier than this).
I agree with your statement there about him still having the power as long as you ate silenced about it...
it wasn't your fault.

I'm glad your therapist has said it's okay either way: talk about or not talk about it. It is truly up to us whether we discuss it. To me, that's a pretty powerful thing. I've told my therapist that it happened and then said, "And I don't really feel the need to talk about it in depth. It happened. I'm safe now. I'd rather spend my time working on what it did to change me and learn how to move on and live my life in more peace." So, that's what we're doing. Each person has to decide for themselves what the right path is to their own health and wellbeing.