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#1
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For those who have trust issues or a history of some kind of abuse, I was wondering if therapy has helped you not only to come to terms with your past but also to deal with everyday life and to build healthy relationships. I am processing events and trying to understand pain and heal from past scars, but I was wondering if I will ever be able to also live current/future relationships in a healthy way without getting triggered for the rest of my life and to get rid of that same old anguish that inevitably comes up in triggering situations. Or am I screwed up forever on that perspective. I would like to hear about others' experience.. Thanks a lot.
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Everything will be ok in the end. If it's not okay, it's not the end. |
![]() Anonymous100185, Crazy Hitch
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#2
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I don't think you're screwed up forever Ambra.
If that were the case, therapy wouldn't exist. It will help you process and deal with your emotions. Maybe not 100% forget no, but deal with it better. Take care. |
![]() Ambra
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#3
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Yes, it did help me in dealing with the past. It didn't help me much with learning how to tackle my other life struggles I was dealing with at the time, but it did help me process the abusive past to the point that I learned how to protect myself from those who abused me and came to terms with those events and with those people to some extend. I was processing my pain and anger for a long time until I became emotionally detached from it enough to be able to see the big picture and to see those who abused me as people and not as monsters. I was still keeping a healthy distance from them but wasn't judging them as much anymore. It helped big time. It made me more peaceful and more accepting of myself.
Nothing is perfect though. My work isn't finished, and I don't believe it ever gets finished. I still get triggered by certain things and I think I will for the rest of my life. But I deal with those triggers much better now. If you want to heal completely, meaning that there won't be any trace of your past and your trauma, that's not going to happen and this is something you'll need to accept if you want to get better, otherwise you'll have a never-ending disappointment. But if you want to heal to some extend, to cope with your trauma better and to have a more fulfilling life as a result, then yes, it is absolutely possible. |
![]() Ambra
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![]() Ambra
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#4
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Thank you for your replies.
I know I'm not going to heal completely as it had never happened and I don't even want to forget that. It would have been better if it hadn't happened, but since that's how it went it is part of me anyway and it will be forever. I meant the side effects that stay once I have "finished" this processing and acceptance work on trauma and past issues. E.g. an abused person, who works on their past and come to terms with it and accept it as it was not their fault and whatever. And they meet e.g. someone special who wants to be by their side and and yet they are still bloody scared - even though rationally they know there's nothing to be afraid of anymore and it is not that situation anymore. This eternal state of fear worries me. But it's also true I'm not done yet.. Sorry for how badly I explained it by the way..!
__________________
Everything will be ok in the end. If it's not okay, it's not the end. |
#5
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Yes, my therapy has helped me immensely in my day to day life. Not completely and I still have a lot of work to do. But when I look back on what my life was like before therapy and what it is now, it's so different. Both for better and for worse, but with most aspects I am closer to where I want to be in life than I was before I started. I have more self-confidence, more initiative, more contact with the people around me, more courage. I know myself better with my past too and I have a more profound understanding of how I was hurt or what I missed growing up, the difference between what was and what should have been. I haven't experienced therapy as healing one or the other, present or past. For me as a client in therapy it's been some of both.
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![]() Ambra
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#6
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I wish I had an answer for you. I'm not there yet.
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![]() Ambra
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