[Christina86]

So I had my first EVER appointment with a psychiatrist. I'm ashamed to admit it, but wow do I ever want to talk to him again. Ever met a T (or another person) who just GETS it? Seems to understand you?

I had to see him because he's ran the psychotherapy group I've been a part of, but apparently I'm such a "good" client that he wants to see me again next week. He kinda scared me though, he said "then we'll determine if I need to see you on a regular basis". I'm not the kind to ask for help or accept help. So this was a bit of a change for me. I was actually completely honest with him, it was so weird. I'm never that forthcoming with any details of my life. It's like pulling teeth usually actually.

So I have another appointment on next Thursday that I pray will go well.

[Perna]

That's great canders! Glad it went so well.

yeah that is great. it can be hard to find clinicians that you click with. i'm so glad that you seem to click with this one!

:-)

[(JD)]

You are so deserving of someone who "gets it!"

[WinterRose]

What a great blessing! Connection can be hard to come by. How exciting!

[jacq10]

(((((((((((((((Christina))))))))))))))))

I'm glad to hear that things went well ... I know its scary but it could be such a good thing for you! The feeling of being accepted or understood is one of the best, and that you deserve my friend!

Let us know how it goes!!!!
Jacqueline

[lauren_helene]

That is awesome Canders!!!

[Christina86]

You're all so wonderful.

(((((((((((Hugs))))))))))))))

I'm still so disgustingly happy. I never have had this with my current T. But this shrink really gets under my skin. I guess I'm more transparent than I'd like to admit.

So I will see what he says next week. if I can be really honest I can tell him more stuff, and maybe he'll try to help. I'm at a loss as to what to do after my final session with T next week.

Ups and downs. lol

enjoy the happy :-)

you deserve it

[Christina86]

Thanks (((((((((alexandra_k)))))))))))))

[Christina86]

Okay, I'm driving myself nuts here. Please tell me I'm not insane!

I keep thinking about what I should have said, what I didn't say what I did say that I shouldn't have. And now all I can think is that when I see him on Thursday that he's absolutely going to think I'm nuts and he's going to get fed up with me and that will be it. I'll have singlehandedly screwed up yet another oppurtunity for help.

Still doesnt' help that I cant ask for it.

So now I've got to go in on Thursday and tell him that whatever I presented myself as was wrong and that I'm really a bad person and I need to convince him of that which means that he's not going to like me.

Okay, so I'm sabotaging myself. Stupid, yes I realize. Why do I do that ... Now I can't shake the feeling that I'm wasting his time again. I hate being a bother. I think I'm going to go hide and cry now.

Yes, I'm a pathetic idiot who gets attached too quickly to people.

no no, you're fine! we do that! next time you go tell him of your reaction and tell him the things you wish you'd said. topics are never closed, and that is one of the good things about therapy!

i just now came from my session and have decided i will write/journal right my sessions to help with just what you describe. and next week i will say that i thought more about this or that topic and i have more to say. i may even contradict what i said today in session but that's ok.

i'm so glad you found someone you like!

[(JD)]

First, you're not stupid, sabotaging yourself, nor an idiot... and you simply must stop thinking and talking this way! or else we are all blathering idiots! stomp stomp stomp It's normal processes you are dealing with... imo

I agree, nothing is etched in steel for therapy. You talk about where you are from at the moment, and the next moment, if you have changed, then speak from there

[Bethsway]

good luck to you at your next session!!!

[January]

((((((( Christina )))))))))

I am so happy for you! It's about time good things started coming your way.

Hugs,

Jan

[Christina86]

(((((((ECHOES)))))))))))

Thank you for the reinforcement. I feel like such an idiot right now though

[Christina86]

(((((((((Sky)))))))))))

hehe. Thank you for your attitude, it does help!

[Christina86]

Thanks ((((((((((Bethsway))))))))))))

and ((((((((((((((January))))))))))))))))))

I hope it still goes well, even with me changing what I said in the next session.

[(JD)]

Yep. It IS your session ((((hugs))))

[Christina86]

</font><blockquote><div id="quote"><font class="small">Quote:</font>
_Sky said:
Yep. It IS your session ((((hugs))))

</div></font></blockquote><font class="post">

Thanks for phrasing it like that. I know it's not just me being there - that it's actually FOR me, but I keep thinking I'm wasting everyone's time. *sigh*

[WinterRose]

Ooo Canders - me too, me too. Especially when you really click - then it's even scarier. The feelings like that come and go in waves. Chin up! Thursday should be really good for you.

Awesome, Canders. I went through 5 or 6 pdocs before finding one that "got it." Then he informed me that it was his last day at the consultation center. Grrrr.. I'm so glad you found yours. If there is a connection, things come out a lot easier.

[Christina86]

((((((((((WinterRose))))))))))))

((((((((((((pinksoil))))))))))))))))

Thanks both of you.

[sidony]

Canders!

That's awesome!!! And no no no don't get upset about all the double-thinking on everything. Everybody does that. I've done it about a million and a half times. It's normal. Just talk about all of it. It'll make a huge difference when you're interacting with someone who really gets you. That's awesome! Good luck at the next session!

Sidony

[Christina86]

(((((((Sidony)))))))))))

Thanks for the reassuring

I guess I'll tell him, even if he thinks I've completely lost my marbles.