[KillerRaisin]

Hi. Hope this is the right place for this question.
There`s something I`m thinking about alot. obviously..
Is it normal,or acceptable, to only get therapy sessions once every other week, when you`re so suicidal every day is hell?? It feels so meaningless; 45 minutes- why even bother starting talking about something important. The session`s over in a blink of an eye, and you`re back on your own again.. And then of course, next session, I have forgotten what we were talking about last time.
1 hour and a half in total each month.. They "just don`t have more time".
Yesterday, my therapist manages to say: "and, of course, the most important work is the the work that happens between sessions".
WHAAAT. That`s just so wrong to say to someone struggling like this. Have no chance at all to work with issues on my own now..
It feels like no one at all take me seriously.
My family puts all hope and expectations in the "magical works" of the so-called professionals (even though they have never helped me before), and
I feel I have to fight with them (my family that is) as well, trying to make them understand that that is so wrong..so naive..
I don`t have much faith in therapists and doctors etc anymore at all. But, I just don`t know where else to turn to for help. And when THEY don`t even have time for me..

Sorry if I sound like a big complainer. I`m just so frustrated..

I agree 45 minutes once every two weeks is not very much, I imagine it is really not nearly as helpful as weekly sessions. Even with weekly I find the time goes very quickly.

[KillerRaisin]

Thanks. Yes, I think it`s waay too little. Seems almost pointless.
Only`ve had 6 sessions here so far, so should give them some more time before I give it up, or start looking for others. I actually had to fight to get accepted here. Took over 6 months. (In the place I was before this, they really had a lack of competence. Couldn`t continue.)
...ouff.. gonna waste away a lot more (( valuable )) time here I guess..

[NowhereUSA]

When I'm dealing with intense suicidal ideation (like I am these days), I've bumped my sessions up to twice a week. Once a week if I'm having a rough go of it. Less if I'm managing.

Have you talked with your T about more sessions? Or if you can pay for longer sessions (and/or what does your insurance pay for)?

[KillerRaisin]

Have been impossible to get a session weekly, at least so far. She says she`s too busy.. Doubt that it would be possible with longer ones, but will definitely ask about that!
I`ve always believed that everyone, once you`ve gotten a therapist, would have the right to at least a session per week!..

[laxer12]

How long have you been seeing her? Is it possible to find another T with more availability? I'm really lucky and found a T that doesn't have a full schedule (pretty sure she works part time) so rescheduling appointments is really easy to do. I had to go two weeks without seeing my T because I was out of town and that was hard enough once, I can't imagine it is at all easy for you...I think you should maybe start exploring the possibility of seeing someone else and when you first talk with them, as how often they are able to get you into their schedule and how easy it would be to see him/her more often if needed.

[musinglizzy]

When I started therapy, I was going once a week, 50 minute sessions. I felt very pressured to try to make the most of that 50 minutes per week, and it stressed me out. I was barely clearing my throat. It didn't help that when I was in there, that 50 minutes seemed to go by like it was only 15. After 6 weeks, she bumped me up to twice a week (mid July or so) and I've been at twice a week ever since. That has been perfect for me, Mondays and Thursdays are just perfect. I'm struggling lately...especially having a hard time talking, and even though sometimes my sessions seem like such a waste of time for both of us, twice a week really couldn't be more perfect. That's twice a week I have to commit myself to go in even if I don't feel like it (and that's how I've felt lately), so it's helpful for me to see that I have something I need to really push myself to do. I'm not all that highly functioning at home right now, so at least I can be proud that I went, even though everything in me wanted to just stay home.

So, from someone who goes twice a week, I can tell you I can't see going every other week, especially with the issues you're dealing with. That just doesn't seem reasonable. Hopefully something will work out....you need to get in more often than that.

[KillerRaisin]

Ah, really lucky with your T, sounds nice !
Yeah, two weeks can be hard enough..
I started at the end of January, so it has been a little while now. Though we actually haven`t started working on anything yet...
Yes, it is tempting to start looking for someone else, even though it`s probably not easy..
I know if I find one with a private practise, they will probably have the time, I think you could even get a session the very next day. Buuut, that will be too expensive I`m afraid.
Will try to man up next session and ask if there will ever be a chance of more frequent sessions here with her.
And then take it from there. somehow.

[KillerRaisin]

And hi, Musinglizzy. Thanks for your share as well! Didn`t see the reply before I sent the last one.
Now, after reading replies from all of you, a session once every other week sounds even less than it did before.
Thanks. You made it clearer to me-I have to do something about that!

[musinglizzy]

Hopefully she'll be able to give you an idea about upping your sessions in the near future. If not, I hope you can find someone who can take you...maybe even twice a week? Do you have insurance or have to pay out of pocket?

I've heard, and my T has also said the most important work happens between sessions. But she encourages me to Email between sessions, and more is shared that way. Did you see the post "for those who can't afford therapy?" It's info on texting/messaging T's... would you consider that? It may be something to hold you over for awhile. And they're available all week, vs. waiting every other week for your current T. You could try this in addition to your regular T, until you get more frequency in your sessions.

I am only able to see my therapist every other week because it's not what she normally does and I am her only client. I also struggle with constant suicidal ideation. It's hard, but it is all I have and I have to make the most of it. I do some reading in between and I know I could call her if I needed to. (I don't.) I hope you can get weekly sessions soon. I think it would be better.

[AllHeart]

POSSIBLE TRIGGER
Has your therapist even advised you on what work it is you are supposed to be doing in between sessions? What support does she have set up for you in case you get to your 'breaking point'?

As someone who used to be at high-risk for suicide daily, there is no way 45 minutes, bi-weekly sessions would have been nearly enough for me. My T. had me in weekly for 90 minute sessions, plus additional phone and email support as needed.

You need to demand more time. You deserve it. If your current T. can't give it to you, you owe it to yourself to find someone who can. You are worth the effort!

i see my T twice a week, for 50 mins each. 45 mins every other week is NOT enough especially for a suicidal person. when i was suicidal/in a md episode i in fact had therapy x3 a week and i wouldn't regret it at all, best decision i ever made.

is there any way you can bump it up to every week... maybe twice a week? all i can say is that twice a week has been a godsend for me.

[KillerRaisin]

Sorry to hear that puzzle_bug1987. Hope you at some point will get the chance to have more frequent sessions as well.
At least it`s a plus that you can call her if you need it (though that`s not always easy, I know..)

Allheart; Nope, my T has not at all talked about any work I should consentrate on.
And btw, it really feels like Aspergers is all she knows, and therefor blame every frokking problem I have on aspergers. It`s reeeeeally frustrating. (I soo want help figuring out if I am Bipolar or Borderline. And help with BDD I know I have but haven`t been diagnosed with yet either..)
Have got her e-mail. But I don`t feel like using it, since she doesn`t seem to have a clue what to say/do anyway..
So it`s really tempting to ask for a different T there, OR look elsewhere..

Not sure how it works in the US, or where you all live But here we pay a fee each time we go to the doctor, psychologists etc state-operated. When you have paid up to the equivalent of 270 dollars, you get the rest of the treatments (doctors, psychologists, polyclinics, some meds, etc) for the rest of the year without paying for them.
I could go to a private practising T (great availability), but then I have to pay in full. I don`t have that much money..
I did now find a list over private practising T`s with state funding here in town. So if I understand correctly, I could go one of them
and then pay up till I get the "freecard" - (directly translated)- the rest for free, as I do now. They will of course most likely be really busy.. But I guess I could start calling and/or mailing (I really hate calling ;P ), IF not my T will give me info that makes me want to continue there..
(Hope this it`s understandable. Not quite sure how to explain it.)

The texting/messaging-thing is also a good idea, thanks musinglizzy!

Annaflower; She has said she doesn`t have the time to meet once a week. But I will confront her with that again now,tell her it`s not good enough.
Glad to hear you can get sessions that often when you need

Oh, and by the way, no, I don`t have an insurance that covers things like this.

[MoxieDoxie]

Once a week did not work for me when extremely suicidal. My original T was out of pocket and I could not afford more time but found a T under insurance and I always did better when seen twice a week. I have to give credit that I am alive because of that extra weekly session.

[KillerRaisin]

Glad to hear you could get more sessions, Moxiedoxie!
And thanks for sharing.
I`m working on a plan here now, after hearing from all of you

im glad you're working on a plan killerRaisin