Home Menu

Menu


Reply
Thread Tools Display Modes
  #1  
Old Jun 18, 2015, 10:17 AM
emptyspace's Avatar
emptyspace emptyspace is offline
Member
 
Member Since: Jul 2011
Posts: 353
.
Do you think your T views "the work" differently than you do?
Who's perspective is more accurate?

For example, you might see showing up for appointments as "the work," but your T might see it as working through the transference that is making it hard for you to show up at therapy.

Do you think that the difference in views could cause problems in the therapeutic relationship?

advertisement
  #2  
Old Jun 18, 2015, 10:28 AM
stopdog stopdog is offline
underdog is here
 
Member Since: Sep 2011
Location: blank
Posts: 35,154
In that the therapist believes she does work, yes. The woman refused to explain what was meant by the phrase - so if it is problem what I think about what goes on, I think the fault lies with her.
__________________
Please NO @

Selfishness is not living as one wishes to live, it is asking others to live as one wishes to live.
Oscar Wilde
Well Behaved Women Seldom Make History - Laurel Thatcher Ulrich
Pain is inevitable. Suffering is optional.
Thanks for this!
PinkFlamingo99
  #3  
Old Jun 18, 2015, 10:31 AM
Anonymous50005
Guest
 
Posts: n/a
We don't really use the word "work" with each other, but I think we are mostly on the same page. I would guess that a difference in perceptions about it could create problems, but that is where communication is needed.
  #4  
Old Jun 18, 2015, 10:42 AM
unaluna's Avatar
unaluna unaluna is offline
Elder Harridan x-hankster
 
Member Since: Jun 2011
Location: Milan/Michigan
Posts: 42,171
We talk about the work a lot. He has to bring me up to speed a lot, in that i dont realize or recognize what is going on behind the scenes so to speak. For example, after a few years, i made a comment about how reliable the bus was and how surprising that was to me. He gave me a look like, what am i chopped liver? So we talked about how my parents unreliability towards me colored my view of the world, and how ts reliability changed that view for me. So the work can be very subtle. Stopdog you are not wrong in thinking things may be being done to you. But i think trying to control or even count the ramifications would be impossible. Its like contracting for electrical service in your house - who knows how you will use that electricity? l
  #5  
Old Jun 18, 2015, 11:50 AM
Perna's Avatar
Perna Perna is offline
Pandita-in-training
 
Member Since: Sep 2006
Location: Maryland
Posts: 27,289
I'm sure T viewed the work differently, especially at the beginning. I think the real work is the growing closer together about one's view of the work so by the end of therapy both people are on the "same" page. It is kind of like two horses learning to work in tandem; at first they have different jobs, therapist horse is trying to match themselves to client horse and mitigate some of client's lunges in the wrong direction so that the therapy cart does not turn over but as client horse settles down and realizes this tandem work does not interfere with who s/he is, that bad things are not happening (cart turning over or therapist horse trying to force client horse in a "different" direction) and starts to understand what is wanted, is calm enough to pay better attention to the whole, then matching therapist's steps forward can occur and trusting therapist occurs to when a change of pace happens (going from walking to trotting to running) client horse can catch on faster and the work goes smoother.
__________________
"Never give a sword to a man who can't dance." ~Confucius
Thanks for this!
unaluna
  #6  
Old Jun 18, 2015, 01:12 PM
stopdog stopdog is offline
underdog is here
 
Member Since: Sep 2011
Location: blank
Posts: 35,154
Quote:
Originally Posted by hankster View Post
. Stopdog you are not wrong in thinking things may be being done to you. But i think trying to control or even count the ramifications would be impossible. Its like contracting for electrical service in your house - who knows how you will use that electricity? l
I know I am right that they try to do stuff to you without consent - they admit it in their books. I have a belief I can prevent it if not control it. And I do know how I will generally use electricity too.
__________________
Please NO @

Selfishness is not living as one wishes to live, it is asking others to live as one wishes to live.
Oscar Wilde
Well Behaved Women Seldom Make History - Laurel Thatcher Ulrich
Pain is inevitable. Suffering is optional.
  #7  
Old Jun 18, 2015, 01:45 PM
ScarletPimpernel's Avatar
ScarletPimpernel ScarletPimpernel is offline
Wise Elder
 
Member Since: Nov 2013
Location: US
Posts: 9,025
I think if you and your T have different views of "the work" then it would be best to sit down and talk about that. Probably have a goal setting session too. You can't be on the same page as someone else if you don't tell them. They aren't mind readers.
__________________
"Odium became your opium..." ~Epica
  #8  
Old Jun 18, 2015, 01:46 PM
divine1966's Avatar
divine1966 divine1966 is offline
Legendary Wise Elder
 
Member Since: Dec 2014
Location: US
Posts: 23,224
My therapy seems much less complicated than what I am reading on here. We don't discuss "therapy" in therapy. I am just talking about what I have on my mind ( typically areas where I need improvement) and we sometimes discuss and sometimes I need very specific suggestions ( For example I don't sleep well and t helps me with specific strategies as I don't want Meds ). Sometimes there are some painful things to discuss etc we don't discuss "work" per se.

I am not sure what different views t might be having on what I am doing in life. things I need to improve on take time. T knows and I know. These are things I came to therapy with. Not like she pointed them out to me. I doubt she expects me to do something much differently

Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
  #9  
Old Jun 18, 2015, 01:53 PM
brillskep brillskep is offline
Poohbah
 
Member Since: Dec 2013
Location: Europe
Posts: 1,256
My therapist and I view therapeutic work pretty much the same. We do have our differences too of course, and even the few differences make it somewhat harder to work together. Other than that, we believe in pretty much the same type of therapy. I can't see myself working well with a therapist going a different direction than I am, at least certainly not in the long run.
  #10  
Old Jun 18, 2015, 02:02 PM
MusicMike's Avatar
MusicMike MusicMike is offline
Veteran Member
 
Member Since: May 2013
Location: Los Angeles, CA
Posts: 540
Quote:
Originally Posted by emptyspace View Post
.
Do you think your T views "the work" differently than you do?
Who's perspective is more accurate?

For example, you might see showing up for appointments as "the work," but your T might see it as working through the transference that is making it hard for you to show up at therapy.

Do you think that the difference in views could cause problems in the therapeutic relationship?
I'm not clear on what you are saying about the work. First, apparently you are saying it is hard for you to show up to therapy? Why is that, from your perspective?

Second, do you believe there are any transference emotions? If not, is that why you disagree that working through them is the work of therapy? Or are there transference emotions but you believe they don't need to be worked through?
  #11  
Old Jun 18, 2015, 06:45 PM
FranzJosef FranzJosef is offline
Member
 
Member Since: Feb 2015
Location: New Zealand
Posts: 208
I would expect that T and patient must inevitably see it differently.
It's like the blind men and the elephant. Both sides are right but no one sees the full picture.
  #12  
Old Jun 18, 2015, 07:51 PM
Crescent Moon's Avatar
Crescent Moon Crescent Moon is offline
Grand Poohbah
 
Member Since: Apr 2012
Posts: 1,565
Quote:
Originally Posted by stopdog View Post
I know I am right that they try to do stuff to you without consent - they admit it in their books. I have a belief I can prevent it if not control it. And I do know how I will generally use electricity too.
I haven't read many books on the subject, and I am very interested in hearing about the types of things they deliberately do to us without our consent. You often talk about it.. and I haven't been able to figure out what kinds of things they might do.
__________________
  #13  
Old Jun 18, 2015, 07:55 PM
Anonymous43207
Guest
 
Posts: n/a
My t uses the phrases "the work" and "the process" often. I think that in the beginning I saw it differently than she did because I just really didn't get it yet I guess. We're pretty much on the same page now. Although, she often used to say when I would thank her for her help that "You do all the work, all I do is show up" but I don't believe that for a minute. I know it is work putting up with me as a client!
  #14  
Old Jun 18, 2015, 09:24 PM
Restin's Avatar
Restin Restin is offline
Veteran Member
 
Member Since: Apr 2003
Location: Central Florida, USA
Posts: 550
My T said recently that she rarely brings up "inner child" transference directly with clients because they don't know how to do it. I don't know how it's possible to work through a transference relationship without discussing it, but I suppose my t knows what she's doing. I think maybe it's the nurturing, empathic relating that leads to improvement. I guess it depends on whether a patient can delve deeply into himself, or maybe has taken psychology in college and knows the terminology. Therapists can work on different levels with different clients, in other words.
  #15  
Old Jun 19, 2015, 09:55 AM
AncientMelody AncientMelody is offline
Grand Member
 
Member Since: Sep 2014
Location: Michigan
Posts: 901
My "work" is pretty straightforward and my psychiatrist and I are on the same page with it. Primarily the "work" is Cognitive Behavioral Therapy techniques and other journaling. Self care as well: exercise, getting enough sleep, learning boundaries w/ people pleasing and when to say no. Taking my meds as prescribed.
  #16  
Old Jun 19, 2015, 11:01 AM
dismantle.repair's Avatar
dismantle.repair dismantle.repair is offline
Member
 
Member Since: Feb 2011
Posts: 387
I think it might be perspective..

She says the 'work' is different per client. It's a product of the therapeutic relationship that we must foster together, as well as the goals we set. I think she put more effort into this than I did.
__________________

Does your T view "the work" differently than you do?
Reply
Views: 1066

attentionThis is an old thread. You probably should not post your reply to it, as the original poster is unlikely to see it.




All times are GMT -5. The time now is 08:12 PM.
Powered by vBulletin® — Copyright © 2000 - 2025, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.




 

My Support Forums

My Support Forums is the online community that was originally begun as the Psych Central Forums in 2001. It now runs as an independent self-help support group community for mental health, personality, and psychological issues and is overseen by a group of dedicated, caring volunteers from around the world.

 

Helplines and Lifelines

The material on this site is for informational purposes only, and is not a substitute for medical advice, diagnosis or treatment provided by a qualified health care provider.

Always consult your doctor or mental health professional before trying anything you read here.