[Ellahmae]

How detailed are you in discussing trauma with your therapist?
I guess I'm conflicted on what "details" I should/can share?
I can share everything but does it matter? Would it help? Should I?

How detailed are you in discussing trauma with your therapist?
I guess I'm conflicted on what "details" I should/can share?
I can share everything but does it matter? Would it help? Should I?

[Leah123]

It helps me tremendously to have shared certain details, because it's a release and I can have someone share the pain with me. I am explicit at times.

I think trauma-oriented therapists are extremely careful not to push clients to share, because the push, or feeling forced, can be retraumatizing- trauma work is a lot about letting clients be in charge, to counteract the loss of control during the trauma. So for us as clients, it can sometimes feel like maybe they do not want to hear, when that's not the case.

So the real issue for me is do you feel more in control and more relieved if you share, or better if you don't, and that should be your only concern in my mind. Because your therapist is trained and willing to listen to anything and it's all about doing what's most supportive for you.

[Ellahmae]

T is a trauma oriented therapist and everything you wrote makes perfect sense, thank you. It does seem as though she doesn't want to hear but she also says she'll listen to whatever I want to tell her, but it's my time frame and she won't pry. In my mind that's conflicting and confusing to me and with my other 'stuff' I have to know which one is right because I don't want to pick the wrong one.

So the real issue for me is do you feel more in control and more relieved if you share, or better if you don't, and that should be your only concern in my mind. This is a good question for me to ponder. I don't know.

[stopdog]

I actually have little trouble recounting what I know. The therapist is other and does not matter so telling her is, for me, not a problem.
She has been a bit critical of me, however, because she seems to think I don't recount with enough emoting - her criticism has not been about detail. I have no idea how to do it differently or emote more where I have none to emote with.

[Ellahmae]

I wish I could remove the poll :/ Oh, well. Or change the options at least.

I voted other because it varies I guess. Sometimes a general overview is fine; other times we delve into detail when it seems warranted.

I don't think you have to pick apart every trauma in minute detail. I wouldn't have been able to do that anyway as it was so long-term and recurring. So T's get the general overview mostly. On occasion I will suffer a very specific flashback about a very specific incident and that is when we might go into greater detail.

My T's never were big believers in rehashing trauma just for the sake of rehashing it, so if we did explore something, we had a very specific reason to do so, only explored as was needed for that particular purpose and moved on. They were very wary of the danger of retraumatization.

[Ellahmae]

Originally Posted by lolagrace

I voted other because it varies I guess. Sometimes a general overview is fine; other times we delve into detail when it seems warranted.

I don't think you have to pick apart every trauma in minute detail. I wouldn't have been able to do that anyway as it was so long-term and recurring. So T's get the general overview mostly. On occasion I will suffer a very specific flashback about a very specific incident and that is when we might go into greater detail.

My T's never were big believers in rehashing trauma just for the sake of rehashing it, so if we did explore something, we had a very specific reason to do so, only explored as was needed for that particular purpose and moved on. They were very wary of the danger of retraumatization.

I agree, I am just stuck between the basics only or nothing at all. T doesn't want to rehash or re-traumatize she is very careful of that. Thank you for sharing your thoughts it's helpful. I'm just new to all of this so I feel like I don't know what I'm doing or should be doing or sharing or what's right and what's wrong.

[Leah123]

There is no right or wrong, there is what feels best to you internally. If you have a photo type image in mind that's haunting you, you could share it in explicit detail to get it out if you wanted. If you want help to mentally burn that photo instead and get it out of your consciousness that way, you can do that too. If you want to say it's bothering you very generally just so you two both know you're troubled, do that.

It's all about what you need to feel better and heal.

[Leah123]

P.S. I will say that sharing does sometimes cause symptom flare-ups for us with PTSD. But the point of that is to come to terms with the event, heal from it, and thus be able to put it in perspective so it won't have that power anymore. We can be sad, upset, etc. or whatever feelings we have, but not haunted or traumatized, and find a way to make meaning of it through growth, however we are inspired to do that.

[unaluna]

There may be different aspects of an incident. My uncle used to - lets say - publicly embarrass me, but my mother didnt protect me even when she had the opportunity. So those became two different things to PROCESS, like two different storylines or traumas. The one with my mother eventually became more important than the one with my uncle in the story of my life.