The Couch 102, Buckle My Shoe!

I think you're onto something there...

Maybe you need to go back. Maybe focus on what it is she is possibly trying to get you to face by not meeting all your needs/desires...

I'm not going back any time soon, that's for sure. I want to explore the "always chasing mother figures who hurt me" theory with The Countess.

Sounds like a good plan. Just be careful not to create another hurting mother figure in The Countess.
(Do they know about the names you give them btw? That's kind of interesting in itself...)

Madame T does, but that was an accident. I copied something I posted here and forgot to translate.

As for The Countess, you may be sure I'm watching her very carefully.

When did doctors stop knocking on the door before entering an examination room?

I mean, I wasn't not wearing undergotchies or anything, but sheesh.

the term undergotchies is so awful to me

My doctor definitely still knocks before entering.

CE, Maybe closure will come when you sort out why it has been so elusive. The state of nonclosure might be serving some purpose for you. Maybe its some kind of coping mechanism you could replace with a healthier choice. I'm rooting for you.

I'm so sorry. I lost a pup who was like that to me to cancer last year and it's still heart breaking.

Blame unaluna for that. Although I guess I'm the one who keeps mentioning it...

I need help!!!
I have been looking for a job closer to home with winter coming. However, it was offered to me to be trained to close back of house. Im debating counter offering that if I train to close back of house that they train me for cash register. And that they get me certified in all that I do so I get a raise. That would cert me for everything and put me one step closer to shift supervisor which would be a step up and another raise. All the job I've applied to are minimum wage and my job now started me at $9.00 an hour. Plus they'd work around my school and I would still get what I need in hours which no other place will guarantee me. I'm torn.

What do I do?

Im sorrrrryyyy!!!! !

I know you've said you don't like working there. Do you think you'd feel better in a different position there? It seems like it could help your career to take this promotion. And if you could work on register, that would help you be prepared for other jobs, too. But if you're totally miserable there, then that's something to consider, too. Though if they'll work around your school hours and still give you the hours you need...that could make it worth it, even if it's not your ideal job and a bit of a drive. Plus there's the whole "devil you know" aspect, where you may not love where you are now, but at least you know it--you don't know what you'd encounter somewhere else. One option would be to try out the promotion and see how it goes--you can still always choose to go elsewhere...but if you get more training, that would increase your options.

Not really a promotion in itself right but would put me in line for one. The move Im making would be more lateral. Im gonna stay if my counter offer is accepted. Called tonight and talked to her...she's gonna run it by the GM.

A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush!

Just be careful of any promises of future payoff. If it were me, I would take whatever position has the most immediate benefit.

I'm looking for new work too and I'm trying to be more strategic and less reactive than I have been in the past.

Good luck!!!

No promotion promised in the future. But I still think where Im at is where I belong for now.

Probably. On the other hand, it could just be that I'm putting off a difficult choice. I might be in the "Bargaining" phase of grief.

The later stages are supposed to be Anger, Bargaining, Depression and Acceptance. But then I flip out of Acceptance back to Anger and so on round the loop.

Thanks for your input!

This sounds like an excellent plan!

You are always entitled to make a counter offer. Unfortunately they can always say no. But if you don't push yourself forward, who will?

If you don't beat the bushes occasionally, you'll never have more than one bird. (No offense, Growlycat!)

Just going to nap on the couch for a bit, -I don't snore (or dribble )
Sent a loooong email to T this morning about ugh stuff. Now begins the wait for the reply. Possibly days. Can't actually remember if she said she is going to respond actually....
Happy bonfire night to those that do!

Dropped the kids off with the stbx this morning and then took a yoga class. Now all I seem to be good for is sitting around crying. I have a boatload of stuff to do (including clean the litter box, it stinks to high heaven...) but I don't feel like doing a damn thing. I'm supposed to call my mother too, and I REALLY do not want to do that... My mother's idea of being supportive is to tell me that I shouldn't let things get to me:/

CE, I don't know about those five stages of grief. They seem to have no rhyme or reason to them - I flip between them all the time in no particular order. Well, at least I'm not in denial anymore I suppose

Will someone please tell me why I don't own a comfy pair of sweatpants? I can't go to the store in my robe... Or can I...

Presently really being bothered by PTSD. One event feels like it's happening again and the memories of the torture I went through are running through my head in a constant loop. This sucks..

My big accomplishment so far today is sorting thru some laundry. And i duct taped a laundry basket. That was kinda fun. Maybe i'll do some more sorting. Eventually it will all be done, right? Theoretically?.

I finally found something to wear that is not my robe. My big achievement for the day

Finally finally got my resume together this week and even got an initial phone interview within 2 hrs of applying online.

Yes. They might be phases but to describe them as stages implies a linear ordering and direction that simply isn't true.