The Couch 102, Buckle My Shoe!

So. To add to my three-front war, I took my cat to the vet today and she has cancer, which has already spread pretty far.

This is the cat who's been with me through a lot...everything really, since I started feeding her as a stray kitten my last semester of college and the day after I graduated she stowed away in my car for the drive home. (Gotta keep the food supply nearby, I guess.)

I guess she's old, and outlived her life expectancy, but drat, I want her around for as long as possible.

((ATAT))

Why do i have thoughts like how would Yoda convince a colony of penguins to join the Jedis? Why can't i have thoughts like "That spot really needs a hall table there." Apparently its what everybodiy else thinks...according to my ex-parents-in-law.

There is so much I could be doing instead of thinking about what would happen if you crossed Beyonce with a pig.....

*offers hugs* it sucks when there are sessions like this! I hope your next session can be more useful to you.

All the noise is becoming disorientating. I can't keep still and concentrate.

Wow...long time off couch.

I am too behind to catch up, so I shall enter back in here.

No CVS tonight. Have it tomorrow night though. Then every day until Wed.

Corporate is doing away with all the 24 hour stores in my store's district and making them regular hour stores. That means pharmay closing at 9ish. Less hours, as weekends will be reduced too. To make up for it, I picked up an extra job. The school board needed a teacher for a homebound student for math, for 1 hour a week, so I signed myself up. He lives 10 minutes away from school job, so I can go one day a week directly from school job. Called his mom earlier tonight...Mondays work best for her, so I agreed. Problem was I have CVS right after school job next 2 Mondays, but I can't put off the student. So, I texted some of my co-workers to see if they could cover my first hour at CVS and I just come late. None could...so I called the pharm manager and he said they should be able to make due the next 2 weeks with me coming in an hour later than scheduled. Then from here on out, I will just insist that I not be scheduled before 6:30 on Mondays if at all.

The kid I will be teaching is severely mentally handicapped, so I went out after work today to get manipulatves to teach geometry with. As well his IEP goal has to do with counting money, so even though that is not a geometry topic I also have to make sure I work on that with him. I bought some play money at the teacher store to use to count. I also picked up some basic money and geometry reproducible workbooks to use, since there is no set curriculum for the class he is in. I just have to cover money and basic geometry. Even though he is in 12th grade, the geometry course he is registered for is not proofs and regualar high school geom topics. I am basically teaching 3rd or 4th grade geometry topics to the kid. It should be fun. I also planned the lessons for the first two hours. I just need to make copies when I get to school tomorrow.

Bleach it and dye it pink

I really like this suggestion!

...or purple

(((BPA)))
Do you need to call someone? It sounds like the thoughts are getting a little out of hand...

omg did anyone know that song in the commercial "Mail Myself to You" is a Woody Guthrie song from 1962?? Mind blown!

Shhhh. Secret squirrel. I'm fine. Its warm adn s soft nda it tickles.

I bet Ike and LC would have known.

ATAT-I am sorry to hear about your cat.

Are good T's hard to find in Pheonix AZ? Exploring a job there. Still early.

Too late, im done!

(((@@&cat)))

(((Squirrel))) if you dont get the award for squirrel of the year, then i dont know what!!

Can you give me a hint as to what I should do or where I should look to get closure? I am not prepared merely to wait for it!

I'm trying to make an appointment to see The Countess. I'll ask her about it.

ATAT, I'm so sorry about your cat, too.

Interview at 11am EST. nervous...very nervous! See how it goes? I got a little bit before I gotta go. Really hoping for yesterdays job to pan out...just gotta be patient! Yesterday is soooo close to home.

Well, I have a great one

(Come to Phoenix. We have cookies! And wine )

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Shift your focus. Think of the ways she benefited you. And what you have learned and how you have grown from all the negative stuff that happened.
Accept that she will never be what you want her to be - you can't make anyone be what you want them to be - anymore than you should let anyone try to make you into what they want.
In short, accept her humanness. And yours. And be grateful for both.

I'm thinking of the stuff you posted after the last time you saw her. You seemed to have closure then, but I suspect over time things happened that led you to focus on the negative stuff again. You might need to see her periodically until you can hold onto the positive on your own.
Or perhaps you can work through it with The Countess. I was pretty successful working through my disappointments with previous T with my current T. You do have to be willing to accept that your perspective may be flawed though.

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BPA? Are you doing alright today? Kinda worried about you...

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Hey all interview went well today but not enough hours. Ugh!

I think this drug is finally almost out of my system, still feel weird though. Wish pdoc would call back. T isn't too thrilled with her, unsure if I should look for another one.

She may be more valuable as an enemy than as a therapist.

ETA

Oops! I didn't mean to edit this. I thought I was replying.