Update and apology

Hey guys,

It's been a long time since I've posted. This post is for the people that still remember me and/or have followed me in the past. I've never forgotten you guys and I just wanted to give a brief update as well as an apology.

I've been doing a lot better. I'm still seeing LCM, but our relationship is so much healthier and it is no longer harming me at all. I don't feel pain because of the limits of our relationship and I don't remember the last time I've felt super insecure about it. I saw a trauma therapist about 6 months ago that I liked, but I currently can't afford the copay so I'm not seeing her currently. I still definitely need trauma work, so I'm working towards that goal. I'm currently about to graduate college and I'm looking for work.

I also wanted to apologize. I have had a history of stirring up drama on here and triggering a lot of people. I was wrong to do that and I'm sincerely sorry to everyone that was genuinely trying to help me. I found myself seeking attention an awful lot on here and frequently forgetting about the feelings of the other people on here.

I'm not sure if I'm going to be hanging around these boards the same way I used to. PC has been super helpful for me in a lot of ways, particularly in finding support in my treatment. However, I also feel like being here has triggered my BPD in a lot of ways. During my break, I've felt quite a bit more secure in my relationships with both LCM and my friendships as well as feeling good about not being triggering to a bunch of people who are also struggling online.

So maybe I'll be around a little bit. I haven't decided yet. I just wanted to let you guys know that I still exist, I still appreciate you guys, and I'm sorry for the drama I've caused in the past.

Wishing you well growlithing, been wondering about you too.

Glad to head you are graduating and seeking job. I hope job search is successful. Congrats on upcoming graduation woohoo!!!! Job well done

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Hi there! I looked at your profile not long ago. I'm glad you are doing well!

I am so happy you are doing well!
Last time you were here things sounded bad and your absence was worrisome.
Glad you are Ok and sound stronger than ever.

It's good to hear you're doing well

Hi! I was just thinking about you the other day! Glad you checked in! Hope you can stick around some. (((Growli)))

I've also been wondering whether you're ok. So glad to hear you're doing well and making such healthy choices! Congratulations on your upcoming graduation

Hey Growli! That's all really good to hear, I'm so so pleased for you that you're finding healthy relationships. Hope everything continues moving on up!

glad to see you are doing well

Glad to hear you are doing better, and graduating! So happy to hear from you!!

Growli - That is too awesome to hear! I am glad you are feeling much better, that is wonderful

And I get what you are saying about this board too.

You sound so much better. Good self care in removing yourself from PC for awhile. I agree that it can cause some people to have greater problems -- too much input that isn't always helpful can certainly create more problems than it solves. Congrats on graduation and good luck on the job hunt.

It's SO good to hear from you! I know I have put a post or two on here asking about you since you've been gone. I've been worried about you.... I'm glad things appear to be looking up!!

Thanks everyone for the support. Sorry for leaving you guys high and dry for a long time. I should have said something when I left, but I don't think I was really intending to leave for as long as I did. I think I was planning on taking a couple of weeks off, but it turned into months. It wasn't my intention to worry anyone. I'm safe and have been safe the whole time.

You've nothing to apologise for. You did what you needed to do for your own well-being and that takes a lot of maturity and strength.

What a great post growli! Have definitely wondered how you were doing. So glad to hear that the relationship with your LC is a lot healthier, and so proud to hear that you went to see a trauma therapist for a bit!

Good luck on finishing up the last bit of college!