[Inner_Firefly]

I think I will nicely and politely tell T I'm mad at her. I don't want her to feel criticized or accused.

I worry about not being as considerate to her as she is to me. She is always tactful, and never gets angry at me, even when I do something to offend her.

However a part of me also wishes to let it all out uncensored. Maybe I will mix both styles.

[Cinnamon_Stick]

I have gotten angry at my T and I don't come right out and say that I am angry until after. I answer her questions like a smart ***. I think she knows when I feel angry. She has told me 'You seemed angry at me when we talked". I always say I am sorry. I don't get angry to the point where I yell or throw things or whatever. Its just a little touch of angry. I feel like its bad to get angry at a T. Am I along in this?

I voted other. Most of the time I just hold it in. One time T did confront me - he felt like I was upset with him. I denied it to his face, but later told him how I really felt in an email. I was nice about it.

[doyoutrustme]

All of the above, depending on my mood.

[AllHeart]

Rarely do I get mad at my t, or anyone. When I do, it's short lived and I hold it in. I might be extra quiet during session for a little bit but that's about it.

[magno11789]

Most of the time I don't express anger to my T. So far when I have been mad she asked me if I was mad at her. I usually tell her no and then email her after the session telling her I was mad.

I just talk to him about it. I'm not one to get angry very easily and but it happens. I just talk it through with him. It's never been anything huge; just little things on rare occasions.

[Nix]

I don't think I have a good enough relationship with my T to express anger if I did feel it. I have only seen her a few times so far and can usually only have an appt. every 3 months unless there's an emergency. I don't usually express anger to anyone, though, other than venting at home, minus a few occasions where I was kind of out of control.

[stopdog]

The first therapist and I may not agree on how circumspect and tactful I am. I consider myself tactfully direct and admirably succinct.
It does not usually happen that I am angry with second one.

[atisketatasket]

Despite No. 1's amazing ability to irritate me, she has never actually made me angry. No. 2 is so obviously well-intentioned that it's even harder to be angry with her. So, rarely/never.

Other people in my life hear about it, though.

[Myrto]

My therapist has said several times that my "to go emotion" is anger.
I get angry quickly but it doesn't last. I'm surprised aat the number of people here who hold it in. I don't hold it in at all: I either blurt it out or write an email expressing my anger directly or I use passive agressive methods.
When I'm mad it's usually because I'm hurt so I want to punish my therapist and hurt her as well: passive agressive is usually the way to go even if she often remains unflappable.

[unaluna]

At times like these, i look at therapy as schooling in how to have the difficult conversation. I WANT to run away, but he keeps poking and prodding, and finally we get thru it. It helps if you believe the t is on your side, not working against you. Theres enough rebellion or resistance built in to change or difference to begin with; i couldnt do this with an adversary.

[nottrustin]

I have never been angry with T. I rarely get angry with anybody. There was one time with T she said something that bothered me. So at the next session I asked her about what she said and realized it was a miscommunication and let it go.

[NowhereUSA]

I responded "other".

I've expressed anger a variety of ways. When I've found myself frustrated or upset and I'm able to access my skills, I've used "I" statements. When I've been in the darkest pits of my depression and I just wanted him to shut the eff up, I screamed it at him. I yelled, I cussed him out, I called him names, and then I left. I've emailed with tact.

In general I try to be tactful. But seven years leaves a lot of history and a lot of experiences to cover.

[ruh roh]

I usually assume that I'm angry about something that came up while my therapist was sitting there saying something not at all anger-provoking, so I try to work out what it was that set me off. If I need to talk to her about it, I talk about how X made me feel, not how she made me feel. I guess that's using "I" statements, but I don't really think of it that way. It's more a matter of trying to get to the bottom of what upset me. My therapist is just not the type to be insensitive or hurtful, so if I feel myself reacting to something she's said or done, I have to ask what that thing is underneath. It saves on apologies later.

[colorsofthewind12]

I cannot wait for my next session to yell at my therapist. I refuse to analyze my anger or be tactful-so done with that bull shi*. I just want to "give it to him".

[UglyDucky]

Originally Posted by Cinnamon_Stick

I have gotten angry at my T and I don't come right out and say that I am angry until after. I answer her questions like a smart ***. I think she knows when I feel angry. She has told me 'You seemed angry at me when we talked". I always say I am sorry. I don't get angry to the point where I yell or throw things or whatever. Its just a little touch of angry. I feel like its bad to get angry at a T. Am I along in this?

I tell my T when I'm angry with him, but nicely (don't believe a T deserves to be belittled). He's told me that knowing when I'm angry with him gives him more information in terms of what's going on with me at the time and gives us the chance to understand what's really causing the anger. Sometimes, it isn't my T at all.

[iheartjacques]

I walked out once after he asked me to come in half an hour early. And he was late!
I was furious for two weeks.
I waited for him to apologise. He started blasting on with his usual opening questions.
So I said I just want to say I think know it was rude of you to ask me to come in early and then be late. And I cancelled coffee with my friend to see him. Then he apologised. But now he knows I can get very mad. Though he said I've always been very polite. I've never yelled at hI'm, hit him or sworn at him, even thoughost my mind plays out thesee scenarios while sitting there

Sometimes i just politely say i am mad at her. And there are other times she and i have had loud, angry fits of shouting at each other. She is a safe person to get mad at and it is safe for her to get mad at me also.

[Cinnamon_Stick]

Originally Posted by UglyDucky

I tell my T when I'm angry with him, but nicely (don't believe a T deserves to be belittled). He's told me that knowing when I'm angry with him gives him more information in terms of what's going on with me at the time and gives us the chance to understand what's really causing the anger. Sometimes, it isn't my T at all.

My T says the same thing. That when I tell her that I am angry (or any other feeling) she learns more about me. More times than not, its not my T that I am angry with. Its myself.

[spring2014]

my therapist rarely get angry with me . she is very empathetic towards me cuz I know she is by my side .

[ScarletPimpernel]

Simple. I tell her directly that I'm mad at her. Then we talk.

[Pennster]

I feel like I'm kind of blunt about it, but we get on really well so he's told me he appreciates it that I just come out and say when I am angry with him. It doesn't happen all that often though.

[Out There]

I don't think I've ever been angry with my T. I did bring up one thing I wasn't very happy about and got a mature and considered response. I was apprehensive about bringing it up as mature and considered responses have not been the norm for me , but my T is the model for healthy and sane behavior.

I try not to. Sometimes I tell him later, after the anger has subsided. Sometimes he notices. And sometimes I fail to stop myself from telling him. But I don't express it, as in acting angrily (however that would look - I'm not sure.)