[Argonautomobile]

Has your T ever been concerned and you just didn't see why? Tell me about it.

[ilikecats]

I don't think a person necessarily needs to be concerned just because their T is. My T has been concerned about me before at times when I wasn't. I think part of this can be because a therapist doesn't know what you're thinking, and doesn't know for sure that a person is safe. But the person does know how they feel and what they would do, so they would know whether or not they will be safe, even though the T can't know this for sure.

[stopdog]

I cannot imagine me caring if the therapist was concerned or not concerned. I would hope she could refrain from telling me about either.

[Out There]

Originally Posted by ilikecats

I don't think a person necessarily needs to be concerned just because their T is. My T has been concerned about me before at times when I wasn't. I think part of this can be because a therapist doesn't know what you're thinking, and doesn't know for sure that a person is safe. But the person does know how they feel and what they would do, so they would know whether or not they will be safe, even though the T can't know this for sure.

I tend to agree with this. What bothers and concerns one person does not necessarily apply to another. I would discuss it with my T if this happened. I have to say I don't always think my T sees a cigar as just a cigar.. We don't always agree. But that's fun.

my psychologist and psychiatrist keep telling me they are "concerned" about me i am not so much but i think perhaps that is because i place no value on my supposed existence. they say they do but i still dont understand why. then they say i just have to trust them then i think they are lying to try and make me feel better i still dont believe i am of any importance to anyone.

[Elkino]

This did happen to me. I was looking for a medical treatment while being in a lot of pain and didn't seem to find any help. My T almost started crying while telling me how concerned she was, while (for once) I was still having hope and didn't care too much. Which of course doesn't mean her being concerned wasn't valid. I guess it was.

[Focus62]

My new T has told me she is concerned/worried that I am having nightmares nearly every night. I am unconcerned because this just seems like a normal part of life for me now... I'm not quite sure why she is so worried about it. I think maybe she thinks the nightmares will push me closer to the edge? Maybe once she gets to know me better she won't be so concerned, but I think eden is also on to something... a lot of times people are in therapy because they don't value themselves as highly as they should. Good Ts usually try to build us up a bit and help us to see our value, which is perhaps why they express so much concern for our well-being and why we don't always understand it.

[atisketatasket]

Originally Posted by Elkino

This did happen to me. I was looking for a medical treatment while being in a lot of pain and didn't seem to find any help. My T almost started crying while telling me how concerned she was, while (for once) I was still having hope and didn't care too much. Which of course doesn't mean her being concerned wasn't valid. I guess it was.

Me too. When I got sick last year they were both more concerned than I was, probably because I was in obvious pain and it must have looked worse than it was.

Sometimes they're less concerned than I am, like I thought my number of nightmares was high but they seemed uninterested.

[Argonautomobile]

Originally Posted by ilikecats

I don't think a person necessarily needs to be concerned just because their T is. My T has been concerned about me before at times when I wasn't. I think part of this can be because a therapist doesn't know what you're thinking, and doesn't know for sure that a person is safe. But the person does know how they feel and what they would do, so they would know whether or not they will be safe, even though the T can't know this for sure.

This is a very good point! I suppose it's sort of obvious that a T could hardly be expected to have the 'total picture' of a situation from 50 minutes a week (or month!) One would hope they'd at least get a representative sample, but I suppose that can't always be expected to happen. Thanks for this!

Originally Posted by stopdog

I cannot imagine me caring if the therapist was concerned or not concerned. I would hope she could refrain from telling me about either.

Thanks for this, SD! Would you be terribly offended if I told you I sometimes read your posts in my 'Professor Snape' voice? Not that I think you spend your evenings dressing up in funny clothes and making nefarious dealings to honor the decades-old memory of a teenage girl who didn't love you back...It's more a word choice thing. Anyway, thanks for this!

Originally Posted by Out There

I tend to agree with this. What bothers and concerns one person does not necessarily apply to another. I would discuss it with my T if this happened. I have to say I don't always think my T sees a cigar as just a cigar.. We don't always agree. But that's fun.

I appreciate your reply! It's all very hum-drum, I suppose, and not objectively surprising...I'm just not used to disagreeing with my T and feel a little put-out about the whole thing. I'm sure we'll talk about it if it's still an issue in a couple weeks.

Originally Posted by eden1515

my psychologist and psychiatrist keep telling me they are "concerned" about me i am not so much but i think perhaps that is because i place no value on my supposed existence. they say they do but i still dont understand why. then they say i just have to trust them then i think they are lying to try and make me feel better i still dont believe i am of any importance to anyone.

Oh, Eden, I'm sorry you don't think you're important. I hope someday you do; it's quite a wonderful feeling, actually. If it makes you feel any better, I don't think your pdoc/tdoc are lying. I think Focus62 has hit the nail on the head here: sometimes T's value us more than we value ourselves, and are trying to show us we're important with their concern. Be safe!

Originally Posted by Elkino

This did happen to me. I was looking for a medical treatment while being in a lot of pain and didn't seem to find any help. My T almost started crying while telling me how concerned she was, while (for once) I was still having hope and didn't care too much. Which of course doesn't mean her being concerned wasn't valid. I guess it was.

Excellent point! A concern can be valid even if we don't share it...But does that mean our lack of concern is therefore invalid? A question for the ages. I', sorry your T had that response while you still had hope. I think I'd find myself pretty distressed in that situation.

Originally Posted by Focus62

My new T has told me she is concerned/worried that I am having nightmares nearly every night. I am unconcerned because this just seems like a normal part of life for me now... I'm not quite sure why she is so worried about it. I think maybe she thinks the nightmares will push me closer to the edge? Maybe once she gets to know me better she won't be so concerned, but I think eden is also on to something... a lot of times people are in therapy because they don't value themselves as highly as they should. Good Ts usually try to build us up a bit and help us to see our value, which is perhaps why they express so much concern for our well-being and why we don't always understand it.

I think Eden is on to something, too. I think I've experienced concern of this particular variety, (around issues of suicide/SI) and it did help me see that I was maybe not giving myself the value and credit I deserved. The current situation is rather the opposite, and I think that's why I'm so miffed by it...I'm in a good mood. T usually responds very well to my good moods. They put him in a good mood. And then we laugh and get nothing done. That's how it's supposed to work. Having him be concerned and start talking about meds and routine and blah blah boring felt rather like a rain on my parade.

Sorry, got off topic. Nightmares SUCK! I admire you for accepting them as part of your life. If I can offer some unsolicited advice, I've found weed brownies an effective sleep aid.

Originally Posted by atisketatasket

Me too. When I got sick last year they were both more concerned than I was, probably because I was in obvious pain and it must have looked worse than it was.

Sometimes they're less concerned than I am, like I thought my number of nightmares was high but they seemed uninterested.

Well that's aggravating. Having T express a concern you don't share might be irritating or perplexing, but having them NOT share a concern you have feels pretty invalidating. Sorry ya'll don't always see eye-to-eye.

But then, who does?

Thanks, all!

[Inner_Firefly]

Originally Posted by Argonautomobile

Has your T ever been concerned and you just didn't see why? Tell me about it.

Hi Argonautomobile, Hope you are OK. I have no stories to tell you but just wanted to send you some good luck.

[Argonautomobile]

Originally Posted by Inner_Firefly

Hi Argonautomobile, Hope you are OK.

Hi Inner Firefly! Always nice to hear your voice! Thanks for the virtual hug--those little ball guys are so cute. (much more attractive than the real thing jajaja)

I'm great! (for once). I think that's allowed. I'm oriented. I know who the President is and everything. T can suck my 's

[AllHeart]

Originally Posted by Argonautomobile

Hi Inner Firefly! Always nice to hear your voice! Thanks for the virtual hug--those little ball guys are so cute. (much more attractive than the real thing jajaja)

I'm great! (for once). I think that's allowed. I'm oriented. I know who the President is and everything. T can suck my 's

This post made me smile...BIG! So glad to hear you are doing great, and, that you know who the President is. Thanks for sharing your cheer!!

[AnxiousGirl]

Loads of times.

My T was concerned about my eating habits (I would eat once a day) and I assured her that I wasn't doing it on purpose, but that I was just stressed and it was tough for me to eat more than once a day.

My T was also concerned when I said I dont go out much with friends or anything, and I said that it didn't bother me that much because I was able to just relax on my own and calm down.

I guess sometimes they get more worried than us.

The only reason most therapists get concerned about clients' safety is because of liability issues. I would be concerned if they felt they had to have me committed which is totally wrong in my opinion. Other than that i don't care if they claim to be "concerned." It's all fake anyway. That's what I think.

[Cinnamon_Stick]

There have been many times my T was concerned about me and each time I thought the situation was normal or its something that has gone on for a long time. Sometimes I can see why she is concerned and I learn from it.

[RedSun]

My T gets concerned about

*trigger*

My self harm. No, not for liability issues, but she thinks I don't take enough self care afterwards.
But it is, actually, okay. I know whats risky and what isn't. But it's kind of nice that she is concerned, and difficult to accept, all at the same time!

[Inner_Firefly]

Originally Posted by Argonautomobile

Hi Inner Firefly! Always nice to hear your voice! Thanks for the virtual hug--those little ball guys are so cute. (much more attractive than the real thing jajaja)

I'm great! (for once). I think that's allowed. I'm oriented. I know who the President is and everything. T can suck my 's

It's nice to hear you are cheerful and doing well. Is your T bugging you? I agree, I love those ball guys.

[Argonautomobile]

Originally Posted by AllHeart

This post made me smile...BIG! So glad to hear you are doing great, and, that you know who the President is. Thanks for sharing your cheer!!

Thanks! I think my cheerfulness is starting to annoy people in real life...jajaja

Originally Posted by AnxiousGirl

Loads of times.

My T was concerned about my eating habits (I would eat once a day) and I assured her that I wasn't doing it on purpose, but that I was just stressed and it was tough for me to eat more than once a day.

My T was also concerned when I said I dont go out much with friends or anything, and I said that it didn't bother me that much because I was able to just relax on my own and calm down.

I guess sometimes they get more worried than us.

Totally hear you on that one. It kind of sucks to be held to some objective standard like, "oh, people your age are supposed to go out every night" and you're over here all, thanks but no thanks--I've got a cup of cocoa and a nice book!

Originally Posted by puzzle_bug1987

The only reason most therapists get concerned about clients' safety is because of liability issues. I would be concerned if they felt they had to have me committed which is totally wrong in my opinion. Other than that i don't care if they claim to be "concerned." It's all fake anyway. That's what I think.

Haha, now There's an amusing thought! I can just see the inner monologue: "Ah, God, she's lost it. Bonkers. Sitting over there babbling about the oneness of the universe. Why is she bald? I hope this doesn't end in a lawsuit. Better note it in the chart-- *scribble scribble scribble*--There, that ought to cover it. Let's take a mood questionnaire just to be sure. Should have gone to art school."

Originally Posted by Cinnamon_Stick

There have been many times my T was concerned about me and each time I thought the situation was normal or its something that has gone on for a long time. Sometimes I can see why she is concerned and I learn from it.

I've had this experience before, too. Hindsight is 20/20, amiright?

Originally Posted by RedSun

My T gets concerned about

*trigger*

My self harm. No, not for liability issues, but she thinks I don't take enough self care afterwards.
But it is, actually, okay. I know whats risky and what isn't. But it's kind of nice that she is concerned, and difficult to accept, all at the same time!

I think it is kind of sweet when other people are concerned--I mean, I don't want to worry anyone or cause them pain, but it's nice to know someone cares, you're right. Thanks for your reply! And I agree--take care of yourself!

Originally Posted by Inner_Firefly

It's nice to hear you are cheerful and doing well. Is your T bugging you? I agree, I love those ball guys.

He thinks I'm hypomanic, I guess? Not bugging, exactly, just raining on my parade a bit, making me second-guess. Usually he's happy I'm happy, so it was just a little weird and been on my mind because of that. Thanks for asking! Hope you're doing well

There have been occasions when my T and Pdoc were more concerned about me than I was, and at times they were spot on about it. There was a time that my own insight into my level of functioning, my own insight about my condition was not very clear. With bipolar disorder, it isn't uncommon for a person to be heading into an episode -- depressive or manic -- and not realize they are really headed that way. That's one of the reasons having that objective observer/supporter to help monitor those kinds of changes is important. My T and Pdoc got to the point where they could sort of see the writing on the wall that I was headed toward a dangerous place, often much more clearly and much sooner than I could see it (or admit it). I think similar problems with insight come up with people dealing with thought disorders such as schizophrenia, etc. and having someone (even a friend or coworker who can stay pretty objective about things) is rather imperative for those of us who have truly experienced losing touch with reality at times.

[Argonautomobile]

Originally Posted by lolagrace

There have been occasions when my T and Pdoc were more concerned about me than I was, and at times they were spot on about it. There was a time that my own insight into my level of functioning, my own insight about my condition was not very clear. With bipolar disorder, it isn't uncommon for a person to be heading into an episode -- depressive or manic -- and not realize they are really headed that way. That's one of the reasons having that objective observer/supporter to help monitor those kinds of changes is important. My T and Pdoc got to the point where they could sort of see the writing on the wall that I was headed toward a dangerous place, often much more clearly and much sooner than I could see it (or admit it). I think similar problems with insight come up with people dealing with thought disorders such as schizophrenia, etc. and having someone (even a friend or coworker who can stay pretty objective about things) is rather imperative for those of us who have truly experienced losing touch with reality at times.

Well that doesn't make me feel any better!

I'm kidding. I think you make some excellent points here, and I'm very glad you've had people in your life looking out for you.

[stopdog]

Originally Posted by Argonautomobile

Thanks for this, SD! Would you be terribly offended if I told you I sometimes read your posts in my 'Professor Snape' voice? Not that I think you spend your evenings dressing up in funny clothes and making nefarious dealings to honor the decades-old memory of a teenage girl who didn't love you back...It's more a word choice thing. Anyway, thanks for this!

No worries. I embrace my inner Snape.

[Argonautomobile]

Can't sleep. Lots of energy/productivity. Increased sex drive. Racing thoughts. So happy and CREATIVE! You should see the pergola I built today. It's ****ing beautiful.

But how can it be mania if I'm aware of an exaggerated sense of well-being? Isn't the whole point that manic people don't know they're manic? I'm rational. I'm oriented. Is this just what happiness feels like?

T told me to call for ANY reason. I almost did this morning--but why? It's not like I want to be less happy, and, anyway, if you're calling to ask about your mood, doesn't that mean you have insight? And insight means you're not crazy?

He'll probably just tell me to go to my doctor. And we know how that goes--"Well your problem is probably that you smoke and drink and haven't had your pap-smear. So why don't you put on this paper gown and I'll have a look at your hoo-ha while lecturing you about your poor choices in life."

Yes! Fantastic! Let's do that!

No, let's not.

ahhhh

[Argonautomobile]

I mean, surely I can't have made it to (almost) 26 without a bipolar diagnosis if indeed I had (hypo)manic episodes in addition to my depression. These type of things don't just pop up overnight, right?

I mean, sure, this has happened before....But I did A LOT of drugs back then.

Why am I even complaining? I'm so sorry. Bleh. My bad. These things happen.

I do think you can have insight on being hypomanic with self awareness, which you seem to have in spades, Argo.

I have no direct experience with bipolar though, just some things peers with bipolar have told me.

Your doctor sounds like a nag. Urk pap smears and lectures!

[Argonautomobile]

Originally Posted by QuietMind

I do think you can have insight on being hypomanic with self awareness, which you seem to have in spades, Argo.

I have no direct experience with bipolar though, just some things peers with bipolar have told me.

Your doctor sounds like a nag. Urk pap smears and lectures!

Oh, thank you, QuietMind--I wish I had a quiet mind right now! I appreciate the info--will ask my T for some psychoeducation on the matter when I see him.

My Doctor wants to SAVE LIVES, dammit! How DARE we patients indulge our vices and neglect regular check-ups! Jajaja.

Thanks again!