The Couch 120: The Missing Element

How did you know I love George Formby?

That sounds awful, JD. I'm so sorry.....

I'm the last person to tell anyone to remain with their therapists (I'm in the midst of leaving mine myself for someone who hopefully seems a much better fit).

But, from what I've read of your posts, your T sounds really cool and attuned to you? I wonder if it's partly that he isn't getting what an awful space you're in? As in, you appear to be "functional" and so, he doesn't really get how much more support you might need?

I don't know what else to say except the rather cliched advice that everyone gets to perhaps talk it out? From your posts, it's sounded like what you have with your T is something truly rare -- I wonder then if you could imagine creating that same connection with another T or just going therapy-less? I don't know what your situation feels like to you but would either of those possibilities seem palatable to you?

Any way, do take care....

I went through this about 2.5-3 years into my time with T but I stuck it out, mainly because I didn't know where else to go, and things started to work out and talking a bit about it with T helped. The hardest bit was talking about it. Hugs. I used to dread going because I knew I would feel like **** after. It took months for it start to get better.

Instead of cleaning windows I cleaned the back deck instead.

I cleaned off my kitchen table. Well, half of it anyway. I don't know how it gets piled up with so much stuff all the time. I also grilled pork chops, and I think I'm going to make some cookies or something this afternoon maybe. Or bread. Actually yeah, bread sounds a lot better than cookies.

I'm still kinda on a little bit of a therapy high from earlier....

thank you, ive been thinking of taking a break or just leaving altogether. i havent mentioned this to him. also i am aware that all of this might just be my tunnel vision when i get depressed... in which i only see the bad things and ignore the good. my T is really cool and we work well together. honestly the thought of leaving him is painful. he has helped me immensely... if you all saw me 6 years ago i would be unrecognizable.

i think some of it is my paternal transference for him and realizing he is just a T, just another person...and he has his own children and family that i am not part of. i dont have many friends and only my mom and (mentally ill)sister as family. so i ampretty isolated. it feels really pathetic that the only person i really talk to during the week is my T.

it might also be my patterns too... of realizing how i care for someone and it hits me like a ton of bricks that it is impermanent (like everything is) so i avoid avoid avoid and try to back away and fade into the background

thanks for this. it's good to know i am not alone. im going to give it some time and see what happens... i dont know if i will tell my T. i'll think some more on that.. we meet on tuesday

Art Bread. bake bread. Yum.

I accidently came across reddit....Why?
On a totally random site they have section called "random"

Last night I had the strangest dream
The sky was dark and I could not see
Felt underwater when I tried to scream
When I heard the rooster I was finally free
-- "Pray for the Girls"

Hi Thor!
Good luck!

Does Nyan cat qualify as an astronaut cat? or just a space kitty/poptart hybrid?

Couldn't sleep last night (trouble staying asleep) and started the day tired. Went to a 12 step meeting, farmers market, spent time with two girls I mentor, rode my horse, picked a few dozen ears of corn...And now I am falling asleep in my chair. Corn would be best if I blanched/cut off the cob/froze it today. But it doesn't look likely.

i love nyan cat

Just realized (rather late, yes) the wisdom of eating bread to deal with the after-effects of speedy imbibing of copious amounts of distilled spirits. Then again, would be nice if the wisdom had extended to realizing that there are better ways to spend a Saturday. Oh well.

Got up to do a few things and came back to bed and now the new old dog has my blanket. Dang it. I really like that particular blanket. So do all the animals apparently.

hope you feel better soon

So I have been fairly stable for awhile now. The meds are helping a lot. But now, I feel guilty about going to therapy. Most of t's clients are two weeks. So I start thinking about other people could use my spot, or I could save money, I could stop asking people to watch my kids.
I don't want to stop therapy, I don't want to go less than once a week.. But my guilt tells me I should.

Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

Inconceivable! My teen is hunting Pokemon in the rain.

One of the girls downloaded Nyan cat: Lost in space onto my phone. I have more fun customising the interface than playing the game.

At least they are up and about.

I struggle with things like that too.

I called it. Very addicting so much that I walked three miles in 100 degree heat

I always thought that the benefit of me having the thumbs meant I got the blanket I wanted and the dog could take the other one. For my pets - they are willing to trade blankets for dog biscuits.