Couch 122 - Doin' what we do!

Yes, she is. Taking a break.

Cool whip?

Wool chip!

My colleague, Ms Bully berated me verbally, saying I don't think and I don't use my brain.

Worse, she sent a humiliating email reprimanding me with my external vendor cc'ed.

Normally when she berates me via email, she ccs my bosses. This time, of course she didn't...

I am seething and desire to self harm. I hate how she bullies me and how my bosses approve because they berate me too.

Can you forward the email to your boss? I think I'd do that. With an "FYI" on top
I know it's hard and this won't be very helpful but: Don't listen to these kind of people. They're wrong and they have no right to make you feel bad.

It might get me in more trouble, but I liked your suggestion and forwarded it privately to my boss with a hopefully neutral sentence:

"Hi boss,

I would appreciate it if Colleague had not cced Vendor in this email. Yesterday, I already acknowledged her points stated below."

It's difficult not to hate myself because her condescending scoldings occur regularly. I remain calm, polite and professional especially because some of my bosses reprimand me that way too.

It triggers this...deep sense of worthlessness because there's a kernel of truth in their words.

It's a struggle because I get vivid intrusive thoughts and images urging me towards self harming.

My partner told me to relax and focus on the positive and I'm usually stoic, but I shed tears already.

having my son back home with the dog and the mother. i want to just take my son away and have it just be the two of us and shelter him from all the negativity that comes from all the people in my life. he is just trying to survive and deal with being injured.

i feel so selfish and horrible this morning . i guess im not doing enough around here. im just so tired and not wanting to do anything .im just keeping my head above water here. after what my husband said i feel even worse .he has taken my sons dog out for walks a couple times when he gets home from work .i never asked him and i guess now he is feeling it is all to much and said he hopes my son gets a place soon .i know i need to do more around here and i am trying to but it all seems so hard and now without my husbands suport is sending me into a complete panic.im making myself sick

didnt mean to kill the couch

@granite
Please take care of yourself. You can't help your son if you're too worn out...

The couch has been quiet for the last day or so granite. You sure did not kill it. It was good to read an update from you just sorry that you are having s hard time. Still want to see pics of your crafty projects lol

It is impossible to kill the Couch. Even if someone did, it would return as a revenant.

I really liked that book. Has the conclusion been published?

QuietMind, I am so impressed that you stood up for yourself by sharing the email with your boss. You rock. If that colleague has problems with you, she can handle them professionally. The way she handled it is unprofessional and would make me furious as a boss. It was petty and unprofessional.

I hope your boss responded positively.

Granite, maybe this is too personal of a question, but is your son also your husband's son? Why does all this fall on you? Also, whatever your hateful, crazy mother does, is not your fault.

my husband is nott my sons farther but he has been a farther to him sense he was 5 years old. had always treated him like he was his own . except for discipline always seem to fall on me

Didn't even realize I was referencing that, too...was thinking of the French TV series, which I recommend to anyone who likes intelligent horror.

What's the mother doing there? Call the police!

she is not here .she just keeps trying to get a hold of me through various means

Don't you shield your husband from a lot of your problems? He knows you go to therapy, right? I bet he truly doesn't understand all the turmoil you go through, plus he's a guy-and they generally need a little help in understanding emotional affairs. That is JUST a generalization, and realize there are ton of very emotionally attuned guys out there.

You are doing a great job ignoring your mother. Too bad if H can't handle a few phone calls! Does he know even a 1/3 of the horrors your mother put you through?

You advocate for your son. Also, he is an adult, so don't take on all the negative feelings and blame yourself. You can't be everything to him, even though I know it's hard. My mom tried that for a long time, and finally got help and has let go a little. (NOT saying you are like my mom, at all!)

You are doing the best you can right now. You are tough and have survived much worse.

Yay Demunie and Skeksi, my boss acknowledged my email, agreed with me, and stated he'd talk to that colleague.

Well done!

Yay!

Do a victory lap!

thanks velcro. i dont particularly shield my husband from my problems but i dont talk to him about them either. he has a newspaper version of what my upbringing was like and he has to deal with my freak outs a lot . he is usually an amazing even tempered guy .we have been married for 17 years and we have never really argued at all. in fact i freak if he is even slightly annoyed. he sees how the mother treats me now and doesnt talk to her .when she calls here he would never answer the phone .at work he has no choice. i dont even know how she got his work number . im in a panic about my son and have not really talked to him about it at all because i freaked at what he had said about my son .yesterday one of the things my T asked me to do is to talk to my husband about my son i feel so selfish about everything . i just wanted him to be ok with everything. my T also thinks my son might need a little of tough love with certain things and that my husband and i need to be on the same page with each other . this thought terrifies me . i dont want my son to hate me .