Welcome to the couch, old and new! A place to hang out - sometimes you get immediate feedback, sometimes you don't.

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Shouting, "Cool Whip" tends to bring others out from between cushions if you're feeling lonely.

This is a chatty thread. All are welcome. We're kind of psychologically oriented, sometimes. We try to be supportive. At times we discuss what that means.

It’s a place to plop down on the couch when you come home from work or wherever, or wake up in the middle of the night, or check in at lunch, rant a bit or not, and be among friends.

We advise you not to drink or drug and text your therapist ("t") - we speak from experience....

Sometimes the thread moves fast and you might get overlooked; sometimes it moves slowly and all you hear are crickets. Sometimes you get hugged or thanked pages later. So if it's a bigger question, you might want to start a new thread.
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Couch 121

[atisketatasket]

Here's an example of the tight-pants retro baseball uniforms. Poor JR Richard.

[growlycat]

Ouch. Tight baseball pants!!

[stopdog]

Originally Posted by atisketatasket

Here's an example of the tight-pants retro baseball uniforms. Poor JR Richard.

I thought their pants still looked like that

[atisketatasket]

Originally Posted by stopdog

I thought their pants still looked like that

Some players wear them tight, most wear them normal, some wear them baggy. Kind of like some wear their socks high.

I guess it depends on how a man's junk feels most comfortable.

and probably also on what kind of underg's they wear.

[StressedMess]

An ode to waking up at 4:24 am.

It's on mute because it violates terms of service for nasty language.

Grrrr.

[rainbow8]

I haven't slept all night because I took a nap in the afternoon! Has anyone been following Grace VanderWaal on America's Got Talent? She's 12 and she's amazing! I think I have a new obsession.

I'm wide awake at 5:30 am on a Sunday. Been watching old Star Trek episodes for an hour already. Not sure what in the world this is all about.

I think I'm going to wake up h and son and say let's go out to breakfast!

Hey Couchies,

I know not everyone is into "inner child" stuff (do I hear an "ack!" from stopdog? ) and well, for me...in therapy, my T and I have been working hard on my "vulnerable child" mode (schema therapy). I found the entire article interesting - How to Stop Neglecting and Abusing Your Inner Child

What stuck me the most is how I would never intentionally mistreat a flesh-and-blood child like how I hit myself, starve myself, cut myself.

I honestly wouldn't make a warm, attuned or nurturing parental-figure -- I failed some time ago in preventing an aunt from spanking her 3yo grandson for crying (hitting a toddler to get them to stop crying = they're just going to cry harder!)...

You’re probably an abusive parent. Even if you don’t have children.
In each of us lives an inner child. This child isn’t just a sub-layer of our personality; it’s arguably the real us, the deepest aspect of ourselves.
Like many people, I’ve been aware of the inner child idea for some time. I thought of the concept mostly as another way of explaining our personal sensitivities or the childish behavior we all are capable of at times. But it’s not that; it’s much more.
It wasn’t until I thought of my inner child in relation to my actual children that I started to appreciate just how important it is to really take responsibility for this child. I realized, too, just how so many of us mistreat our inner child. Abuse them even. And it’s changed the way I treat myself forever.

[...]

And worst still, I have failed to tell him I love him. I have let him feel unloved, unwanted, and unworthy. Because I was continuing a pattern.
Like so many people, I had experiences early in my life that communicated to my inner child that he was not enough. For some people, this manifests as a deep-seated, almost silent belief, whispered into the ear of our inner child that says, “You are not good enough,” “You are not wanted,” or “You are not important.” Ultimately, it’s a feeling of being unlovable.
In my case, this came about from incidents of witnessing and experiencing abusive behavior at home, with my parents’ divorce when I was a five-year-old at the center of it. I later experienced a more subtle emotional neglect by my parents and had experiences with violence.

I'm really going to try to be kinder to my "vulnerable child" part...I still hate her sometimes, and want to beat her up...but then sometimes I remember I wouldn't cut a misbehaving child as punishment, nor would I beat a difficult child in rage, so why am I doing it to me...?

[rainbow8]

Originally Posted by artemis-within

I'm wide awake at 5:30 am on a Sunday. Been watching old Star Trek episodes for an hour already. Not sure what in the world this is all about.

Sorry. I never got any sleep at all. One of those nights.Breakfast out sounds nice.

I hope you and artemis have a restful night tonight

I did get them out of bed and out to breakfast. I wanted to celebrate my son testing out of the college class. It was nice! I'll try to not nap today, so I can sleep good tonight.

I'm going to an animist church service today with some of my drumming friends, so that will make sure I'm not napping for a couple hours anyway!

[stopdog]

I finally fell asleep about 4:00 and then the middle dog came and woke me for his morning cuddles and breakfast at 7:45. I am looking forward to my nap.

Originally Posted by QuietMind

Hey Couchies,

I know not everyone is into "inner child" stuff (do I hear an "ack!" from stopdog? ) and well, for me...in therapy, my T and I have been working hard on my "vulnerable child" mode (schema therapy). I found the entire article interesting - How to Stop Neglecting and Abusing Your Inner Child

What stuck me the most is how I would never intentionally mistreat a flesh-and-blood child like how I hit myself, starve myself, cut myself.

I honestly wouldn't make a warm, attuned or nurturing parental-figure -- I failed some time ago in preventing an aunt from spanking her 3yo grandson for crying (hitting a toddler to get them to stop crying = they're just going to cry harder!)...


I'm really going to try to be kinder to my "vulnerable child" part...I still hate her sometimes, and want to beat her up...but then sometimes I remember I wouldn't cut a misbehaving child as punishment, nor would I beat a difficult child in rage, so why am I doing it to me...?

Just thought I'd share a little more, I have been learning gradually (through my work with t) to first stop hating, and then to love, my younger "vulnerable child" part. I consciously do things for her that I know she would enjoy like swimming, coloring flowers, etc. Yesterday I realized that I have been doing something for the past couple months subconsciously, I've mentioned before feeding the birds in my backyard, well I've been collecting the dropped feathers for the past couple months and have quite a collection and as I looked at them yesterday, I could feel my younger self's joy in that activity. This morning I was out in the backyard really early, put out the bird seed, and I felt her skipping along on the inside as I picked up a couple more feathers. That made me smile. Because I was not allowed to pick up bird feathers when I was little.

[awkwardlyyours]

(Maybe this is reason #1897 for why I haven't ever been able to make a relationship last but....)

I totally fail to understand couples who choose to sit on the same side of the table. I mean I get separation anxiety but still.

Currently, the combined body odor + talking noise from the couple sitting behind me (with a whole other side totally empty) is interfering with my ability to both enjoy my coffee and read.

And, they're not exactly young either -- 50s at a minimum.

Okay, deep breath + channel (totally absent) compassion etc.

[unaluna]

Awkwardly thank you for making me grateful for my bowl of oatmeal at home!

[atisketatasket]

I get couples who sit on the same side when they're eating with another couple. But when they're by themselves? I'd rather face the person if I like them so much.

I had oatmeal for breakfast too - sugar-free, yum!

[stopdog]

I had a breakfast experiment go awry. But the dogs will happily eat it tonight on their dinner

When I go out to eat with hubby, we sit across from each other. We both like our eating space. When our son comes along, I sit next to hubby and son gets the other side, we figure when you're 6'7" you need the whole side to yourself.

In other news, I just submitted my application a few minutes ago for the Shamanic Practitioner training at the place where I attend drumming circles. It starts next month. I'm excited, I'd wanted to do it last year, but I talked myself out of it because I was afraid of making a fool of myself. I'm interested in conducting circles that focus on working with dreams, and other creative things like writing poetry (since I've written poems during journeys while someone else was drumming, on multiple occasions). I'm nervous, but it feels right at the same time.

[stopdog]

I say good for doing something for yourself that sounds fun and interesting to you.

[stopdog]

Update on breakfast experiment - using it as a broccoli spread on toast work worked better than as a curry broccoli omelette standing alone. Too much broccoli and not enough egg - taste is good. Texture on its own -iffy.