My therapist's clothes

So I have been saying a new therapist (since my ex T terminated me 4 months ago) for two months. We've had 7 sessions so far. She's alright. I actually clicked with her on the first session and decided to keep seeing her based on a gut feeling. There is one thing though that bothers me and it's her clothes. I know I shouldn't care about this but I do. She's 42 but she dresses like a teenager: hoodie, ripped jeans (who wears those past 16?) and Addidas sneakers or Converse (I don't know if that's how you call these shoes in the US so I've added a picture for clarification). I thought it was odd at first but now I find it annoying because I think it's unprofessional. Like would you wear ripped jeans at work? I wouldn't unless I was working at a surfer shop or something. She's a therapist, she really should be wearing more professional clothes. All the therapists I previously saw were wearing business clothes. So maybe I'm just not used to this. What do you guys think? Do you care about your T's clothes? Does it affect you?

I personally wouldn't care at all if my therapist dressed casually, as long as they were a good therapist. Certainly better than some professionals who wear nice suits but are terrible at their jobs.

I would be put off by that too... I don't think therapists should be expected to dress formally or anything, but they should be held to the same standards that most people are in the workplace. I guess the same sort of dress code that, say, a teacher would have? Otherwise it just suggests to me that they don't treat the job (or their clients) with very much respect, I guess.

I don't often notice my T's clothes (though I would if he was wearing a hoodie and ripped jeans!), though the other day he was wearing his shoes - he doesn't usually - and I noticed they were pretty scruffy...

That would bother me too. I mean I don't mind when they dress casual, but that sounds more sloppy than casual. My T showed up looking pretty disheveled once and I hate to admit it but it did kind of put me off, which I felt bad for

Different strokes for different folks.

I think ripped jeans are back in style, unfortunately. I saw some at Macy's recently and did the "$150 for jeans with holes inthe knees!?" thing and felt about a hundred years old, LOL.

My Tis pretty casual, I know him so withon reason it doesn't bug me (not like pajama pants though). Early on I guess I might have felt differently.

Yes I think I see what you mean, it seems as though someone is not taking your session seriously enough as their job, if they don't dress professionally.
On the other hand as Lola says, different strokes for different folks. I saw a documentary where people were doing therapy with horses once. I think those therapists wore jeans and boots. So context is important too and I guess clothes are not everything.

Does she have teenage clients maybe? And is trying to relate?

DBC used to wear these Dr. Seuss type stripey socks on days she saw kids. I liked it when she dressed her age better, too.

I had a free introductory session with someone doing gestalt. He was wearing a baseball cap, Crocs without socks, and what looked like the uniform someone working at a gas station would wear. It was definitely off putting. He was also in his 40's. During the session he turned his baseball cap around like teens wear it. OMG. I didn't engage him for therapy for other reasons but he looked sloppy in his attire and that doesn't really engender trust.

Actually I'm 38 and I wear a hoodie and ripped jeans frequently. I wouldnt care what my T wore as long as they were a great T. That's just me though. Everybody is different. I also have a very casual job-so maybe that's partly why I don't really think much about that stuff.

As long as the therapist was helpful it wouldn't bother me. Although I admit ripped jeans is something I wouldn't wear if I worked in a professional setting. . Old T wore jeans and hoodies. Didn't bother me.

I'm nearly 46 and have ripped jeans and converse .. my T wears jeans most of the time and it doesn't bother me in the slightest what she wears .. she is an amazing T and that is what is important to me

I prefer that my people wear something remarkable, but they don't. I saw my pdoc yesterday and I can't tell you today what he was wearing, only that he was clothed. I'm on a lot of meds.

I try to focus on what is said, but I watch for signs of personality and mood. On occasions when my wife is kind enough to join me during a consultation in order to make better sense of it all, my pdoc is a slightly different person, and that's fun to watch.

Think of voluntary work attire as a disguise, or a signal. You're justifiably upset by what you interpret as a lack of respect for you, but what is she telling you by dressing like a teenager and does she even realize it?

I own only a single set of socially-presentable shirt, shorts and shoes for clients, holidays, attorneys and funerals, so I'm not going to be the first to throw stones from a high horse at any glass houses.

Sorry I didn't mean to offend anybody. I just don't find it very professional, I don't care what she wears in her private life obviously. It's not a deal-breaker, it's just a bit annoying.

I know they're back in style, it's just that I've only seen them on teenagers. So it was odd to see ripped jeans on my 42-year-old therapist.

No offense taken. It's okay. In my area a lot of adults dress like that, but maybe that's this area. Could be different elsewhere with different expectations. I work in someone's home so that's why I don't pay much attention to that stuff.

I don't know about teenage clients. I'm guessing she just wants to be comfortable and is pretty laid back as a person. I realize I shouldn't care about this since she's a good therapist but I do. I'll just have to get used to this.

I see everyone all ages wearing them and I don't get it. It is truly the most ridiculous fashion ever. I'd rather see bell bottoms.

I still agree with you. I don't think that attire is professional or engenders trust. I really wonder if it is somehow calculated (like wear comfortable clothes to put the client at ease) or does the person really not have a clue? Mixed reviews, though, here on this thread.

Hmm... Depends on how out of fashion the therapist is. If she's a total fashion disaster, I will be cringing the entire appt. Too much focus on the fashion disaster and not enough on the therapy.

You know, if she wears ripped mustard yellow jeans with a tattered neon green hoodie with dandruff and lice on the hood because it's never been washed, and those red Adidas sneakers you posted. That would DEF bother me. Not that I'm the most fashionable person on the planet, but I'm 25 and old enough to know that's illegal and warrants an arrest.

That said, I wouldn't mind too much.

My eighty-year-old German T showing up in Dr. Seuss-style stripey socks would rocket me out of depression, no question.

I think striped socks with a professional suit would be the height of cool.

The way this therapist is described her attire seems je jeune and a bit banal. I think it might be expected that a therapist could dress with a bit of flair like statement jewelry or interesting boots.

I would not see a therapist who wore Crocs.

I feel like this thread is going in a bit of a silly direction...

Since this is fairly on-topic here, does anyone else's T not wear shoes?

Nice to see you here Myrto.

Work dress has gotten much more casual in the US. I remember having to wear a suit to work every day! Now, casual is the way to go, but usually not as extreme as you are describing. In my experience, people throughout different areas of Europe always seemed to be more put together in terms of day to day dress. It seems like we dress more sloppily here, so it was surprising to hear this.

I'm kind of older and dress like that too, but not to work. I might feel a bit unsettled if my therapist dressed like that. I'd explore the issue. For me, it would have me questioning the emotional stability of my therapist, maybe her maturity. Not to judge a book by its cover, but appearance does reflect things going on inside, even if just a little.

If i liked the therapist otherwise, I'd accept it but would probably ask her about it. I don't think there's anything wrong with asking her why she dresses like that, and it could be asked in a polite manner. If she's a good therapist, she'd probably take responsibility in knowing that how she dresses might send vibes to clients. Much of communication is non-verbal.

As a side note, I fully support dressing comfortably and in ways that express yourself!