Couch 155: The International Operator

beautiful car, daisy!

In the U.K. we can hardly get any flavours of Oreos. There is only 6 varieties & you have to order them online. You guys have squillions of flavours. Life stinks sometimes!

oh i thought it was you that said it was groucho. oops! it was talking about insight, as in sudden flashes of insight like when we "get" a joke "The joy of a joke may similarly lie in our sudden comprehension of an unexpected ending or a double meaning" and said that groucho was a master at this and gave the elephant one as an example.

that is my new favorite word "squillions". thanks spangle! i shall even use it in a psychologically-related sentence:

"I have squillions of emotions."

Oh pretty!!

Im not sure. I ate cottage cheese and cuties just before, so they tasted creamy-orangey to me.

That makes sense. Velcro was talking about which Indians (east or native american) were shooting elephants, and i kept hearing in my mind, "in my pajamas". So of course i had to share that with you all.

Gorgeous color!

ugh now they have plopped down a math problem (a word problem, which makes it even worse, I hate those!!) into psychology.

"A bat and a ball together cost 110 cents.
The bat costs 100 cents more than the ball.
How much does the ball cost?"

Of course, I got the wrong answer, because I hate math, and was therefore unable to override my intuition with this. I said 10 cents. Wrong!! I asked h, who loves math, and h said correctly "5 cents".

It's still interesting, but they better not stick any more math stuffs in this chapter! ha!

Nice!!!!!!

((Complete))

I say squillions too! Every time I buy into the Early Retirement Fund at work (aka the lottery) I say we're going to be squillionaires.

Not me! (8characters)

i just watched the mini-series: Manhunt: Unabomber...SO GOOD. It is all about the search leading up to and the arrest/trial of Ted Kascinzky.

Sorry! Argo!

Im not surprised he was from a certain dept at a certain university. An they thought I was nutty? But they thought he was fine? Hah!

They tasted like some kind of tropical fruit to me. Too citrusy to be fruit pebbles type. I don't know tropical fruits though... They smelled like pink lemonade.

Ooh, yeah, discussion of the animal kingdom, non-pet variety, happens a lot around Argo.

My psychology chapter this week is on Motivation and Emotion. I don’t usually have a problem with motivation, but maybe the emotion part can larn me something.

I thought i detected the faintest hint of almond. Like what are those teeny tiny oranges? So maybe kumquat marzipan. Which would also be an excellent Scrabble score!

But im with you. I dont know starfruit or dragonfruit or any of those weird fruits. I can barely distinguish mangoes and papayas from each other.

Eta - i ate another after i had a chicken boca burger, and it still tasted orangey to me, so i do recommend chicken boca burgers as a palate cleanser

Ooh Motivation and Emotion is Chapter 10 for me. I just barely started Chapter 9 which is Thinking, Language, and Intelligence. I'm hoping the section on Intelligence will larn me something.

I did not find the mystery oreos, but because they were on sale, I brought home a package of the Cinnamon Bun ones. They are rather tasty, I think.

We're done with shooting elephants, in pajamas or otherwise. Thank god.

PS: Nice car, Daisy.

PPS: One MILLION points to Una for Kumquat Marzipan. (A naughtier version of which will be my stripper name in another life)

I guess it's just animal attraction, eh?

Hope you larn you sumthin' in that there texbook.

Instead of larnin’ about emotions I am contemplating the naughtiest possible version of kumquat marzipan.

I had a chicken Boca burger once. Never again.

I felt really low and awful last night. Composed a draft email to R-asking if I could have my tuesday slot back, but I deleted it each of the three times.

I realize that I'm angry at him and I just feel foolish for allowing myself to get so attached .This won't paint me in a good light- but I want to hurt him because he hurt me. I could do that in a small way, financially by reducing the number of sessions I have. the words power game spring to mind.

I feel like I have three separate versions of me. Two are just young children- but the oldest me is the protector. The one who is over confident, clinical, cold and who is good at putting on a show. But this me more than anything just wants to push him away. When I'm like that I am mean. I say things that are the opposite of how I feel. I try to test him, to try to make him uncomfortable. I only care about myself- he doesn't deserves that. just because he can't give me something that I want, but it's not his fault. Watching this video on youtube about an entrepreneur who started a free school for around 1000 kids made me cry. It's because they had a safe space. Growing up I never really felt safe or felt like I had a home. Yet almost three weeks in at school I feel like I'm running on empty, I'm tired and want to go home. I do like school- but it's the best of times but also the worst. A spring of hope, a winter of despair.

Do we ever really get over trauma and find a way to let go of all this pain?

On a side note- It's been 15 days of listening to positive affirmations. I've found myself automatically saying things like "I love myself". I've found that I'm much less harsher with myself when I've made a mistake. As of yesterday I've started writing out around 6 things I'm grateful for each day and doing small things that make me happy. The old me 10 months ago would never have gone to a bar alone, but I did because I felt like it and I ordered an oreo milkshake xD . Today I want to go to the hipster cafe I like for breakfast even though it's close to 1 in the afternoon.