Couch 155: The International Operator

That's ridiculous. Is there another hotline you can call? They can'
t all be like that.

Oh yeah, i went to a county mental health place for a few years and they had that too. It creeped me out too.

That's a good idea. My aunt benefited from one .

It might be through the police department, but I imagine if you called social services, they could direct you.

This article on gaslighting by therapists is honest and insightful. I think it would be helpful if clients could raise these questions in therapy without risking more gaslighting: #034 - Gaslighting your clients: Just stop! ? Karolina Walsh Psychotherapy

Gah, sick

Anybody got a tried-and-true "makes your fever/aches feel better" remedy?

OMG Capt! You are a really lovely person. You are certainly not disgusting, weird or boring! You have a terrific capacity to support others, even when you are feeling ****. You have a distorted view of yourself (like so many of us do) but we all know differently & we can’t ALL be wrong!

Thanks. Along with my general sensitivity that's the other big concern. The only meds I've done well with (there are a few) are the ones I can administer "as needed."

Wow, thank you. A lot of people here are way more supportive than I am, but I'm trying my best.

I know that you - and other couchies, and T - speak from your heart and don't think that I'm disgusting...or anything. But I feel like I'm fooling everyone. I want to scream: "Why do you love me? Why do you say all these kind words? Look at meeeee! What's wrong with you?! Are you okay? It's me! Can you see me? Open your eyes pleaseeeee. There is nothing to love in me. I'm not nice"... And so on. I think you understand.

Ugh feel better soon

I work with kids a lot and have two: the first is elderberry syrup, I like one from Whole Foods called Honey Gardens. you can get other brands at cvs but with the method I use make sure it has no other cold/flu med additives: i take one spoonful every morning during cold season, 3 spoons throughout the day if I'm feeling I might be getting sick or am around sick people. 4-5 spoons if I actually become sick. I started this two years ago and have only been sick twice total since then (down from 6-7 times per season) and then, only colds with a lowgrade fever that are done in a few days.

The other is harder to find, a tea by Triple Leaf Tea called "Cold and Flu Time." I've tried a lot of cold/flu teas but this one is really amazing- gets rid of sinus pain, sore throat, etc.

Tl;dr I get migraines and feel like crap all the time, but am almost never sick.

ruh_roh- I find it interesting the therapist is referred to once as a caregiver. I've certainly never thought of any of my ts that way.

child- Feel better!

capt- You are a nice person. Hang in there.

Sitting here trying to work on my personal statement for the PhD programs I'm applying to (need to submit it in next week or so). After I read yesterday how competitive the one program is--and I already KNEW one of the other two is highly competitive (less sure about the third)--I just keep thinking there's no chance I could get in. (Despite good grades in undergrad and grad school, pretty good GRE scores, and what I'm hoping are good letters of recommendation.) Which is making it really hard to focus on writing my statement. Or I keep thinking, "Maybe the statement is the one thing that will sway whether I'd get in or not," so then I'm putting more pressure on myself. Like I have to write the exact perfect statement, without knowing what that is (I mean, I know what needs to be in there, it's just the more "personal" part where I'm debating what angle to take). I really hate how my brain works...it's so self-defeating.

Ugh, hope you feel better soon.

When I'm sick, I like to drink those smoothies from Naked or Odwalla that you can get in the grocery store. I'm a fan of Naked's Mango Tango and Odwalla's Mo Beta. But there are other good ones too.

Also, if you have a sore throat Traditional Medicinals Throat Coat tea works pretty well (they have it at most grocery stores).

Zinc supplements, too.

I make my own elderberry syrup. I also make a syrup with honey, cayenne pepper and lemon juice that I find quite useful

So true. We just need them to be "good enough", not perfect!

Good luck on the applications, LT! I'm not sure I would do my PhD program over again if I had the chance to go back in time, but it wasn't the worst thing either. Just be extremely wary of excessive student loan debt.

Ugh, couch, I have had terrible lower back pain all week. I'm 95% sure it's stress-related, but knowing that doesn't seem to make it better. I'm going to try twisting around and screaming, "You have no reason to be hurting!!" at it until the pain goes away.

The personal statement is actually really important, but in my experience of grad admissions it does not have to be perfect. What it does need to do is make you stand out in some way (in a good way). Try to avoid platitudes etc. is my advice.

Thanks! So, in other words, I shouldn't say, "I just want to help people be healthy!" (it's for public health)

I assume it's better to let my passion for what I want to do come through, right? Even if that means sharing stuff like, "I struggled with postpartum depression." And want to help other people with it.

Basically, the overarching idea for the "personal" part of the statement is that I had all kinds of support systems in place for pregnancy/motherhood (I'm specifically applying to maternal/child health programs), supportive H, family close by, good insurance, access to great doctors, etc. Yet I still struggled in many ways (physically, mentally, emotionally). I particularly want to find ways to reach and help women (platitude alert!) who maybe don't have access to those things for various reasons. To connect them with services and support. But then I fear that sounds too "middle-class white privilege-y..."

I interpreted the caregiver bit as referring to the part above about therapy clients often coming from sub-optimal childhood homes since the author used "needed" in the past tense. Like, your clients needed healthy relationships where their perception was respected and validated by their caregivers. They didn't get that then, but you can do it for them now. I really liked the article.

Thanks! Yeah, I'm definitely being mindful of the cost. I'm really hoping I can get funding, like a teaching and/or research assistant position (it's in public health). One's a state school (in the state I live), so it would be less bad (that's how I managed the MS degree--well, and taking one class at a time for most of it, while still working PT). I know one of the places I'm applying to covers 75% of tuition automatically once you hit the stage where you're working on the dissertation (not surprisingly, they're one of the particularly competitive ones). Not sure for the others.

Ugh, sorry to hear that--hope you feel better soon. Sometimes I wish I could yell at my brain in the same way...

That makes sense. I have a good relationship with my parents so I guess that's why I don't feel I need my t to act as a caregiver.

I totally understand. I keep telling my t that he needs to take off his rose coloured spectacles! One day, you will see yourself as we see you. Kind, sensitive, caring with a lovely sense of humour & lots of personality. It’s there, it’s just you can’t see it yet!

Hi Everyone, hugs to anyone that's hurting, not feeling well and who wants them. I'm in a good mood today!

So I live in Boston and we have a serious "Turkey" problem! These turkeys are everywhere and causing problems for people because they are being aggressive.

Here is an article from a community close by that has a big turkey problem and it's the same thing in my community!

https://patch.com/massachusetts/some...incidents-rise

Here is a picture of 2 turkeys crossing a very busy street right in front of me!

I had to run through an entire literal flock of turkeys on my run this morning in Brookline.

But it amuses me to see all those fancy houses with big dust bath holes scratched into otherwise-perfect lawns.

I know, seriously!! I just posted the pic....do you recognize where it's from? (Down near St. Mary's T stop)

Hope you're feeling better!

I was just going to say, that's the St. Mary's St turkey family! I know them well.

Today I am feeling much better. Thanks

Eta- the turkeys of my morning encounter were the rather more threatening Winchester St flock, which seems to have about 8-9 members