Couch 162: Let's Play Ball! (The Baseball Couch)

wow chichirochild, i would say that deserves at least a nap!!

If your yoga teacher understands the concept of consent, then I think it will be less awkward than you are anticipating.

'It was fine because I asked for the help and expected the touching'

In this recent experience, you asked for help, and she responded by physically correcting, which you didn't expect.

I'm not sure I'm explaining myself well, but I think she would understand.

I'm trying to get some thoughts together before I start my paper about the documentary. 5 major ideas that I learned from it, hmm. Let's see. That researchers have found that circumstances are only 10% of our happiness. Several of the case studies seem to show that. So that won't be hard. I'm surprised it's so low. It would be interesting to know where they got their sample from. I would imagine depending on what those circumstances are, that percentage would change. The 2nd idea I got out of it was how a sense of community, being part of something bigger, contributes to happiness. There's a case study of people in Denmark living in community housing. Almost sorta like a commune kind of thing in a way. Need to pick 3 more before I start writing.

This is pretty clear. Not at all confusing.

IF you are comfortable approaching her, it might also be helpful for her future yoga students if she understands the difference.

Hardly confusing -- you asked and that's the only thing that matters.

I would talk to her -- if she doesn't get it, I'd seriously look for another yoga class. Not in an 'Oh gawd, she's awful' kinda way but more that it's not worth it for you to keep getting triggered and feeling unsafe in a place that's actually supposed to calm you down and make you feel stable. And, the kicker is you're paying for it? No.

Also, especially with things like yoga and stuff around the body, the norm increasingly is for teachers to be trained in being sensitive about stuff like touch.

So, there's really just no excuse for her to not be aware.

On another note: the depression gutted me on Friday. I still feel quite bad. I've been thinking about whether or not I ought to go to the hospital.

But I think part of me wants to go to the hospital because I think it'll make the shrinx (t + pdoc) worry about me. Especially since I was feeling better for a while and it would surprise them. I like the idea of sending pdoc a message saying "I'm not well so I'm going to the hospital. Not sure when I'll be d/c'd; can you let t know I'll miss my appointments next week?" There's something about the combination of competent/organized and hospital-level sick that gladdens my lil attention-seeking-but-doesn't-want-to be-seen-that-way heart.

I think I also have this belief that if the shrinx know how sick I am they'll finally make me better. I fantasize* about them coming to visit me in the hospital and being sweet to me--giving me a hug or sitting with me while I cry or something. And inside my head at least, them doing this would finally fix me, finally fill up the bottomless pit of yearning and sadness inside me. I know this isn't true. But I wish it were. (And when I'm not totally clear with myself about that belief and its falseness and how it works in my head, it messes with my unconscious and plays out in my decision-making... so thanx y'all for making a place where I can think this through.)

*I really hate the word "fantasize" because in my mind at least it's tarred by its sexual connotation... but I've just decided to use it and own it 'cause it's the best word I know to describe what happens in my head when I imagine scenarios in my mind. Sigh.

I'd bet tons of money that you aren't the only one with those kind of triggers. Who knows how many yoga students she has lost because of that behavior, but they never were able/willing to tell her. I think you would be doing her a favor to alert her to it. You certainly don't need to go into any details, but saying something like "Because of some things that have happened in the past, it freaks me out a little when someone touches me without warning. It would help me out if you could not do that." Frankly she shouldn't do it to anyone. But I guess you can't control that.

Hi Jess! Welcome to the couch!

Have you told them you don't like to be touched?

*Takes a seat on the couch*

Hi couchies. I'm brand new. I'm Jess, and I struggle with BPD, OCD, PMDD, traits of dependence disorder, and in remission from atypical anorexia. Lately the first 3 have been kicking my ***. Especially the BPD. I made a suicide attempt a week ago, and I feel like everyone has now forgotten and it's old news and people expect me to have moved on already. However, sometimes I still feel the same way I did when I made the attempt. Just hopeless. Devastated. DESPERATE. I hate this, couchers.

to the college professor couchies, a question: when you put in the assignment to "Write a 400 word paper" but don't say "minimum", is that what you mean? a minimum of 400 words? or not much over 400 words? I found that documentary pretty powerful and i'm already at 300 words and i've only written about one of the 5 major ideas I learned from it. mine is gonna end up well over 400 words if i don't start cutting stuff out now. lol

I would guess it means not much over 400 words but I could be wrong.

(((@@))) - i ditto what everyone else said!

(((Chiro))) - are you seeing too much of the family? My aunt called me today, and i just let it go to voicemail. Im still recuperating from her last phone call

On my course it's a 10% +/- so on a 400 word paper that would be 360-440 words. It sounds like a really small word count. I'm ridiculously verbose so I would struggle!

apparently I am ridiculously verbose as well! i think what i shall do is just write it first, and then see what i can cut out instead of trying to cut while i write. it's just dang it, it was really inspiring and it's hard not to say a lot about it!

i'm at 411 words right now and i still have 3 points to cover....

I value concise writing. I usually give a range of min and max. If I only gave one number I would mean not much less or more than that. 400 words would make it seem to me that this is a short exercise and meant to contain you or teach to to be concise.

One of my favorite writing quotes is: "If I'd had more time, I would have written less."

It's actually, would have written a shorter letter, but I like written less. I think it's often attributed to Mark Twain, but I don't think that's definitive.

Thanks. I'm going to do both - first write it the way I want just for myself because I am enjoying it so much, but then cut it down to closer to 400 words before I turn it in.

I know I'm being paranoid haha

Though not a college professor, pulling from my own college experience and when I assign things, the word count provided is typically a minimum. You obviously don't want to write a 6 page essay if the word count is 400 words, but if it were 1,200 - 1,500 I don't think many professors would be turned off by that.

I just finished my post in my class for the weekend, which was kind of weird. The professor asked us to work through the module by today, and I was the first person to post...

ETA: and there wasn't a minimum word count, just four questions that we have to answer about two video clips. So I only wrote a paltry 212 words. But I answered the questions

I like that one! Another one of my favorite writing quotes is from Bazooka Joe:

"Why are you writing that letter so slowly?"

"Its for my girlfriend, she doesnt read very fast."

It means around 400 words. About two pages, using the 250-words-per page rule. We have a lot to grade and don’t want six-page papers when we asked for two.

Although undergraduates normally have the opposite problem, there is value in learning how to be succinct.

Succinctness depends on your profession as you go forward I guess. When I write my IEPs they tend to be lengthy, because it's hard at times to synthesize the data points that I have about a student. For instance, the one I just finished working on is 26 pages, though I have written a 35 pager this year.

Yet though they're long, my administrators have often praised my IEPs because they're complete and give very accurate pictures of the students they're written about.

[QUOTE=daisydid;6013373]Though not a college professor, pulling from my own college experience and when I assign things, the word count provided is typically a minimum. You obviously don't want to write a 6 page essay if the word count is 400 words, but if it were 1,200 - 1,500 I don't think many professors would be turned off by that.

I just finished my post in my class for the weekend, which was kind of weird. The professor asked us to work through the module by today, and I was the first person to post...

ETA: and there wasn't a minimum word count, just four questions that we have to answer about two video clips. So I only wrote a paltry 212 words. But I answered the questions [/QUOTE.
It is a giant pain to grade and if one was planning on around 400 words but got 1500-that greatly changes the grading time. I don’t read past the max.so they dont get credit for anything over my max word count.

Being concise is not antithetical to being thorough.

I think the context is different, though. IEPs ought to be thorough, and they’re a work document.


Reaction papers to an article, book, movie, not so much.


I’d also imagine you’re not saying the same thing over and over in slightly different words, as undergraduates tend to do. And if asked to boil everything down to a one-page abstract, you could do that.

Well I compromised. I took out a chunk from the beginning, and tightened up a few things here and there, and ended up with 676 words not including my title and references. I am going to just take a chance and submit it like this. There's an extra credit paper after all - so if she comes back and says "Too many words!" and scores me down for it, I will do the extra credit one. At exactly 400 words.

Or no. Better yet, I will leave it for now, and come back to it tomorrow, and see if I can shorten it any more and then turn it in Monday when it's due.

(Yes, I can see that I am succumbing to my "good little girl complex" wanting to do it exactly right. Thanks, t.)

eta: at least it's double-spaced, and Arial font 11 pt as requested.