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#476
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Witnesses would help but if you had any kind of proof- letters, texts, DNA, etc. I could identify the Pdoc’s genitalia, for instance. The Pdoc in my case made the medical licensing board case easier. He was arrested for doing something similar with another female patient. His arrest made the papers and seven women in all came forward with allegations of exploitation. Three of us cooperated with the medical licensing board and his medical license was revoked on several counts for each of us. |
![]() koru_kiwi
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![]() koru_kiwi
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#477
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![]() koru_kiwi, missbella, Mopey, Out There, thesnowqueen
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#478
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#479
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I need to share this, My T hurt me very much and afterward I have found out she was very unethical, she led me to believed she cared, evn on the day she terminated with out any process put in place, she said she cared and wish the best for me, she has lied and will continue to lie.
Termination Day As a child we long for love and affection and to be hugged and be held, but not every child can be so lucky. As a child they have no choice, voice or mobility, they learn to trust in what they know or are taught, they take the hand that is given to us, Then as adults go and seek the help, only to find out have attachment and abandonment issues that stem from our childhood leaving them with the effects of attachment to their therapist that can developed a strong yearning for some type of closeness that became heartbreaking when therapy comes to an end by termination. Anytime that therapy is abruptly terminated with one’s therapy it has a devastating impact. First let’s talk about a little history about attachments in order to understand the impact that one might encounter, theory was originally developed to explain the nature of a child’s bond to his or her caretaker. I must acknowledge John Bowlby development of the attachment theory (McLeod) his study shows that relations between client attachment to ones therapist and therapist perceptions of transference, as well as between client attachment and recollections of parental caregiving. 51 client-therapist pairs in ongoing therapy. After session, clients completed a measure of their attachment to their therapists and a measure of their perceptions of parental caregiving during childhood. Therapists rated levels of positive and negative, and amount of, client transference. Both secure and preoccupied-merger attachments were positively related to both negative transference and amount of transference. Level of avoidant-fearful attachment was not correlated with any type of transference. Insecure attachment to the therapist was associated with more negative recollections of parental caregiving (Bretherton). Secondly when therapy is terminated abruptly, Clients often experience abandonment and even devastation, much like when a loved one has abandoning a child. It becomes a very negative consequence, feeling of discouraging, hopeless and loss, are just some of the feeling that a patient will encounter. Countertransference issues stages of grief, clearly delineates the five stages a person passes through when dying, the five stages are denial, anger, bargaining, depression and then acceptance (Stage Of). “These stages are mirrored by the abrupt termination initiated by your therapist. Over time, loss can be accepted if one moves sufficiently through the stages of grief. Kübler-Ross clearly delineates the five stages a person passes through when dying, which are mirrored by those suffering the grief of loss. Kübler-Ross believed that a Person typically goes through denial and isolation, anger, bargaining, depression and finally, Acceptance. Similarly, in the termination of therapy, the client and the therapist may pass through each of these stages to differing degrees, whether affectively, cognitively or behaviorally (Cruz)”. Lastly when terminated abruptly and suddenly that has been mishandled from a person that deeply share very intimate feeling with it turns into a crushing blow, clients will often feel abandonment and devastated and rejected, feeling much like the child who wanted to be loved, hugged and held. “Novick declared: Once we have acknowledged that termination was mishandled from the very start of analytic practice, we can gain some respect for the power of the forces that have had to be defended against. Many of our analytic forebears were superb clinicians, and their failure to recognize the possible pathological impact of the way they miss-handled termination should give us pause. Termination elicits the most powerful anxieties and conflicts we have come to know (McCown)”. As a child we long for love and affection and to be hugged and be held, but not every child can be so lucky, children have no choice, voice or mobility, they learn to trust in what they know or are taught, they take the hand that is given to us, within each of us, we have that inner child, wanting, deserving, and craving to be loved, hugged and held, this all part of the process in therapy we work on called parts work, while in a place we call home, a place we can trust, a place that is safe, a place that we open up and disclose the hurt, the pain and the misery, a place where no harm will be done, until one single day, you are called to the therapist office, a day that one will never forget and their heart will be forever scared, as adults we didn’t ask for this type of hand to be given to us, but has, its Termination day! |
![]() koru_kiwi, Mopey
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#480
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It's an exploitive paradigm. Also, the flipside is the client who is stuck in therapy for years or decades, because cutting ties with the therapist is too destabilizing. |
![]() here today, koru_kiwi, Mopey
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#481
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Bud, I hate to say it, but I believe you are telling it like it is. Depressing, isn’t it?
At the same time, I think there are some reputable therapists out there who are able to do the job of listening, helping, and healing. I say that only because I finally found one. |
![]() koru_kiwi
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#482
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__________________
"stand for those who are forgotten - sacrifice for those who forget" "roller coasters not only go up and down - they also go in circles" "the point of therapy - is to get out of therapy" "don't put all your eggs - in one basket" "promote pleasure - prevent pain" "with change - comes loss" |
#483
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I was lucky to fine a great subsequent therapist but after I moved it took me fifteen years to try to find a good therapist again.
My second search took about a year to find Current T. I went through two other therapists before I found Current T. |
![]() Mopey
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#484
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Let's see, H - let me do some number-crunching. I'd say in the 50 years I've been in therapy, on and off, I've encountered (among others) two REALLY AWFUL ones, a couple of not-too-bad ones, and finally, when I was about 45, met the therapist I would stay with for many years and finally finish up with. So let's say it took me 20+ years. My best to you. Be well. ![]() |
#485
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I came across therapists who seemed like decent people. But it was still going to be pointless at best. The only sure thing was that the therapist would make money. |
![]() here today
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![]() missbella
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#486
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Yes, of course that is true Bud. But in the end, I got what I came for and what I paid for..
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#487
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I just wanted everyone to know that I am advocating and investigating as much as I am able!
I am in the process of building my confidential informants in the healthcare system. To any survivor of abuse in therapy, know that you are not alone and that your life is worth so much. Don't let the failure of a mental health professional ruin you. Their industry will be getting a kick in the butt soon enough. Thanks, HD7970ghz
__________________
"stand for those who are forgotten - sacrifice for those who forget" "roller coasters not only go up and down - they also go in circles" "the point of therapy - is to get out of therapy" "don't put all your eggs - in one basket" "promote pleasure - prevent pain" "with change - comes loss" |
![]() here today, koru_kiwi, Mopey, Out There, precaryous
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![]() Mopey, Out There, precaryous
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#488
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Good for you HD. I'm still trying to process what happened with me 6 months after the event , and my ethical T is still angry about what happened and wishes he could act.'Hugs to all who've been on the end of this trauma , I often wish there was more that could be done , but I think they just look the other way and cover for each other a lot of the time.
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"Trauma happens - so does healing " |
![]() HD7970GHZ, here today, koru_kiwi, Mopey
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#489
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And I was in therapy off and on for 50 years, too, and did not get what I went and paid for.
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![]() HD7970GHZ, koru_kiwi
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#490
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Yes, seems that way to me, too. The action probably has to come from us but when we've been beat down and gaslighted so badly it is, of course, hard to do anything.
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![]() HD7970GHZ, koru_kiwi, Out There
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#491
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I wish that healing comes for you, in whatever form. Can be unpredictable. ![]() |
![]() HD7970GHZ
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![]() HD7970GHZ, Out There
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#492
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"Healing", which to me is a term used by the hucksters to promote their scam, will come for me when the damage and potential for damage to people by psychotherapy is recognized and exposed. I am too old, I don't expect anyone to acknowledge the damage done to me by therapy. But to know that someone has been successful in bringing the situation to light -- yes that would help a lot. My life is almost over -- stymied and stunted and damaged by those folks. If you don't get that, you don't get it. |
![]() HD7970GHZ, koru_kiwi, Out There, precaryous
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![]() HD7970GHZ
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#493
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Love and support to everyone who has been through trauma and abuse in therapy! For the failures of the industry to provide the safety that is promised and for taking advantage of an inherent power imbalance for personal gain. For being victim blamed and shamed, being invalidated by subsequent therapists and for the unending systemic abuses that continue to occur.
I cannot wait until this issue is exposed to the extent that it needs. Hope for justice and accountability and protection for the most vulnerable populations who make themselves vulnerable in pursuit of help - only to be harmed. Don't give up fellow survivors. We are the achilles heel of healthcare. Our voices are paramount to change. Only a matter of time. The truth will out. ![]() Thanks, HD7970ghz
__________________
"stand for those who are forgotten - sacrifice for those who forget" "roller coasters not only go up and down - they also go in circles" "the point of therapy - is to get out of therapy" "don't put all your eggs - in one basket" "promote pleasure - prevent pain" "with change - comes loss" |
![]() Out There, precaryous
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#494
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There was a surge of academic articles and books by MH professionals in the ‘90’s that zeroed in on therapist exploitation/ethics/ the harm/ how to treat and help survivors... Helpful publications. AND there were articles blaming the patient and advising the MH professional how to beware. There was a book that actually advocated therapist/patient sexual intimacies. Can’t remember the title, maybe ‘the love treatment’. ![]() Here it is, “The Love Treatment: Sexual Intimacy Between Patients and Psychotherapists” by Martin Shepherd https://www.amazon.com/Love-Treatmen.../dp/0446668265 Why aren’t MH professionals writing about the prevalence, harm and treatment modalities for survivors anymore? Around the same time period I found several MH professionals who specialized treating therapist exploitation survivors in California, Minnesota and Texas (May be others I didn’t run across). Why has this stopped? Perhaps about a year ago I wrote into Dr. Phil (I know, I know) and I received an email from an interested producer within the week! I wanted to say this is STILL an issue... but family issues arose that needed my attention and my T expressed concern that I might not be ‘protected’ enough...not knowing what direction the topic would go. Plus, I don’t feel stable atm, so I didn’t pursue it. But maybe the issues need a platform that large! We pay for therapy and not only do not get what we pay for but we are given additional issues to deal with, as well! ‘Do no harm’ would be a laugh if it wasn’t so painful. Last edited by precaryous; Jul 26, 2019 at 12:55 PM. |
![]() HD7970GHZ, Out There
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![]() HD7970GHZ, koru_kiwi
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#495
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I think it's a case of all systems are corrupted and broken and need house cleaning. It's sort of " Uh , yeah , we know there are problems , but what can we do ? " ( spreads hands theatrically )
With all of them , when it gets to the point that nobody trusts them anymore they'll HAVE to do something , but Hey , why let it get that bad ?
__________________
"Trauma happens - so does healing " |
![]() HD7970GHZ, koru_kiwi, precaryous
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#496
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how many endless stories have we heard about clients having to seek out another therapist, a better therapist, a 'good one' just to get past the issues that the previous T inflicted? this was one reason why when i realised the therapy with my ex-T wasn't helping, but was harmful and making my issues worse, that i was going to rely on myself (with my spouses support) to get me out of there. in my mind, seeking further talk therapy from another T wasn't even going to be an option to get past the disappointments and hurts inflicted from the unhealthy dynamics of my relationship with my ex-T. |
![]() HD7970GHZ
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![]() HD7970GHZ, Out There
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#497
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In my previous post I was asking, in part, ...where are the articles..where are the therapists who specialize in ‘therapist exploitation’ these days ? —> when I realized just now- We shouldn’t NEED them! ![]() I had thoughts similar to yours that once we have been exploited by a therapist, who can we work THAT out with?? We should trust another T?! As I’ve mentioned before, I was very careful and nervous when I looked for a subsequent therapist while I was still enmeshed with the abusive Pdoc. It took me fifteen years to consider trying to find a new T in my state after my move from West coast. koru kiwi, I’m glad to hear you have your spouse’s support ( and PC) and do not have to deal with the hurts and disappointments by yourself. |
![]() HD7970GHZ, koru_kiwi
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![]() HD7970GHZ, here today, koru_kiwi, Out There
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#498
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Sadly we do hear those endless stories , when I look at my own story it's so ridiculous it couldn't be made up. If I didn't laugh I'd cry. I do remember there seemed to be more T's specializing in treating therapy issues going back a few years than there seem to be presently
__________________
"Trauma happens - so does healing " |
![]() HD7970GHZ
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![]() HD7970GHZ, koru_kiwi, precaryous
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#499
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Rather than trying to reform a hopelessly dysfunctional and unethical profession/practice, better to stop using it and put it out of business.
Same goes for mainstream medicine. I think one of the pillars of good health is avoidance of conventional healthcare. Each interaction with therapists and doctors carries lot of risk, and potential benefits are scarce and meagre. |
![]() HD7970GHZ
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![]() HD7970GHZ, msrobot, Out There
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#500
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Absolutely agree with the conversation(s) here!
It baffles me how biased and unruly healthcare professionals are. The abusers are just as guilty as the professionals who know about these things and choose to do nothing; and professionals who are biased and unwilling to accept the truth are no better. Add to this the Government who knows very well about these abuses and chooses to write relaxed policy and legislation to allow for allow cover-ups to maintain a public facade of do no harm. Add to this all the third party organizations who have conflicts of interest, who continue to save face and protect the perpetrators for fear of repercussions. CLASSIC, CLASSIC, CLASSIC! The healthcare system has become a perfect environment for abuse; self-perpetuating cultural and systemic abuse. Their denial, projection and cover-ups have (overtime) normalized abuse on a grand scale and nothing will change until they are exposed and forced to acknowledge the problems that exist; the problems that THEY have created. This large-scale and cultural change starts with the individual, however, professionals are scared to speak up because they know what happens to fellow colleagues and or clients when they speak up. (There is a culture of fear and intimidation that is SO well documented in large institutions like healthcare). Because clients have little to no credibility on their own (unless they conglomerate and stand together), the only way to make a change is to wait for professionals to speak up (which very few do), or for clients to file class-action lawsuits, spearhead social movements and prove to the Government that full public judicial inquiries are necessary in order to expose mass corruption and abuses in their systems. In order to do this, we would have to prove to the Government that it is in their best interest to do so; otherwise they will continue to protect themselves and their institutions. CLASSIC, CLASSIC, CLASSIC. This is a cycle of abuse by those in power who have ZERO accountability and even though it is the SAME - EXACT - STORY - EVERY - TIME, (Catholic Church Scandals, Canadian Residential Schools, etc) nothing ever changes overnight! When will Government take responsibility for their broken systems and protect citizens who depend on them!? It is absolutely mind boggling. Dear Government, your systemic abuse and culture of fear and intimidation may very well protect and maintain a functioning system free from accountability; but overtime it always ends up far worse than it should ever be and the truth will out! Why not spare a whole lot of embarrassment, not to mention insurmountable levels of abuse and trauma and deaths by taking action now and forcing staff to be held accountable!? I gotta take a moment to reflect on this BIG PICTURE mentality. The longer I spend thinking and researching this stuff, the more I lose faith in humanity. There are SO many healthcare professionals who want to speak up about this. If we survivors can band up with them - we can combine our voices and together we might just be able to change things. Thanks, HD7970ghz
__________________
"stand for those who are forgotten - sacrifice for those who forget" "roller coasters not only go up and down - they also go in circles" "the point of therapy - is to get out of therapy" "don't put all your eggs - in one basket" "promote pleasure - prevent pain" "with change - comes loss" |
![]() here today, Out There, precaryous
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