[coolibrarian]

Originally Posted by DP_2017

I wish I could text or email or anything. This is so hard on me... another week of nothing ahead. i miss him terribly. I'm doing ok but now knowing how much longer there STILL is, I'm feeling very overwhelmed. A simple text would change everything but I'm not allowed that. We didn't even get much time to discuss this all. I can't handle random... long trips again with no contact. i just can't. Sigh....

Eternity this week will be for sure.

DP, whenever my T is away, I write her a letter. It comes to feel like I am having a conversation with her, every day, when I reach out to her this way. When she comes back, sometimes I read it to her, other times, not. Might you try this?

[pepper_mint]

A funny thing happened to me...
For the first 2 weeks (half of the break) I was in a really bad shape (emotionally & physically). I didn't know what to do, I had weak muscles, I was tired, depressed, very anxious, I was crying all the time, no appetite etc.
And then... one night I had a dream with T. It was a session but not face to face (only by phone). And you know what? When I woke up, I felt finally good! I was relaxed, with no anxiety, no tiredness, no bad mood. Amazing!
I still have 2 weeks of waiting and I hope that it won't be worse again (or maybe at least I'll have a dream with T from time to time.. ).

[DP_2017]

Originally Posted by coolibrarian

DP, whenever my T is away, I write her a letter. It comes to feel like I am having a conversation with her, every day, when I reach out to her this way. When she comes back, sometimes I read it to her, other times, not. Might you try this?

I have been. It's somewhat helpful but I still feel sad. One week until I speak to him again

[ruh roh]

This would have been my session day. I'm not missing it, or my therapist, now that I have moved on to thinking I'm just fine and she's the mentally unstable one.

[precaryous]

T is back tomorrow. I will see her Friday.
She was gone two weeks! But I managed really well. Didn’t need to email PrevT much at all.
I did great!

[BonnieJean]

T's on vacay for the next 10 days. I always ask for a note and she writes a few encouraging lines on a note card. So i have that. Will look for positive ways to be. The weird thing this time is I'm dreading a r l event the day after she's back. So I want the time to pass for her return but not to be getting closer to that event....

[1MastersStudent]

I just started seeing a therapist on Wednesday and he will be gone next week. I will be gone the following week so I won't see him until the end of August.

[LostOnTheTrail]

Four weeks today since I last heard from her - approximately another two to go, if my hunch about the summer break is right. If not, who knows?

[DP_2017]

Tuesday is nearly here! I've doing ok.... had a few REALLY tough days.... but I think I've gone into mental avoidance mode like when my pet died... so I'm doing anything to not even allow myself to think of it long. Really hoping nothing has changed come Tues though. I would lose so much trust in him if he changes boundaries drastically.

Just gotta get through this long stress filled weekend.

[PurpleBlur]

Originally Posted by justbreathe1994

It’s that time of year again, when therapists go on vacation and those of us with intense attachment struggle and try to distract ourselves from missing them too much (okay it may just be me...). I already posted about mine going on vacation, but I thought I’d make a more general discussion thread for anyone who needs support! What do you struggle most with while your T is away? What are some helpful ways you cope with it? Is posting and checking in on PC helpful?

my therapist went out of the country for 21 days and i nearly had a heart attack. did not get hospitalized though like i used to, so i guess thats a good thing... shes back home now and I see her soon but im afraid to see her agan after such a long time, like something may have changed...

[Merope]

10 more days to go...

[DP_2017]

2 days left. This is so draining now... the no contact part is really weighing me down. I am concerned things will be different/awkward on Tuesday but I hope not.

[Lrad123]

My therapist is going on vacation in September and part of me would like to ask where he’s going because I’m curious and I’d ask that question of anyone else in my life who told me they were going on vacation. Last time he went somewhere in February I asked upon his return if he would tell me where he went, and he willingly told me. Since then, we’ve had an instance where he didn’t answer a simple question about whether or not he had a pet, and now I’m not sure what I can ask him. Well, I guess I know I can ask him anything, but I feel gunshy about asking because I don’t want him to not tell me and I don’t want to feel rejected or like he’s distancing himself. I feel like he might not answer just to push my buttons and I’m confused and bothered by this.

[LonesomeTonight]

Originally Posted by Lrad123

My therapist is going on vacation in September and part of me would like to ask where he’s going because I’m curious and I’d ask that question of anyone else in my life who told me they were going on vacation. Last time he went somewhere in February I asked upon his return if he would tell me where he went, and he willingly told me. Since then, we’ve had an instance where he didn’t answer a simple question about whether or not he had a pet, and now I’m not sure what I can ask him. Well, I guess I know I can ask him anything, but I feel gunshy about asking because I don’t want him to not tell me and I don’t want to feel rejected or like he’s distancing himself. I feel like he might not answer just to push my buttons and I’m confused and bothered by this.

Mine has told me after the fact where he went one time, but he wouldn't tell me beforehand, not even if it was, say, for work (like a conference) or fun, or like, within the country vs. out of the country. He'll be away a few days later this month, but I know it's likely pointless to ask, even though I've explained why it would make me feel better to know. Could you maybe just talk to him about wanting to ask him without actually asking him?

[DP_2017]

Originally Posted by Lrad123

My therapist is going on vacation in September and part of me would like to ask where he’s going because I’m curious and I’d ask that question of anyone else in my life who told me they were going on vacation. Last time he went somewhere in February I asked upon his return if he would tell me where he went, and he willingly told me. Since then, we’ve had an instance where he didn’t answer a simple question about whether or not he had a pet, and now I’m not sure what I can ask him. Well, I guess I know I can ask him anything, but I feel gunshy about asking because I don’t want him to not tell me and I don’t want to feel rejected or like he’s distancing himself. I feel like he might not answer just to push my buttons and I’m confused and bothered by this.

I get this, and I'm lucky enough to have a T that shares this openly, but I also have a T who acts more "friend" like than most.... I'm not sure if typically T's share this info prior with clients. I assume not.

I can understand, especially with the weirdness around the pet thing about being unsure but you can ask... if you really wanna know. Some people don't like knowing. I have a friend in therapy who never wants to know because then it fuels their jealousy issues. Good luck should you choose to ask.

[Elio]

I went on vacation and did video visits on all of my usual session days except one (because I was traveling). On the first weekend, I asked her to email me as it was a special day for me. She said she would if she had connection, she didn't know if she would. She was able to email me. On the last video visit, she was not in her office (after the 2nd weekend). Between the 2 of them, I started feeling/thinking like she couldn't take vacation unless I was gone. This thought process leaves me feeling like there is something seriously wrong with me both because of the thought that I'm that "needy" and because I know it's irrational. I know me being on vacation has nothing to do with her getting away as well. So, it's not like she "took advantage" of my vacation time. Heck, I still met with her, so how could she have taken advantage of it. Still .. ugh.

[DP_2017]

The last day! Tomorrow I finally get to see him again! This has been so difficult. A real test for me.

[Cantfindthewords]

Should have seen her today. Miss her like crazy. 13 more days.

[Lrad123]

Originally Posted by DP_2017

The last day! Tomorrow I finally get to see him again! This has been so difficult. A real test for me.

How did it go? Maybe you posted on a different thread? Just curious. Please share only if you want to though.

[lucozader]

Last session with my T tonight for eighteen days. We rescheduled my next session so that it's slightly less time. He was really lovely... kept talking about how he holds me in mind when I'm not there...

He told me where he is going and I said that should help me to feel like he exists, if I can place him in the world.

I don't want him to go. I don't want him to leave me. I should have tied myself to the chair or something.

Argh

[DP_2017]

Originally Posted by Lrad123

How did it go? Maybe you posted on a different thread? Just curious. Please share only if you want to though.

I stayed off forum yesterday. It went fine. Felt weird for a few moments but it went back to normal fairly quickly. Thankfully

[Cantfindthewords]

I’m really struggling today. She said I could email her but she’s on holiday, I don’t want to burden her. Day 10 of 20.

[Lemoncake]

Originally Posted by Cantfindthewords

I’m really struggling today. She said I could email her but she’s on holiday, I don’t want to burden her. Day 10 of 20.

If your T said contact was okay- I would email.

[Cantfindthewords]

Originally Posted by Lemoncake

If your T said contact was okay- I would email.

If only it was that easy.
I just feel like I should quit, I can’t deal with this anymore.

[lucozader]

I suppose this is "day one". I miss him already.

I said some things that I regret last night and I wish I could see him soon to explain them better.

I'm just kinda sad about everything I guess.