Couch 175: You've Got Mail....

Yes, you could. Choosing not to do so is quite different from being unable to do so.(stern professor voice).

I am gearing up for students.

Fair point!

Classes start way too soon. I am not ready. I am going to clean so I don’t think about it.

Plus side I think I got all the major things on my summer to-do list done.

I just realized that, what T told me yesterday, what he meant was that, if things went poorly, I might not get to see him again. I think that's the implication, but it didn't get through to my brain yesterday.

I should have told him I love him. He knows I do, but I should have said it in person.

For myself, sometimes I click the 'hug' button if a post has particularly affected me for some reason, in a 'that person saying y reminds me of how I feel about x' kind way. Not so much because it was an emotional statement that was made.

then again I'm an emotional woman - so - just about anything could be an 'emotional statement' to me. Yes, even things you post sometimes!

Just got invited by my mom to spend a week with them in their new US home in two weeks... one weeks after I hand in my thesis, the first time in years that I'll have any time to relax. In addition, I hate flying, hate spending time with my parents and am really not a huge fan of the political climate in the US (not to mention that I still feel on the edge of some kind of psychosis and really don't think I could skip therapy). No is apparently not a good answer because 'I used to like it, would survive the flight and it's a present for your graduation'. I said I'd think about it again, but now I have no idea how to explain that I just really, really don't want to go... I wished she could just accept no as an answer and not try to convince me to do stuff I don't want to do.

Shouldn’t a present be something you wanted?

I love The Little Shop Around the Corner.

I think there should be a reality show in which therapists compete to get a client. On the model of The Bachelor. Instead of handing out roses, the client will give out...clocks maybe?

Tissues. Or, just not RED roses. ***** willow branches maybe.

Eta - uh - weeping willow branches?!

Yay! You talk my language!

Mischief managed! So that's 2 couchies already on board.

Things might improve. Could you arrange to visit him instead of a full session?

Since my H and I are not celebrating our anniversary-I’ve decided that I’m going treat myself to a good dinner.
He did say Happy Anniversary to me finally around noon but honestly I just ignored him because it’s too little too late. And he’s making chicken for himself on the grill tonight. So I’ll be eating separate from him and alone on our 12th anniversary. I honestly have no interest in spelling out for him that he needed to do something to celebrate today. That should have been a given especially since we had plans every other year.

I haven't seen any episodes, but that would be exciting! Makes me think of the show Blind date my mum would watch with Cecila something I think- the girl/guy picking couldn't see the contestants as there was a screen in the middle but they'd get asked questions.

Cilla Black originally presented Blind Date, but she passed away a few years ago. Now it's presented by Paul O'Grady.

Oh I'm going through your anniversary separately. If you had taken care of everything previously I think he just expected you to have done it this year too without really putting any effort into it.

Oh it's still running! I haven't watched old style evening TV in donkey years.

Which movie did you get up choosing?

I’m taking out my aggressions on baseboard dust.

I haven't chosen anything yet - I think I might rent You've Got Mail on Amazon Video to watch whilst my Mum is watching Lord of the Rings.

You will really love it!



P.s I obviously have shares in the film studio that produced it.

Better out then in. Did you decide which draft letter to send?

That seems more like a present your mother is giving herself. And making it a gift makes it so awkward to turn down. Sorry.

My sympathetic nervous system has taken control this morning. Some sort of flight instinct has kicked in. I texted my boss to ask if I could take some days off this coming week. I emailed my therapist to tell him I'm leaving the city and may not make our session tomorrow. My hands are shaking and I can't catch my breath but at least I stopped crying.

There's nothing wrong with taking a few days off work but reading this post makes me honestly worry about your safety. Please don't cancel on T. We're here if you need to talk and I really do mean that.

That sucks. I wonder if he is feeling let down, as well. Do you not want chicken? As I've mentioned, I do not have a husband. I have never been married. However, it seems like it might be worth telling him how you feel, at least. Otherwise, he'll probably never know what went wrong. I doubt he was just being lazy in not making any plans. He probably thought that you did it until you said that you hadn't and appeared angry for some reason. It might seem obvious to you that the reason was that you feel he should have made plans, but he just as likely might think you didn't make plans as usual because you are angry about something else. I'm not saying that to defend him. I think it's sad that you have always been the one to make the plans. I know you don't want to spell things out, but the alternative is that he most likely won't learn from this debacle. And should he be trying to figure out what's going on? Yes. But you say you are ignoring him. I think it's quite possible he is feeling hurt, as well. So. What is there to lose by trying to talk to him? The day is already looking bleak. Sure, if you both get all defensive and accusatory, you might just fight. But you're already fighting, just silently, imo. I guess it all just comes down to if your anniversary means more to you than punishing your husband (and yourself) for making a mistake.