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  #1  
Old Aug 12, 2018, 06:45 AM
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Lemoncake Lemoncake is offline
Roses are falling.
 
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Location: Seattle.
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Welcome to the couch, old and new! A place to hang out - sometimes you get immediate feedback, sometimes you don't.

Shouting, "Cool Whip" tends to bring others out from between the cushions if you're feeling lonely.

This is a chatty thread. All are welcome. We're kind of psychologically oriented, sometimes. We try to be supportive. At times we discuss what that means.
It’s a place to plop down on the couch when you come home from work or wherever, or wake up in the middle of the night, or check in at lunch, rant a bit or not, and be among friends.

We advise you not to drink or drug and text your therapist ("T") - we speak from experience.

Sometimes the thread moves fast and you might get overlooked; sometimes it moves slowly and all you hear are crickets. Sometimes you get hugged or thanked pages later. So if it's a bigger question, you might want to start a new thread.

Grab a cushion, a spot on the floor, or an armchair in the corner and make yourselves comfy!

You've Got Mail is a 1998 American romantic comedy-drama film starring Tom Hanks and Meg Ryan, directed by Nora Ephron. The film is about two people in an online romance who are unaware that they are also business rivals.
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88Butterfly88, LostOnTheTrail

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  #2  
Old Aug 12, 2018, 06:57 AM
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LostOnTheTrail LostOnTheTrail is online now
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Hey, Cake.

Thanks for the new couch. Thinking about giving the movie a go. Looks good, and I know I need a laugh at the moment.
__________________
'Somewhere up above the great divide
Where the sky is wide, and the clouds are few
A man can see his way clear to the light
Just hold on tight, that's all you gotta do...'

Steve Earle - Fort Worth Blues

'You have all the grace you need for today, and today is all that matters.' - Steve Austin
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CantExplain
  #3  
Old Aug 12, 2018, 07:03 AM
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Lemoncake Lemoncake is offline
Roses are falling.
 
Member Since: May 2017
Location: Seattle.
Posts: 10,065
Do it!!!!!!

It's the cutest thing ever and it gives me hope that I'll eventually meet someone xD. I would also recommend The shop around the corner even though it's black and white but it was based on that. Other ones that are amazing: The pursuit of happyness, Little women, A little princess.

Do you like Sci-fi? Star trek all the way- but start with the 2009 film. I never understood Star wars to be honest. I thought it was cute when R mentioned a character (Kylo Ren) but I was blank.
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CantExplain
  #4  
Old Aug 12, 2018, 07:04 AM
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LonesomeTonight LonesomeTonight is offline
Always in This Twilight
 
Member Since: Feb 2015
Location: US
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Quote:
Originally Posted by ChickenNoodleSoup View Post
I don't think it had much to do with who posted it, things just got a bit out of hand. People will fight when some topics come up, but that's part of life, not a reason to avoid these topics. And I agree with Lemoncake, your posts are most of the time interesting to read and give me ideas to think about. Honestly, when I first started to take therapy more seriously, I remember coming to this forum and reading stuff from you and maybe 2 or 3 other people which gave me enough courage to bring certain things up in therapy and made me understand certain aspects of therapy better.

Aw, thanks, CNS. It's good to know my posts have a positive effect on people and their therapy. This forum has really helped me, too, especially to understand things like transference and to make me realize I'm not alone in certain things. And for support and understanding.
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Lemoncake
  #5  
Old Aug 12, 2018, 07:05 AM
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LostOnTheTrail LostOnTheTrail is online now
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Member Since: Aug 2011
Location: England
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Lemoncake View Post
Do it!!!!!!

It's the cutest thing ever and it gives me hope that I'll eventually meet someone xD. I would also recommend The shop around the corner even though it's black and white but it was based on that. Other ones that are amazing: The pursuit of happyness, Little women, A little princess.

Do you like Sci-fi?

I'm not really sure - I struggle with fast-paced action and gore, so I can imagine being very selective.
__________________
'Somewhere up above the great divide
Where the sky is wide, and the clouds are few
A man can see his way clear to the light
Just hold on tight, that's all you gotta do...'

Steve Earle - Fort Worth Blues

'You have all the grace you need for today, and today is all that matters.' - Steve Austin
Thanks for this!
CantExplain
  #6  
Old Aug 12, 2018, 07:16 AM
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StressedMess StressedMess is offline
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Ya'll snuck a new couch in here while I was asleep!
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atisketatasket
  #7  
Old Aug 12, 2018, 07:40 AM
stopdog stopdog is offline
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There did seem to be some unexplained effort to make sure the new couch would get started quicker rather than later
__________________
Please NO @

Selfishness is not living as one wishes to live, it is asking others to live as one wishes to live.
Oscar Wilde
Well Behaved Women Seldom Make History - Laurel Thatcher Ulrich
Pain is inevitable. Suffering is optional.
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atisketatasket, StressedMess
  #8  
Old Aug 12, 2018, 07:53 AM
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Lemoncake Lemoncake is offline
Roses are falling.
 
Member Since: May 2017
Location: Seattle.
Posts: 10,065
OOooh that was me- by the end of this thread you will all have watched this movie!


Last edited by Lemoncake; Aug 12, 2018 at 08:18 AM.
Thanks for this!
unaluna
  #9  
Old Aug 12, 2018, 08:11 AM
Anonymous54879
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LT..in regards to your question regarding blocking someone/putting someone on ignore..they would not be able to respond to your threads. But if you put anyone on ignore then you just have to make sure you do not start threads that everyone uses like the couch..In session Today or the Dear T thread because those have to be made available for everyone in the community to participate in. But you can start as many as your own threads as you want and those you have on ignore just won’t be able to comment on your thread. I have 5 or6 people on ignore.
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LonesomeTonight, unaluna
  #10  
Old Aug 12, 2018, 08:17 AM
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Lemoncake Lemoncake is offline
Roses are falling.
 
Member Since: May 2017
Location: Seattle.
Posts: 10,065
In SD's words "The woman" T texted me back on a sunday with an exclamation mark. Despite telling me she didn't answer on weekends. So she failed there. I don't like her over eagerness- it's irritating,and she misspelt my name to boot.

I want R. I want R. I want R
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  #11  
Old Aug 12, 2018, 08:22 AM
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Lemoncake Lemoncake is offline
Roses are falling.
 
Member Since: May 2017
Location: Seattle.
Posts: 10,065
Lost: also Shrek 2!
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CantExplain
  #12  
Old Aug 12, 2018, 08:52 AM
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LonesomeTonight LonesomeTonight is offline
Always in This Twilight
 
Member Since: Feb 2015
Location: US
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Lemoncake View Post
In SD's words "The woman" T texted me back on a sunday with an exclamation mark. Despite telling me she didn't answer on weekends. So she failed there. I don't like her over eagerness- it's irritating,and she misspelt my name to boot.

I want R. I want R. I want R

My T uses exclamation points in texts/emails, to the point that if he doesn't include on, I worry something is wrong or he's annoyed. And I wouldn't consider him particularly overeager. So that might just be her style.


Was she just texting you to confirm appointment? I think appointment-related stuff is generally a different category for them (it is for my T, like he allows text for scheduling and that's all)--she might just mean she doesn't reply to more detailed emails on the weekends. I wouldn't write her off entirely!
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CantExplain
  #13  
Old Aug 12, 2018, 09:00 AM
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ruh roh ruh roh is offline
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LT, what jersey said about not being able to start a new couch or IST or Dear T thread is probably the biggest consideration for you since you have started those, but all you would have to do is not start them. I use ignore temporarily to get people from hounding me, as my main issue is feeling preyed on when my posts keep getting thrown back at me in replies and I just want to end it. It's my deal. Reminds me of being trapped in the house as a kid and having abuser keep hunting and chasing me. I get triggered so I just use "ignore" until the other person stops. It's a self preservation thing. I think sometimes people get wrapped up in the moment and someone has to pull the plug to make it stop.
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Anonymous45127, kecanoe, LonesomeTonight, unaluna
  #14  
Old Aug 12, 2018, 09:03 AM
Anonymous32891
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Me and family members was talking about Ebony earlier and I'm sad now

I miss my furbaby again

I wish she'd never suffered at the hands of those scumbags

Poor furbaby never deserved that to happen to her

And I hate the number three so here's another sad face to make it to 4 sad faces
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Anonymous45127
  #15  
Old Aug 12, 2018, 09:29 AM
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Lemoncake Lemoncake is offline
Roses are falling.
 
Member Since: May 2017
Location: Seattle.
Posts: 10,065
Quote:
Originally Posted by LonesomeTonight View Post
My T uses exclamation points in texts/emails, to the point that if he doesn't include on, I worry something is wrong or he's annoyed. And I wouldn't consider him particularly overeager. So that might just be her style.

Was she just texting you to confirm appointment? I think appointment-related stuff is generally a different category for them (it is for my T, like he allows text for scheduling and that's all)--she might just mean she doesn't reply to more detailed emails on the weekends. I wouldn't write her off entirely!
I sent her confirmation of payment. I know you're right and I feel like I'm just looking for reasons not to like her, because I know myself enough to know that I get attached to everything and everyone. Holden was right: "Don't tell anybody anything, If you do you start missing everybody".

The waiting is the hardest part. I'm still hoping that when R wrote "I'll be back on monday" he means tomorrow despite giving the dates 1-27th of August. "We will wait at your gate. Hoping like the blind". But I realise that my original email sounded cheery. I didn't write that I was struggling or things were "bad".

I'm in a coldplay mood right. "The hardest part was letting go not taking part".

Last edited by Lemoncake; Aug 12, 2018 at 09:48 AM.
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  #16  
Old Aug 12, 2018, 09:33 AM
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Lemoncake Lemoncake is offline
Roses are falling.
 
Member Since: May 2017
Location: Seattle.
Posts: 10,065
Quote:
Originally Posted by whispershadow View Post
Me and family members was talking about Ebony earlier and I'm sad now

I miss my furbaby again

I wish she'd never suffered at the hands of those scumbags

Poor furbaby never deserved that to happen to her

And I hate the number three so here's another sad face to make it to 4 sad faces
It won't take away all the pain that she went through, but I bet she knew she was loved when you looked after her.
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LonesomeTonight
  #17  
Old Aug 12, 2018, 09:36 AM
Anonymous32891
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Poor furbaby Ebony used to run away every time anyone came to the door (exception being two people, me and my mum, everyone else poor furbaby ran from)
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Anonymous45127, CantExplain
  #18  
Old Aug 12, 2018, 09:40 AM
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Lemoncake Lemoncake is offline
Roses are falling.
 
Member Since: May 2017
Location: Seattle.
Posts: 10,065
Quote:
Originally Posted by whispershadow View Post
Poor furbaby Ebony used to run away every time anyone came to the door (exception being two people, me and my mum, everyone else poor furbaby ran from)
Trust is not an easy thing to build up, but I think that sentence says a lot- that she felt safe with you.

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Anonymous45127
  #19  
Old Aug 12, 2018, 09:43 AM
stopdog stopdog is offline
underdog is here
 
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In my experience - I have had cats for over 50 years - most run and hide from strangers/people who come to the door because that is what cats just do. I have only had a couple who thought they were dogs and would greet strangers right off the bat.
__________________
Please NO @

Selfishness is not living as one wishes to live, it is asking others to live as one wishes to live.
Oscar Wilde
Well Behaved Women Seldom Make History - Laurel Thatcher Ulrich
Pain is inevitable. Suffering is optional.
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atisketatasket, CantExplain, UnderRugSwept, WarmFuzzySocks
  #20  
Old Aug 12, 2018, 09:47 AM
Anonymous32891
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Quote:
Originally Posted by stopdog View Post
In my experience - I have had cats for over 50 years - most run and hide from strangers/people who come to the door because that is what cats just do. I have only had a couple who thought they were dogs and would greet strangers right off the bat.

We know someone hit poor Ebony hard enough to break her ribs, the vet found the evidance on xrays , we believe that was why she was so scared by new people

Poor furbaby would run upstairs, dive into bed and try and make herself as small as she could until she was sure the new person wasn't about to come upstairs after her
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Anonymous45127
  #21  
Old Aug 12, 2018, 09:47 AM
stopdog stopdog is offline
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I am confused about why some posts get the hug thing.
Of course, I am not all the certain about the hug button in general, but I don't get what the point of the hug button for a reasonably unemotional statement post would be.
__________________
Please NO @

Selfishness is not living as one wishes to live, it is asking others to live as one wishes to live.
Oscar Wilde
Well Behaved Women Seldom Make History - Laurel Thatcher Ulrich
Pain is inevitable. Suffering is optional.
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Lemoncake, SalingerEsme
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Anonymous45127
  #22  
Old Aug 12, 2018, 09:50 AM
Anonymous32891
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idk about other people but I tend to click both buttons, the thanks and the hug thing because it's what this dumb fart does
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Anonymous45127, CantExplain
  #23  
Old Aug 12, 2018, 09:50 AM
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Lemoncake Lemoncake is offline
Roses are falling.
 
Member Since: May 2017
Location: Seattle.
Posts: 10,065
Sorry I couldn't help it.

I would give one for: my store ran out of my favorite chocolate.

but not for: the store ran out of chocolate.
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CantExplain
  #24  
Old Aug 12, 2018, 09:54 AM
Lemoncake's Avatar
Lemoncake Lemoncake is offline
Roses are falling.
 
Member Since: May 2017
Location: Seattle.
Posts: 10,065
Quote:
Originally Posted by whispershadow View Post
We know someone hit poor Ebony hard enough to break her ribs, the vet found the evidance on xrays , we believe that was why she was so scared by new people

Poor furbaby would run upstairs, dive into bed and try and make herself as small as she could until she was sure the new person wasn't about to come upstairs after her
That's so sad to hear. The poor furbaby.
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LonesomeTonight
  #25  
Old Aug 12, 2018, 09:56 AM
stopdog stopdog is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by whispershadow View Post

Poor furbaby would run upstairs, dive into bed and try and make herself as small as she could until she was sure the new person wasn't about to come upstairs after her
While certainly unfortunate that the cat was treated that way - I do think there is some anthropomorphizing going on here. I have had pets who also had unfortunate backgrounds and they had quirks. But then I have also had cats that I raised from tiny kittenhood who came from the equivalent of upper middle class, cat Montessori, natural organic food fed, hand woven linen whelping bed families who also had quirks and who would run and hide every time anyone came to the house, even from people who were there all the time.
Cats have quirks no matter their background in my experience.

I think a lot of us do anthropomorphize. I do it. I am even often baffled at how easily my animals seem to be able to train me more than I do them. And I have the thumb and several degrees. I would suggest that it might be possible to spend time thinking about the happy parts rather than dwelling on the unfortunate parts that one did not cause and cannot change and just seem to be a way to continue unhappiness.
__________________
Please NO @

Selfishness is not living as one wishes to live, it is asking others to live as one wishes to live.
Oscar Wilde
Well Behaved Women Seldom Make History - Laurel Thatcher Ulrich
Pain is inevitable. Suffering is optional.

Last edited by stopdog; Aug 12, 2018 at 10:24 AM.
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atisketatasket, feralkittymom, kecanoe, unaluna, UnderRugSwept
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