Couch 180:

I know you're right. I thought I had worked through most of the guilt I feel about what happened, but the thought of reporting him and getting him in more trouble is dredging all that up again. He can be fined $500 and/or up to 6 months jail time for contempt of court.

The longer he is in jail and away from you (and society at large), the better, imo.

Maybe your therapist can help?

R u sure you have the right thread / forum? A lot of people post similar or same stuff on multiple threads. You would usually get a message from a moderator if you said something against the rules. Somebody "not liking" usually isnt enough to delete, and ive never seen you even be sarcastic, so i would be really surprised if that happened that your post got deleted.

Thankfully, I have a session in 2 hours.

He's never going to leave me alone.

Thank you Una. I think many posts got removed from the thread I was on so it all makes more sense now.

Yeah, that happens sometimes if there's an offensive/reported post in there--they might remove posts replying to or commenting on reported post as well. (This happened with a thread I posted once.) So it may not be anything you said or did wrong, just kind of trying to remove anything connected to an offensive post.

I agree that you should report him. He brought all this on himself. And he knows the rules about contacting you. But I can also understand your mixed feelings. I hope your T can help you with this today.

The tea party/baby shower went really well this weekend. I was anxious but I took my anxiety medication and it helped ease the anxiety and I was able to be sociable. The Mommy to be was really happy. It was nice to hang out with the ladies even if I don't know most of them really well.

So I'm back at home now waiting for my work at home internet to be installed. Of course I haven't heard from Cox yet, I probably should have just stayed at work. I have a really weird feeling that they're not going to show up and it's going to be another 6 months for my work at home. i don't know why i'm such a pessimist sometimes.

Hopefully you will hear from Cox soon and it will all get set up.

i'm just being a whiner. sorry couch. the crowded-ness and noise at the office is just so on my last nerve lately... i'm grumpy.

although i am about to start cooking, which i love to do, so... that will help said grumpiness. i have to be here this afternoon anyway for Cox to come so I bought ground beef and sausage and am going to make a meatloaf for h and son, and some pork chops that were really cheap i plan to find a recipe for those in the instant pot.

H just left for a job yay quiet house!

i think my grumpy just evaporated.

Beautiful table settings!

Was really anxious. Got to session, calmed down a lot. Now I'm in the process of reporting and anxiety is ramping up again. Waiting for a sheriff to call me back.

yay tech just left. internet for working at home done. and i have 2 meatloafs (meatloaves?) in the oven. they smell good even though i don't eat red meat anymore. (working on not eating chicken/turkey too.) pork chops are next on the agenda.

my car is back in the shop woohoo!! haha at least it's only been a week or so since last time it was there so there won't be any charge this time for them to fix it right this time

This is great news!

They're not going to do anything except not allow him to contact me on that system because he hasn't been served yet. I guess what the judge said at his sentencing about no contact doesn't matter? I'm annoyed and feel like nothing more than useless pawn in a game. Why wasn't he served on time? Because my order sat in someone's inbox for a whole week and was only discovered when I called to ask for a status update. Then I find out they only go to the prison on Fridays so he won't get served until two weeks after I renewed it and apparently it doesn't count until it's in his hands. He gets to invade my life again with no repercussions. And why doesn't what the judge said count? I have the audio recording. I know he said "no contact with" me.

I am so sorry NP. That seems so wrong. So very wrong. I wish I knew what else to say but I just don't. Sending safe hugs.

Did he wait to contact you till the first restraining order was expired? What a creep.

Do you have a lawyer? If not I would suggest getting one.

Yes what atat said.

Yes, apparently. The first one expired on 10/6. I renewed on 9/28. I just looked up his case records online. Under sentencing details there's a section titled Other that says "No contact with " my name. Can't they enforce this? I'm feeling rather vengeful right now and want him to be punished for this.

I don’t know. You would think so because it sounds like he’s in violation of his sentencing agreement (he pled, right?).

If you don’t have a lawyer can you report it to the DA’s office?

I say be sure he gets punished. Let him fear you.

NP, I am so sorry you're paying the price for their mistakes and oversights. Even from the limited information you've posted, there are so many ways this system has failed you.

Yes.

And not just because of how you're feeling, but because the message it sends is that you're not going to overlook it any more.

Is there a victim's advocacy group you can contact?

I'm angry that you followed the right steps in the right order, and you end up having to deal with his bullsh** anyway. That's messed up.