Couch 185: The Labyrinth

Waterloo12345 · Dec 28, 2018, 08:13 AM

Drinking coffee in the garden - does that count as 'gardening????

LostOnTheTrail · Dec 28, 2018, 08:43 AM

You're outside - yay!

Cold update behind trigger

Possible trigger:

I am still more snot than me, currently in the grip of a sinus headache. Throat remains sore on day four.

Dec 28, 2018, 09:13 AM

Morning couch. I'm getting burned out from all this overtime. I begged out of 4 hours on Saturday so now instead of working 59 hours this week, I'll only be doing 55. Yay! Ha.

I'm too old for this ****.

Dec 28, 2018, 09:16 AM

Oh and we have a hard freeze warning this weekend, it's rare to have that kind of weather here! Brr. We need to get a new window in our bedroom cuz the current one has a long crack in it and it's cold in there, we have 3 blankets on our bed one of them a super warm quilt my sister made.

DP_2017 · Dec 28, 2018, 10:54 AM

So something was said on Christmas that really bothered me, normally I'd tell my T about it but obviously I'm not able to. It's bugging me still because now my family keeps making similar comments and laughing.

What happened was we were talking about gag gifts (we do that now instead of normal gifts) and my brother was like

Possible trigger:

Maybe mom could blow up the photo of her and your dead dog and blow it up for you. Sadly this photo ACTUALLY exists, when he died, mom asked my aunt to take photos of her holding his dead body and they are on her phone.

Anyway she laughed, and now 3 more similar comments have been made. It's really starting to get to me and I'm becoming scared that she will actually somehow show me, which would be the literal worst thing to happen to me. I can not ever see that. Mentally, I'd lose it.

I just really hate my family

unaluna · Dec 28, 2018, 11:23 AM

Woke up to the power out. NO COFFEE!!

WarmFuzzySocks · Dec 28, 2018, 11:33 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by unaluna

Woke up to the power out. NO COFFEE!!

NOOOO!!!

Here, for you.

atisketatasket · Dec 28, 2018, 11:36 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by unaluna

Woke up to the power out. NO COFFEE!!

Your natural effervescence should carry you through.

unaluna · Dec 28, 2018, 11:37 AM

I might just use hot water from the sink.

ETA - hey, its on! Wasnt supposed to be on until 2. I dont know if theyre done with repairs, but we will see!

WarmFuzzySocks · Dec 28, 2018, 11:40 AM

DP, that “joke” is really not funny or even okay. It’s cruel.

I am so sorry.

unaluna · Dec 28, 2018, 11:45 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ArtieSwimsOn

Oh and we have a hard freeze warning this weekend, it's rare to have that kind of weather here! Brr. We need to get a new window in our bedroom cuz the current one has a long crack in it and it's cold in there, we have 3 blankets on our bed one of them a super warm quilt my sister made.

I saw that! Blizzard in the Land of Enchantment! I been fixated lately on New Mexico. Esp how no one in America knows it's an American state.

Dec 28, 2018, 11:53 AM

I want to go there again. Been a long time.

SlumberKitty · Dec 28, 2018, 11:55 AM

Good morning Couchies! It's Friday! For me, I have to get through 7.1 hours more of work and then a four day weekend. I'm still really depressed which is bugging me, but I'm hoping four days of R and R will help. Nothing much planned. Gotta clean my room at my parents house. UGH. At least it's DONUT FRIDAY at work! But I pretty much already finished my work and now I'm like what do I do for the next 7 hours and 10 minutes. Hmmm. Hopefully not wallow in depression. Hugs to anyone who wants one. Kit

LonesomeTonight · Dec 28, 2018, 11:59 AM

That's really messed up, DP, I'm sorry. It's also really odd those photos were taken and are still on her phone? I mean, he was your dog, not hers, right?

DP_2017 · Dec 28, 2018, 12:10 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by LonesomeTonight

That's really messed up, DP, I'm sorry. It's also really odd those photos were taken and are still on her phone? I mean, he was your dog, not hers, right?

Yes but everything is about her. My t couldn't stand her because she always did that. Even in my grief, I'd say how sad I was and she would be "well how do you think I feel?" So it was hard to get support outside of t

Idk why she wanted the pics. It disturbs me greatly

Dec 28, 2018, 02:04 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by DP_2017

Yes but everything is about her. My t couldn't stand her because she always did that. Even in my grief, I'd say how sad I was and she would be "well how do you think I feel?" So it was hard to get support outside of t

Idk why she wanted the pics. It disturbs me greatly

That’s really twisted. Her wanting the pics and your brothers comment are both really freaking twisted.

velcro003 · Dec 28, 2018, 02:05 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by stopdog

I think it is normal

so you also don’t remember large swaths of your childhood?

Quote:

Originally Posted by NP_Complete

I suffer from this too. I have like the highlights but I don't really have a whole sense of myself or my parents. I wasn't abused as a child, but I do think my childhood was really stressful for me because we moved a lot, like almost every year up until 8th grade. Several of these moves were in the middle of the school year also and as an introvert I had a hard time with all this. This is my hypothesis for this issue anyway.

As an example, something that recently came up in therapy. We moved from the city to a suburb of the city and were in this new home for maybe half a year before we moved to another state. This was 5th grade, so old enough to have good memories of a place. I remember this 2-story, big, white house. That's it. I can't remember what my bedroom looked like, how the house was laid out, I couldn't even tell you if it had a kitchen because I can't remember it. I feel like there's something wrong with me because I can't remember stuff like this. I know other people can. I keep hoping my therapist will offer up some answer on this for me. I'm sorry you struggle with something similar.

yeah all i remember from one house we lived in was that my dad painted my bedroom oink. can’t remember anything else. i know we moved several times-i only remember the house that we had from 5th grade until i graduated college.

Quote:

Originally Posted by StressedMess

Velcro

I have similar lapses. Pre-PC I thought it was memory loss, but now I figure I dissociated a lot as a kid. My sister has a memory like a steel trap, mine is swiss cheese.

yeah my memory is swiss cheese too. my T has brought up the possibility of dissociation up to me a few times. i feel like that can’t really be true bc i am not dissociative as an adult.

Quote:

Originally Posted by unaluna

You dont remember your clothes, or anything about school? Breakfast, lunch, or dinner? Television? When the mail came? Did you have a bicycle? Kids on the block? Shopping? I realize a lot of these are "Leave it to Beaver" era experiences. Have you tried writing about a typical day? I cant even imagine what this would be like - for me, the events in my mind have always been like they happened yesterday.

Eta - my brother doesnt remember what i do.

no way. i have zero memories of K-4th grade. no idea of what my schools were like, what teachers i had, if i had friends. i don’t exist in my mind.

velcro003 · Dec 28, 2018, 02:05 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Jersey 3

That’s really twisted. Her wanting the pics and your brothers comment are both really freaking twisted.

yeah, extremely effed up.

SlumberKitty · Dec 28, 2018, 03:31 PM

I hate working the day before a holiday. If you are hourly, you have to stay the whole day if you want to get paid for the holiday, but if you are salary, you can leave whenever and get paid for the holiday. So we are really slow and the number of employees are slowly dwindling, not including the number of employees on vacation, so we started out with less than normal, soon it will just be a couple of us sitting here with nothing to do but watch the clock. *Shakes head* seems like a waste of payroll to me. But it's not up to me, so I am a clock watcher today. Unfortunately, it is just making me dwell on feeling depressed and that's super bad for me. I need distraction!! Kit

Dec 28, 2018, 03:34 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by SlumberKitty

I hate working the day before a holiday. If you are hourly, you have to stay the whole day if you want to get paid for the holiday, but if you are salary, you can leave whenever and get paid for the holiday. So we are really slow and the number of employees are slowly dwindling, not including the number of employees on vacation, so we started out with less than normal, soon it will just be a couple of us sitting here with nothing to do but watch the clock. *Shakes head* seems like a waste of payroll to me. But it's not up to me, so I am a clock watcher today. Unfortunately, it is just making me dwell on feeling depressed and that's super bad for me. I need distraction!! Kit

Where I work is the same, we have to be here the full day before and the full day after a holiday to get paid for the holiday....