Couch 193: The Aurora Borealis Couch

Aw, you would share the gosling with me?

Now that's love.

Can I get some pocket riders for tomorrow? I’m afraid all the progress and trust T has built with me since December is going to go up in a ball of flames and I am going to feel crushed. Thank god H doesn’t feel the need to drive me tomorrow so I can find someplace safe after session if I need to. I don’t *think* T will crush me... but all my other T experiences have been really crappy so I am a mess.
Thanks

Sure, I'm in.

iam in too

its my D 16th birthday and i am feeling left out as she has her girlfriends over and they arent following birthday protocol. Its just hard to let go. but i havent been as involved as i was previously. i am starting to feel redundant on all levels.

amost of all i want cake. I think thats it i really want cake and no one else is ready yet

I'm sorry you're feeling left out, BCM. Hopefully they will get with the program soon. Can't procrastinate about cake!

I'll hop in, Omers.

Thanks for all the support. Got through the night OK. My eyes are all puffy from a mix of crying and allergies (Allegra does NOT last 24 hours...). H is acting like nothing happened, which is his usual state after something like that.

Hopping in, Omers.

hugs, LT and BCM

Oops! I just ate mine.

Is calling into work for mental health stuff acceptable? I barely slept and I can hardly function right now. I am so depressed, I'm even worried about my ability to drive right now

Glad you are ok. Hopefully you can talk to T about the MC idea stuff today and maybe get that going with H

Some people like to just move past issues and not make them worse. I'm one of the "act like nothing" happened types.

If you barely slept, it's also physical, not just mental. You could just say you're not feeling well--you don't have to specify if physical, mental, or both.

Three years ago today, things turned on their head. Floundering, eating to cope. Hate this.

I hope you feel a smidge better. Talking to your husband about trying to improve the relationship shouldn't be a no go area.

edited: because of missing out words

Nothing like feeling extremely depressed and your mom screaming at you to "grow up"

That sounds rough, DP. I bet it's hard to deal with grief and self-worth stuff when you're constantly having more abuse heaped on you. It would be hard to even catch your breath.

Yes i know i need to get away from her to ever fully heal but right now I'm so depressed to even get the energy to job or house hunt. I did think of asking baby t to do a session with her and i. She wont ever hear me without a 3rd party around

OK pocket riders, don’t know if it is allergies or dissociation but I am feeling all drifty... anyone got a pin to poke me with (either way) lol

What is the birthday protocol? Do you mean rules?

This and other things you have said suggest to me that your H might be the sort who suppresses his feelings (for whatever reason). This is all speculation, obviously, because I don't know your H, but it sounds like he suppresses and the emotions come out in passive aggressive comments or explosions of anger at you or your daughter for trivial things unrelated to the actual source of his anger.

For example, he made that comment about not calling your therapist recently, then claimed it was a joke, which didn't ring true to me. I didn't elaborate on this at the time, but when I had said that your husband felt wronged by your therapist, I had been thinking about how he had once expressed some jealousy. I can't remember the exact circumstances, but it was something like he said he felt weird having you be so caught up in needing a response from another man. Something like that. It may have been after you sent an email or something. I think it was with your current therapist, but I could be wrong.

Anyway, has your husband ever had individual therapy? Maybe he would find that helpful, even if he isn't interested in going to a couple's therapist right now.

What else would one do? How else do you expect him to act?
I am not trying to be confrontational - I really don't know what someone would be expected to do the next day.

I think it depends on how intense the argument was and if there was a resolution. If a lot of things were said and both parties went to bed angry, acting like nothing happened seems kind of odd to me.